Ok, so due to my inability to lower my standards, I have unwittingly dedicated myself to becoming an atheist nun....(kidding, but that's the way it's turning out). So I live in the buckle of the bible belt, I'm educated, attractive for my age, own my own business, and mindless sex is just so easy (and boring) for us....isn't it ladies??? (You guys know that's true) But finding someone you actually WANT to be with, now that is where things get good and complicated!! I've decided in my wisdom, that I will not settle. Since MOST atheists live far far away from me, it never really occurred to me to try and find a man that could keep up with me intellectually on this site, but what did occur to me, was that I would meet awesome people who are intelligent, well spoken, educated, (whether self taught or schooled), witty and socially aware. I have hit the mother load there!!! This site helps me hold on to the fact that there are growing numbers of people just like me out there and I am not alone!! Rational, kind, and well spoken non-believers! I LOVE yall people....!!! (no but really, I do! That's a facetious southern accent btw and yeah, I am a southern girl and lovin there are so many talking atheists on this site!!!)
Now that being said....it can be a lonely life. But I just can't, and won't settle. You feel me?

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We are the same age and I also have problems with not knowing what to do when it comes to relationship.  I never married and do not desire to marry because I have problems with what it is.  Marriage is no solution to relationship.  Relationship is much more complex than a social portrayal of relationship.  The desire to be with the opposite sex is ever present though.  A relationship with the opposite sex has its benefits as it goes with sexual safety and personal behavior.  The ability to finance the relationship is tricky as well because there is no guarantee that the relationship will last and you need to continually look after yourself in order to actually survive.  Dolphins kinda just fuck on the fly, but yeah we are not dolphins.  One of the major concerns for us atheists is how society does not support our concerns.  Having less support in our daily activities gives us a differnent kind of challenge than the general public.  Going forward and looking ahead is full of obsticals that challenges our civil rights.  The U.S. government is at battle with its self in terms of government size and free interprise.  Government should not be a dictatorship and it should not be idle when its tax paying citizens are suffering.  With a growing population and a lagging sense of environmental support we need to learn how to live small and work as a team to support our needs.  I believe it is possible to live with the people we have and not destroy ourselves in the mean time but it involves design and leadership.  I just hope I can use it before I lose it.

Yeah, I wanna use it before I lose it too......and I will most probably never get married again.  Shacking up sounds good....


If you don't have one person who is dependent upon the other, financially, and you're not planning on children, I don't see the point of marriage, myself.  There's an argument to be made about grabbing the financial and legal benefits given to married couples in this country, but I'm speaking from a social perspective here.
I get tired of women mentioning how mindless sex is so easy to come by. It's a little insulting to those of us that choose to be celibate until think you have a worthwhile relationship, it demeans the act knowing that you might just be an easy lay.
I think MY point is, that I AM celibate because I CHOOSE to be.  That I could have mindless sex if that was what I wanted, but it's NOT, hence I am in the nunnery.  Any girl that is remotely cute, can get mindless sex, if that is what she wants.  Those of us here, aren't into that kinda thing.  I think that is the point of this thread.  Does that make sense?

  I guess I'm just jealous. My wife left a over a year ago, we still talk and she tells me how great her sex life is. I have none because I choose to wait for a relationship, but even if I was a male slut I don't think my past year would have been any different.


Oh, I get it Phil.....I've been right where you are, except my ex husband didn't wait til we were divorced to start his male whore sex life and is still shocked I walked away because they didn't mean anything.  First thing you need to do, is tell your ex that you don't care to discuss sex with her, and if it keeps fucking you up, maybe you should just not talk to her at all.  It seems harsh, but at some point, you need to let go of any connection with her, so you can heal and move on.  I know this from personal experience.  I finally put a stop to talking to the ex.  I was immediately in a better place.  If she cares for you at all, she will understand.  Best of luck!!!  Sorry you are in the order of celibate atheists, but you are in good company!

I'm good, long story. She moved to South Carolina so my youngest daughter could get in state tuition. A few weeks later she called and and said she wasn't coming back. It's clear now that she left with that intention. It doesn't fuck me up a bit. I was Ok with things until after a year, a few weeks ago, my daughters opened up and talked about it. They they refer to her as psycho bitch tramp, their own mother.  I'm just torn between being celibate and what really makes a good life. Maybe I'm doing it wrong. I don't think so. But mistakes are always hindsight.
If they'd been living with you instead, they'd be bitching to her about you being psycho dad, that's just how teens in split families are.
Wow.....you GOTTA wonder what's behind those comments by your daughters!  I would never ask you to say just what, but did you ever find out?  Also are you saying that you would be happier going out and having sex?   If you think so, then why not give it a shot??  I mean, what have you got to lose?  If it doesn't indeed make you happier, then you won't have to worry about that, and you will know that you are doing the right thing.  Nothing wrong with checking out and even doing field research on your options.  For me, field research is done, and I know what I must do................  ;-/

How does casual sex demean sex???????????? I've had casual sex most of my life, I like it better than relationship sex. In relationships people take things for granted, with casual sex you can go full out and give it your all.

Casual sex is the glorification of sex, it's great, you really ought to try it :)

Hey I'm not ever going to say what's good for me should be good for you!  It's just not how I roll.  I've just found that for me, I have to share way more than casual sexual feelings with someone in order for it to be satisfying to me.  I have often envied those that can do the sex for sport thing!  Everyone is different and I don't think someone who enjoys casual sex is wrong in any way period.  I'm just saying, I'm 41 years old, and being with someone in that way for me, is about more than a sexual act, and there are many things that contribute to me having sexual feelings about a guy, and it's about way more than a physical attraction.  But again, that is only me.  I think if you enjoy it, you should go out and get your groove on!!!  Have fun, be safe....because we ALL know you won't go to hell ;)~


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