Hello Members:

During loss and tragedy, theists will often say "you are in my thoughts and prayers" to express their support and compassion. What is a good expression for an atheist? Could it be "you are in my heart and mind"? What expression do you use to share your support and compassion?

Thanks in advance for sharing. - Doug

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Doug, don't overload yourself, but try something like "I'm sorry. Is there anything I can do?"

Thank you, Tom.

Since prayer never did do anything I leave that part out of it and just say a version of all the rest. I'm not sure anyone is in my heart or mind unless I love them in some way.

"So sorry for your loss. You are in my thoughts often in this time of need." The grieving party does have needs at this time and they need support. I'm not sure that "prayer" offers any support. It only works for those who believe it, and prayer does not change things -- instead it changes you. I will not pretend to pray even to the benefit of the one grieving. What am I praying to?

I have a friend who prays for everyone that is sick and dying. He goes out of his way to tell me this, but they all die anyway. What is his point here? Maybe to show me how good he is. He thinks his god loves him but yet his prayers have no effect. He cannot see this the way that I do.

Good insight and guidance, Michael. Thank you.

Thank you, Qiana-Maieev.

I'm thinking of you. And I follow up with a phone call. Personal visit(s) if it's someone close to me.

Doug, think empathy and the brain circuits that make it possible.

Anything short of actual help or a genuine offer to help keeps the empathy circuits free of "noise".

A belief in reincarnation keeps the empathy circuits free of noise by letting people say "If they behave, their future lives will be better.

Some versions of xianity keep the empathy circuits free of noise by letting people say "They must have sinned."

Good insight, Tom.

"I am sorry." "What can I do to help?" "Do you need anything right now?" 

I don't say all of these at the same time, depending what I am able and willing to do. 

Thanks for sharing, Joan. Helpful.

Thank you, Tom.
Thank you, Tom.

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