Joseph Langston said in another thread his religious relative accused him of "...just being angry with God." This prompted an idea. If it's been done here already... we can kill the thread.

Let's build a library of religious platitudes-- the dumbass hackneyed sayings Christians throw out like so much bullshit that it makes you laugh everytime you hear them.

Here is partial list drawn from actual experience / observation:

Basic death Platitudes for other Believers:
“Don’t be sad, Little Timmy is with Jesus now.”
“Just trust God.”
“God called little Bobby home.”
“Little Susie is in our prayers.”
“She’s in a better place now.”
“Jesus holds you in His loving arms during your hour
of grief.”
“I’ll offer blessings of comfort and strength.”
"God works in strange and mysterious ways."
"Who are we to know God's plan."
“I’ll pray for you.”

Proselytizing Platitudes:

“Just open your heart to Jesus.” (also known as the
“Stop Thinking!!” gambit)

“The proof of Him is all around you.”
“Jesus is my personal Lord and Savior let Him be yours
as well.”
“He died for your sins.”
“Why are you angry at God?” or "Why do you hate
“If a Christian hurt you at some time, I’m sorry.”
“You deny Him with your words, but you know that He
“The Lord loves you and He is quite capable to communicate
that to you and to cause you to believe, whether
you want to or not.”
“I’ll pray for you.”

Pissed off Platitudes:
“You’ll see the error of your ways when you standeth
before Him and tremble!”
“Every knee shall bend … you just wait!”
“Only a fool says there is no God! Thou art a Fool!!”
“If you don’t believe in God and Heaven, why don’t you
just kill yourself!?”
“I’ll enjoy watching you burn in Hell for eternity.”
"You're taking that scripture out of context!!"
"So what if you know the Bible, even Satan can spout scripture."
“I’ll pray for you.”

Anyone have any others/favorites to share?


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"Theists accuse atheists of being angry at God. Since atheists, by definition, do not believe God exists, how can they be mad at Him? But then again, since God, by definition, is invisible, then atheists are truly mad at nothing." ~Jae Baeli



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