Amusing Responses You Got From People When You Came Out About Being An Atheist.

I thougt It would be interesting to see some of the more comical responses people have received upon coming out. I'll start things off with my favorite.

I was about 16 and a guy in class found out that I didn't believe in god and he came up to me and asked

Boy: "So do you really not believe in god"

Me: "No."

Boy: "So.... You worship the devil?!"

I got this one in one form or another many times..... Gotta love the bible belt! :)


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Tell him there's evidence the sun will come up tomorrow. It's a predictable event based on the laws of physics. In that, his belief is justified.

Religion, on the other hand...

Guy: "Proof of God is everywhere. You know that bumblebees scientifically can't fly right?"
Me: LAUGHS. STILL LAUGHING. "You know thats not true..."
Guy: "It is true." (pissed and dead serious)

The next day...
Me: 'The original calculations that reported bees can't fly was based upon a simplified linear treatment of oscillating aerofoils. This theory ignores the effect of dynamic stall, which is an airflow separation that creates a large vortex above the wing. This creates several times the lift of the aerofoil in regular flight. Aerodynamic analysis shows that the bumblebee can fly because their wings encounter dynamic stall in every oscillation cycle."
Guy: "Oh. Well how do you explain... (blah blah blah)"

It was pointless, but worth a try. This answer was lifted from wiki, so I'm not sure how accurate it is but it sure sounded good.
You may want to add that the SAME explanation is needed to explain why modern so-called "unstable" fighter planes can fly: without the near-vacuum properties of turbulent air (the special state of the air in the vortex you quote) modern airplanes could not generate enough lift, either, just like the bumblebee...but, of course, those were designed :-)
Well this wasn't so much me "coming out" but rather "being outed." I was attending a youth-group session at age 14 (not of my own choice, but at the insistence of my quasi-catholic father who thought it would make me believe in god) when the pastor approached me afterward and inquired about my degree of faith. My brother had apparently informed him that I wasn't on board with the whole program, and he asked me if I'd be willing to engage in a debate with his "top student" in front of the congregation.

The only part of this that's funny is the point during the ensuing debate when the pastor realized what a bad idea it was to underestimate scientific literacy. I almost felt bad trouncing the poor kid, but then didn't, and proceeded to continue said trouncing.

I'm no longer welcome at that church.
I wish I could have seen that! Its always amusing to watch debates like these, especially when science wins as it normally does.
EPIC WIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
have you got video/audio????
My mom has known I was an atheist since I had decided on it but the other day I asked her if she was fine with me being an atheist or if it bugged her. Heres the conversation:

Me: Mom, does it bug you that I'm atheist?
Mom: You can't be an atheist
Me: *pause* What do you mean I can't be an atheist?
Mom: There has to be something, the universe didn't come from nothing
Me: And the big bang theory doesn't explain it?
Mom: ....
Me: Look, I consider myself agnostic atheist, meaning that I will never know for sure that there is or is not a god. But at this moment I am 99.9% sure that there is no god!
Mom: Oh ok (Finally understanding my pretty solid view on god/s)

We then went on to discuss her views on the subject, which I then discovered that she was a deist. Oddly she would not accept that definition of her beliefs and said that if she had to fill out a form of some sort she would check the christian box in the religion section, even though she said she does not believe in the christian god..
I think a lot of people are like that and the number of actual, true-believing "Christians" in the U.S. is overinflated.
Exactly! I try explaining that all the time. Almost everyone I've known who claimed to be Catholic wasn't even sure what Catholicism is. I know a lot of so-called Christians who only seem to be submitting to the fear attacks, afraid of hell. It's just like when they forced the Pagan peoples of Europe to believe. The religion is nothing more than a sales organization. Especially the Jehovah's witnesses (I studied Hebrew... there is no "J" sound at all). Ever see their book on how to sell the religion? Standard reading material for them.
I was called brain-washed and all that. Nothing so funny really. The story that follows isn't that funny either, rather scary.
I was having a discussion about origins of morality and how it has nothing to do with no religion, with a friend of mine, a young woman of Jamaican descent. She's a churchgoer and claims that people have to follow something or they are lost. I told her that even if god exists nobody has a faintest idea if it want's to be worshipped and how. She agreed. Yet still stuck to her idea about having to follow bible, even if it was written by bronze-age sexist slave-owners and not any supreme being. Since I know bible very well and sadly she doesn't I quoted some of my favorite passages on slavery. It didn't work. She was a bit shocked but decided to defend her believes no matter what.
She: It was ok in those times.
Me: Why not now? Is it because it's immoral?
She: No, because it's illegal. If it was moral then it has to be moral now.
Me: So if you were a slave, you'd obey your master like the Bible says?
She: Yes.
Me: And given an opportunity you'd own slaves and beat them like Bible allows you to?
She: Yes.
Me: Even though your ancestors suffered as slaves???
She: Well, we all have to follow something and I follow Bible

Seriously, what do u say to that?!?!?!
Answer: "Fine - you follow the bible. I prefer common sense."


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