I'm glad to hear that you all missed the worst. Maybe this all wouldn't have happened if you guys hadn't angered god through your intolerant attitudes to gay people. We all know that lack of gay sex causes disasters, how else do you explain the massive damage to New Orleans, that was suspiciously avoided by the French Quarter*. I suggest you guys modify your behaviour, God doesn't mind that you're an atheist because he knows its the reasonable thing and doesn't like people believing in him for no good reason, but if a few of you displease him he'll FUCK UP YOUR SHIT using the highly accurate tool of NATURAL DISASTERS.

I'll bring up the deal you made with the devil for you independence in the 1770s (It's in the constitution. Have you read it? No.). He's not pleased about that either, but you've got to understand he's from a different generation.


*100% of hurricanes start in the sea, where the there is very little gay sex and even less musical theatre. Also, sea turtles are bigots.



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