My friend/coworker is a friendly, outgoing person, but doesn't use proper english (i.e., she do, he do) when she speaks or emails in the office.  We work in a corporate environment, so I have tried to gently correct her on numerous occasions, but she doesn't appear to be interested in improving.  What is equally bad is that she has a gold tooth with a heart in the middle.  She is also obese and diabetic.  We eat lunch together frequently, but it's becoming increasingly difficult to sit and watch her eat herself into a near diabetic coma.  I thought diabetics are supposed to limit their sweets, but this lady buys a candy bar for dessert at lunch and an extra for a snack later.  Yesterday, she brought pound cakes, grits and bacon in for breakfast and offered me some of her extras (which I politely declined).  She has at least 2 sodas every day and she doesn't eat fruits, vegetables, seafood, wild or brown rice, salads or virtually anything that is not fried, cheesy or greasy.  Of course, she doesn't exercise.  I had another coworker that sat right next to me pass away from a heart attack and she, too, was obese.  It's hard being friends with someone who doesn't care to improve themselves, but it's even harder to watch somebody eat themselves to death.   

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Just try to focus on that tooth.
I appreciate the info.  I know that she takes the pills instead of insulin and she says that if she lost some weight, she could eventually get off the pills, so it does sound like Type 2.  I think she checks her sugar level regularly because she says "My sugar level is high and I have to stop having so many sweets" but then she turns right around and buys the candy bars or pound cakes.  I think she's addicted to sweets. 
It sounds like she's happy the way that she is.  Maybe there are things she could do to improve her health, but it doesn't sound as if she wants to.  I do sympathize.  My uncle (who recently died of lung cancer) smoked for 30 years after watching his dad die from lung cancer.  Obviously, it was what he wanted to do even though he knew the outcome.

The description of her eating habits managed to disgust me, and I'm not exactly a walking stick. But as everyone is saying, it's her body, and her choice. Not everyone wants to try to live to be a centurion. Some people would rather die young while enjoying life than live to an old age fretting about their health. *shrug*


What you might want to do is not be around when she's eating if that bothers you. The only thing I could see you doing is explaining to her that her language is not appropriate for the professional setting. If she doesn't want to fix that, either, then let her. She's only making a fool of herself, not of you.

This lady seems to have enough issues to deal with, without having someone judge and criticise her.  Confrontational criticism of her lifestyle will not work.  You will only alienate her.  The biggest condition of change is called cognitive dissonance.  When your mind has two or more conflicting ideas, it causes a lot of psychological discomfort (or dissonance/discord).  She is almost certainly aware of what she should be eating/of how much exercise she needs, but her behaviour is the opposite of what she knows to be healthy.  So when these two conflicting ideas become strong enough and persistent enough, the internal discomfort can only be relieved by her changing her own behaviour.  And of course, it takes time.  Recovery is a complex issue and is beset by relapse and recovery.  Try and catch her doing something healthy and praise her for it.  The gold tooth is her choice and you will have to deal with your own issues over that fact.  If you want to help your friend, then finding out about the cycle of change is a good place for you to start.  These links will take you to some excellent articles and relatively short reading.  I hope this helps.



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