I was a Doubting Thomas for just awhile today, almost a backslider.  Truth of the matter is I came within a hair's breath of taking up religion.  It happened whilst I was making a mad dash from one side of the plant to the men's room on the other.  For just a second there I almost cried out, "LORD, LORD!!  I'LL BE YOUR SERVANT FOREVER IF YOU'LL JUST LET ME MAKE IT TO THAT COMMODE BEFORE I SHIT MY PANTS!!"  However, I'm proud to say by shere force of will and character I did NOT succumb to that terrible temptation and I'm still an atheist!  I hope this testimony will inspire others to keep their unfaith. 

Views: 192

Reply to This

Replies to This Discussion

I never thought of that Steve, you are, of course, quite correct.
Right you are there Nerd, it just would not be ethical to make a deal with Satan and one with God too!!
Ethics, schmethics. Work both ends against the middle. Cut a deal with both of them. A good enough negotiator should be able to run both heaven and hell and kick out the old management.
The US tried that with Iraq and Iran (working both ends) during the Iraq-Iran War and it didn't work out so well.
Oh, sure, bring a real-world example to a theological discussion. Killjoy.
I like the way you think, Jason!
I've made a deal with Satan that my soul is his if he'll keep me out of heaven. I've also made a similar deal with God that I will never use a condom while having sex (that is what he values most right?) if he'll keep me out of hell. I think I'm set.
NO! NO! NO! Nerd I most definitely did not let the poop past that sphincter!
With you on that one. That first dump of the day - for a fraction of a second you are at one with the Universe.
shere force of will and character = The Cheeks Clamped Bathroom Two Step

It's the latest dance craze!
X: Do not covet your neighbours house, or hiis wife or his servans, or animals."


XI: Reuglar bowel movements are a divine blessing. Practice Kegel Squeezing religiously.
"And God said, Let there be shite:
and there was shite.
And God saw the shite, that it was good"


© 2018   Atheist Nexus. All rights reserved. Admin: The Nexus Group.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service