I went from Christianity to Atheism about a few years ago. I’ve noticed an increase in my death anxiety. I can’t enjoy anything with out thinking how it won’t matter cause I’ll be dead and everything I am and love will be gone. I know I won’t know I am dead but there is something so tragic and heartbreaking that everything I am will be gone. And same for others too. When we die, a universe dies with us. I can’t stand it. What do y’all do to help?

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Hi, Raine!

Sometimes it's not easy to face one's own mortality.  For myself, I guess I've recognized that I won't live forever, but I AM healthy and in at least fair shape, so I'm not likely to keel over tomorrow.  For the time being, I do what I can, I don't do what I can't, but when the opportunity presents itself, I ADD to that first category.  Helping where and when I can is always great, and learning something new every day ranks right along side.

One other matter: there's a saying I learned from my days in the Transcendental Meditation movement: "What you put your attention on grows in your life."  If you can, put your attention on LIVING and getting everything you want out of life.  At the risk of sounding trite: LOVE your life, 'cuz it's yours for as long as you have it.

I hope this has helped.

Raine, the Catholicism I knew wanted a slave. Quitting it was easier than quitting the more gentle forms of xianity.

I was in college and knew some science. Without evidence for a god's existence, I went to two meetings of a student atheist club where I heard assertions without evidence of the non-existence of any gods. Without knowledge, I chose agnosticism, a gentle form of atheism. I enjoyed the sounds of a pipe organ but preferred jazz and other modern music.

After fifty years of agnosticism, happy mainly because I enjoyed the work people paid me well to do, but happy also because I could say god fucked up and laugh, I started telling people I am an atheist. I'm an assertive guy and people know I will answer a theist's unkind remark, so no one troubles me without my troubling them in return.

Try a more gentle withdrawal from theism's addictive drugs: helplessness, and its cause powerlessness. Religions need people who feel powerless--unable to produce the results they want. Their feeling powerless is the reason they so quickly turn to violence.

A Catholic once told me "Once a Catholic, always a ~." I replied "While a Catholic, helpless." It silenced him.

BTW, I quit my addiction to caffeine by adding increasing amounts of water to my coffee and succeeded. You can go cold turkey if you find it necessary, but is it necessary?

Do you suffer heartbreak about the years before you were conceived? 

Life is here! now! When you die you will be dead and your body will rot. The only thing of you left is the memories of you others carry forward. 

Does it not make sense to make the most of each moment you have while you are alive? 

When you spend time feeling heartbreaks about being gone you lose the opportunity to be alive here and now. 

I don't know about you, but I like waking up in the morning, eating a delicious toast breakfast with very strong coffee. I like putting on clean work clothes and going into the garden to do a task or doing a chore that needs doing inside, even if it is doing dishes; these activities mean I am alive. I don't wake up dead. Filling a day doing things I like to do makes each day special. 

I kind of like the idea of creating memories with others so that they will remember me when I am dead, cremated. One of the most important memories I leave them is communicating with them when I am alive.  If I am a good listener, I will be missed. 

You have the capacity to create memories for yourself. You are not created to be a victim of loneliness; you are created to be a verb, active, creative, imaginative, exploratory, and involved in life. 

Howdy Raine! I was much afraid of death also. Now I feel free! I do not have to worry about the Judgement of some unknown sin I commited 40 years ago that will cause me suffering for all eternity! I can truly rest in peace.

Raine, allow me to throw in one more little piece of inspiration, from the words of Sam Harris: It Is Always Now.


I thought the above was a beautiful piece of work when I first discovered it, many years ago, and that impression hasn't changed with time.  Perhaps you will find some inspiration from it as well.

CHANNELS RAINE: Thanks y'all but all of your comments are trite and self-evident. None of those comments help me with my anxiety.

Woops, Frankie Dapper emerges from the ether.  And You won't likely find anything that helps unless it is meditation or medication or the like. I don't see that theists as a group find death easy to handle either. Your deconversion may not even be the cause of your anxiety. Wish I could help...

It seems to me the basic deal is, none of us put in an order to be born into this world. We were, and we're here for a while, and we all therefore owe nature one death in return for the life it's given us. It's up to each of us and each of us alone to make what we will of our fleeting time on this planet. Dwelling on what you're doing now or dwelling on the fact that it's only temporary is at bottom your choice. Is it scary? Sure. Is it depressing? Sure. But it's only devastating and debilitating if you let it be. Pick your poison; for me, humor is the best solace. Oh yeah, alcohol, pot and sarcasm help a lot too.

Bertold, anxiety is not a choice.

But DOING something about it IS ... and Bertold can check me on this, but I think that's what he was talking about.

cf cognitive therapy. Not a panacea, but it works for some.

Tell that to the sufferers of anxiety or depression for that matter. Just do something about it.

You can paint it with an existential brush same as i do and many others do but facts are we expire and all our efforts and travails are for naught. 

Frankie, your efforts and travails may be for naught. I see to it that my efforts and/or travails are not for naught. (How do you like that “not for naught”? [:>)]

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