I recently had bumped into a young lady who had went to high school with my son.  She has been graduated now for about 6 or 7 years.  After catching me up on what she had been doing with her life since graduating she told me that she used to be an alcoholic and had a drug addiction.


I told her that I was sorry that this had happened to her and told her that if she ever needed help or just wanted somebody to talk to; that my wife and I are always available for her.  Then she told me that thanks to god she is now clean and has been for about 18 months.  I just smiled and said good for you and said this; "Don't short change yourself or the people who helped you during this very difficult time!"  And she said; "What do you mean?"  And, I told her that, "The people and family who were there during your troubled times are the real people that deserve the thanks and praise; and most importantly...thank yourself!"


Anyway, I was just wanting to hear from other like-minded ladies and gentlemen on what they would or have said to someone in a similiar situation.  And, please feel free to critic my response to this young lady!


Thanks, Peace out!

Jeff Dempsey

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I love this site too. Rational discourse is wonderful... and a stark contrast to the emotion thought that runs rampant everywhere else!.

Join loc. NORML (facebook's nice)
and have lawyers' # handy
decrim in many cities lately btw fck the mainstream hype

There's a group here at the Nexus (it's plugged regularly on ShockNet Radio's American Heathen and other shows) called Sober WithOut Gods. It's an Atheist alternative to AA and similar organizations.

Kind of small here, but worth checking out. Here's the link to the group: http://www.atheistnexus.org/group/soberwithoutgods

Hope this helps!!!

Here!  Here!  Your preaching to the choir here, brother!  Lol!

AA (NA etc) work for me. Sure it was written from a Christian context but this is the 21st century. I relied on Living Sober in the early years. It's a secular look at AA life published by AA in the 1970s.

There is a lot of great literature by atheists for atheist about the AA model. Some reject the Steps completely and others re-write the same principles in secular terms. Google AA atheist or agnostic and you can find some if you're interested.

AA et al are hardly the be all and end all, but anyone who talks from their own experience with AA or NA are talking about a particular experience with particular groups. Some are more liberal, some conservative, some very ritualistic, some not, some with prayer, some without.

John L has a 2014 book, AN ATHEIST IN ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS. He's sober 46 years and relies on the one-day-at-a-time approach and leaning on his fellows. He rejects the Twelve Steps almost entirely. He's AA and he's hardly religious.

There are agnostic and atheist groups (200 of them) http://www.agnosticaanyc.org/worldwide.html

Facebook, google and Yahoo all have 12 Step chats, groups etc for atheist, freethinkers, agnostics.

Looks like an old post now, but it popped up so I'm replying.

Your advice was true and valid. It was all her and the people who helped her. No invisible friend had anything to do with it. She says "what do you mean?" It means she thought all the  power and glory here goes to god because she has stopped drugs and alcohol. Used to be an alcoholic. I'm sorry. You are always an alcoholic but the thing is are you a practicing alcoholic? If you believe "god did it" in stopping your habits you are likely again to go back into them once you change your mind on god. This is what the term "backslider" means in christianity today. You have stopped attending church and went back into your old ways. Does that mean "the power of god" didn't work or just that you changed your mind?

You can be sober without god and also sober without the "higher power" idea. The program depends on the people, -- and you.

On another website, I started a thread about how I'd love to become an atheist preacher of sorts. We had a mother-and-daughter Jehovah's Witness team come by the house, and the idea of a woman bringing her teenage daughter into the insanity really got me going.

"WE should be preaching to THEM!" I said to my husband. "We need to save them from themselves! If something happens to them, and they need surgery or a blood transfusion, they'd DIE before allowing that!"

So I started a thread about it, how I love the concept of saving people from religion, starting with the JWs who stop by. Of course I'm not serious about knocking on doors and such, but I couldn't help but fantasize about having the same cojones as religious freaks.

Another poster said that she had survived a traumatic upbringing thanks to God. I thought to myself, she stepped into an "atheist preacher" thread and is telling us about how God saved her.

So I told her nicely that it was in fact her choice of survival method- turning to a religion instead of, say, drugs or self-destructive behavior, that saved her. Told her that SHE deserved all the credit, and that she alone had the power and strength to find the right resources.

She got very defensive, and contacted the moderators, who removed the entire thread. I was pretty angry- I had made some very good points, and wasn't the least bit rude. She came into that thread with God talk and should not have expected to have the last word in that case. I gave HER the credit that she always attributes to this god of hers, and she gets offended?! I was incredulous.

But I'm not surprised of course. Religious people always shut down an argument and play the "offended" card when they can't effectively make any good points.


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