Today I was at the dentist getting my teeth cleaned. As much as I hate the discomfort, indignity, invasion of personal space, and 40+ years now Ive been nagged about flossing..,

The whole time, she was singing o little town of bethlehem and little drummer boy and what child is this? Jesus H Christ! Then leaving I stopped at the grocery store next door. That goddam bell ringing - what did they do, a study to dicsover the most grating sound in the universe? Then the grocery store with the worst christmas songs ever - The Carpenters meet Barry Maniloe or something!

All I could envision was Marlin Brando in Apocolypse Now.... The horror! The horror!

When will it all end? Arrrrggghhhh!!!

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Hmph!  That's right, blame me!  Like I held a gun to his head, eh?  Harrumph-harrumph-harrumph! [wry chuckle!]

There's a whole Michael Bolton Christmas album, if you are so inclined.  Come on....  I know you want it!  :-)

Ummm ... in two words:


Ha ha ha, Thank to my mother who got rubella measle in 1964 and I born deaf.  So my deaf are a big benefit for me because I can't hear that crap song. 

I have a life like you,  I wish I can hear Beyonce 's songs  but enjoy to watch  her dances and read her  closed captioning on her music video. 

Funny response!  Thank you!

Can you feel percussion?  Sometimes I like turning up the volume on the Kodo drummers and just feel it.  Plus they are so awesome and beautiful to watch.

Horror is right.  All evening,every channel, has had some country singer singing a xmas carol that, just this instant, left my brain.  Hurray!!!  I turned the tv off hours ago.

A real horror! Dentists have a way of making you speechless and then you're at their mercy: I always have to listen to very old-fashioned sex jokes. I COULD bite him...

And the supermarkets are horrible; I'm specializing in highspeed shopping so I miss most of the crap music.

A real horror! Dentists have a way of making you speechless and then you're at their mercy: I always have to listen to very old-fashioned sex jokes. I COULD bite him...

I have a very nice woman dentist who I enjoy chatting with.

I saw a male dentist once who seemed extremely sexist.  He talked to me in a very condescending sort of singsongy way, simplifying everything as if I were very stupid, similar to baby-talk - the whole time.  He talked to his (female) staff in somewhat a similar way.

It's always hard to tell in a specific instance if you're being treated with prejudice - you just know women are treated with less respect on average.  But it's hard to imagine an adult male patient being talked to with that singsongy baby-talk, dripping with condescending simplifications. 

I do think about the issues between the sexes.  I understand issues of persecution and privilege.  As it happened, this office was about 90% female.  The hygienist, and the dentist, were women.  Every dental hygienist I have ever had were women.  So I don't know what a male hygienist would have done.  

I don't know if there is a sense of same-gender bonding in such situations.  Maybe.  Probably.  I work in a healthcare office.  Most women patients there express preference for women as their providers, and many men express preference for men.  For that matter, with the ethnic mix where work, many Filipinos gravitate to Filipino providers, Russians gravitate to Russian providers, and Chinese to Chinese providers.  Generic whites, I don't know how many,  but some express that preference too.  LGBT patients often ask if there is an LGBT provider, and for good reason since many have experienced outright judgement and prejudice.  I know Mormons who seek a Mormon provider, and other Christians network in their churches to find someone of their preference.  Back to gender, the place where I work is about 50:50 gender split (the providers.  Management and assistants is about 95% female) , so it's usually possible to provide people what they want gender-wise, although many of the women providers close their practices to women when the numbers are above 60% or so, because they claim men are less work to take care of.  

At this appointment, I did feel like I was being handled roughly, rudely,and somewhat written off.  I wondered if she was anxious to get off early for the holiday and resented me for being in the way of that.  

Whatever unconscious signals I may give off unawares, I do my best to be polite and friendly to everyone, and this was no exception.  Was she reading my unconscious mannerisms and annoyance about the christmas carols?  I did not consciously express anything about the carols.  Hard to do when your mouth is being invaded by tools and ultrasound cleaners and sharp objects.  Was she just a self centered jerk?  Was it just, some people just aren't a good match together?  I don't know, but it was a more miserable appointment than usual.  And I have good teeth, all of them, no cavities in the past 40+ years.

All the while with the humming of those asinine christmas carols.  Something I had no choice about.  I was exhausted after the visit, and felt both down and irritated, although I tried to express the christmassy part of it with humor.

When i made my appointment for 6-month follow up, I did ask for a different hygienist.

I do think about the issues between the sexes.  I understand issues of persecution and privilege.

Well it seems as a woman I never get to grow up or be treated with respect. I'm in my 50's, and a man in his 50's is generally regarded as having achieved something, knowing things, grown up. Having gravitas.  This dentist was almost talking to me like "Aww! Poochikins got a boo-boo!" That was his general tone.

Dentists are quite close to you.  Their face is right next to yours, more so than with a doctor.  So it makes sense that people would want a dentist similar to them, more so than with a doctor.  I have male doctors - there's more of them to choose from. 

 I did not consciously express anything about the carols.

Some hint might have worked excellently at stopping it, though.  She was probably just singing to amuse herself.  Most people would stop right away if they got some sort of negative remark.  A song request for something you'd like to hear might have worked :)
Once my dentist had terribly bad breath and she didn't know it :( She probably had some stinky germs in her throat... and I didn't know how to tell her, I just kept wincing when she laughed and puffed out bad breath. Luckily she had figured it out by the next time I saw her.

I do think about the issues between the sexes.  I understand issues of persecution and privilege.

Same for me Luara, very often. Still, even now that I'm almost 60.  And I also wonder if I get the ´child´treatment because I'm rather short - 1.55 M. - but I try to keep my cool and often ask, "I beg your pardon?" Most of the time they behave a little better then.

Well, I find the innocuous, happy, celebratory nature of Christmas carols a welcome relief from the  messages we get the rest of the year from Christianity.

And the “stories” about changes of heart, discovery of love, kindness, generosity, the “spirit of giving”, season of sharing, etc. are also an about-face from the regular  religious dispatches.

The trend to extending the “holidays” from, like, Labor Day to, say, Memorial Day might not be a bad idea.

Can you imagine what the world would be like if Christians behaved year-round like they do at Christmas time?




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