my name is Paul but my nickname is Arsoo. I'm from NYC and I'm glad to be a part of this forum. I'm currently an agnostic, but I still practice certain religious rituals because of my cultural upbringing and the fact that I live within close proximity to my parents, siblings, cousins, etc. Therefore, I am not exactly a believer in Armenian Catholic faith, but I am culturally Armenian-Catholic.
I still wrestle with particular thoughts. Some days I ask myself what it is that I actually believe. I cannot fully answer it. I think the whole question of whether a creator exists or not is difficult to answer. Either answer to that question (either a creator exists, or a creator doesn't), wouldn't really surprise me. One one hand I think that this is a complex universe, so intelligent design could definitely answer some big questions. However, another part of me thinks just because we don't know exactly how the universe began or how everything came to be, doesn't mean that X (or a creator) is the answer. At this point, we just don't know. I still sometimes fear the notion of a potential negative afterlife, so my first question will likely be regarding that. I would love to get some rational answers rather than the answers I receive in my community which aren't helping me get over this rather unrational fear. A young man shouldn't have to wake up in cold sweat from time to time because of some fear that was placed into him when he was 5 years old.
If there are any questions, ask away.
Have a nice day,
Welcome, Arsoo, from a happily retired Catholic. Congratulations on having made the key step - knowing that we don't know. To me, heaven and hell are significantly less believable than Santa Claus, but that's just opinion.