BURNT TOAST AND GODDIDNOTDOIT: Atheist Sees Image of the 'Birth of Earth' in Burnt Toast
Yes it’s true.
This genuine picture was photographed in Bradford-on-Avon, Wiltshire, England by atheist scientist Dr. Terence Meaden earlier this month.
He could barely withhold his excitement.
“I was having breakfast when this piece of ciabatta toast got burnt,” he said. “Suddenly I was aware that the pattern of light and darkness across the toast resembled what could have been a visible manifestation of primeval events at the time that planet Earth was forming four and a half billion years ago.
Physicist Dr. G. Terence Meaden from Oxford University continued, “I feel humbled that I should have been chosen to receive this vision and expression of non-godist reality in this unexpected way. It is plainly a subtle manifestation of the high principle of atheism that goddidnotdoit.”
It is likely to make national headlines as this sensational story spreads through the rationalist community of nonbelievers in godism. Goddidit followers may be unhappy about it though, but after all—if one imitates their sloppy use of the word ‘theory’—then “goddidit is only a ‘theory’, seeing that gods are mere constructs of the human mind”.
“It is exciting because this piece of toast was absolutely genuine. No trickery. It happened, just like that”, said Dr. Meaden—a Tommy Cooper fan.
“You can see a representation of the birthing planet taking in asteroid-size spherical fragments as Young Earth spins and grows into the big planet that we know today.”
We may expect the story to go worldwide as non-acceptors of godism take note. “All I can say is you gotta believe this, because it happened. I have always concurred with the scientific truths of the Aged Earth theory because proven scientific facts are right. Some years ago* a worthy atheist reported an image of burnt toast as depicting the Big Bang, but no photograph was ever produced—so perhaps that account was satirical. Mine is not. I have the picture to prove it."
So can we see the toast, this remarkable vision?
“I’m afraid the photograph is all that remains. The experience so overwhelmed me that, stunned and unthinkingly, I photographed it, buttered it and ate it. But I do have the negative of the original photograph, and the satisfaction of having actually eaten a piece of a nongod.”
* * * * *
* namely http://www.satireandcomment.com/0208toast.html where a pictureless image of the Big Bang was reported some years ago.
Sadly, that's probably literally true, without any irony.
The image of the big bang on toasted bread... an echo of the beginning of the universe, yeah.
Piled Higher and Deeper? I'll have a chipped beef with that.
Here’s a new finding:
Religious believers are flocking to a makeshift shrine twice a day to pray to an aubergine that looks like a Hindu god.
Praful Visram and his wife Rekha believe the opened eggplant looks like Ganesh, the multi-armed deity with an elephant's head.
The caterer from Leicester claims that the Hindu gods have blessed him and his family with the sacred vegetable and he is honouring their wishes by putting it on display.
Once it goes rotten the family plans to give it a traditional Hindu funeral.
Mr Visram, 61, said: 'One of my staff found the aubergine in a box of 20 or so we got from our wholesalers in Leicester.
'He thought it looked a bit odd, then my wife, Rekha, saw it and recognised the similarity with Ganpati Bappa - Lord Ganesh.
'We immediately placed it with reverence in the temple at work. It has been a blessing for us and I hope will bring us luck and prosperity. This has been sent to us and we shall treat this with the respect it deserves.'
Mr Visram said 80 people have come to his 4 Seasons Catering firm to venerate the vegetable, while he, his family and staff have been praying at the shrine twice a day.
He said: 'It is spreading good feeling throughout the community.'
Hina Chodai, a neighbouring caterer, said the resemblance to Ganesh, the Hindu god of wisdom, prosperity and good fortune, was remarkable.
He said: 'As soon as I heard about the aubergine I had to see it for myself.
'It is indeed a blessing for all of us. I am hoping it will bring prosperity to all who pray there.’
For pictures and to read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2319687/The-aubergine-looks...
20,000 views reached yesterday 23 May 2013.
With your toaster now producing reasonably good images of the Big Bang the people at CERN must be kicking themselves for having spent so much money on the LHC.
You are right. Someone should tell CERN. Will you perhaps write on my behalf, because I am too modest
Can this be America?
Catholics worship a weeping tree in Fresno, California
(but the tears are the excrement of aphids)
......silly people !
'Recently leaked documents from the Vatican have shown why the Catholic Church is protecting paedophiles.
Apparently, the last time they shunned a child molester, he started Islam.'
yes I think they are silly too
It is two years since this slice of wonder toast enter my life at breakfast that morning.
20414 views here now.