I have been a believer almost all of my life. God was very real to me, and I went to church and even for years lived the life that I thought God wanted me to lead. Only this calendar year have I come to the fact that there is no god. It's very hard for me. Sometimes I still start to pray, just to catch myself and think what's the good of it? There is nobody out there. I find the idea of God now to be ridiculous. That there is some invisible creature out there who can change his all knowing mind because I sent the right idea at him at the right time is just laughable. I don't know why in my subconscious it's still hard for me to come to terms that I'm a atheist, even though on the surface I know.
Did anyone else have this problem? My husband is also an atheist, but he wasn't raised religious like I was, so he doesn't have the default "pray when things are bad" idea.