What do guys look for in a girl? I mean, what do you notice first? And what ultimately makes you fall for that one girl??

I ask for two reasons: 1) I am just curious...and 2) I am 32, a hardcore atheist, a scifi geek, sardonic, sarcastic, I quote from Monty Python, Doctor Who, and Family Guy and a few more; also I'm not very girly for a girl, have no prospects and am single beyond belief!! :) I'm anxious to hear what freethinking guys like you like in a girl..besides the obvious...nontheism and freethought!! ;)

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Well, it just happens I suppose? The problem is actually meeting someone you can make it happen with, I find that certain communities got a larger attraction of the people I could potentially find attractive, the problem is that you never know what you get... They may live very far away and that's annoying, but what can you do :(

Because I have so far only found one person IRL I did fall in love with... and that lasted less than 3 months :) And I also did feel a bit uncomfortable around him, I felt I did not do as myself because he was always so cool and wanted... I don't want to feel like that again, I want to feel I can be myself. With that said, he was a nice person and it did not occur to me until after we broke up what sacrefices he had done to be around with me more often.

So, so far I've had 2 relationships and one where I wish we could be more serious but due to our situations IRL... it is not quite possible. Frustrating for me, because this is the only relationship I feel could be somewhat serious (we've known each other for about 3 years now, and I basically fell in love with him the second week we spoke).

I acutally don't know if anything I said now helped, but it feels good to know I am not alone in feeling that dating is not the right way to meet people :) Some people just got it easier to click with others or keep a good conversation I think...
Yea, dating has become more of a meat-market, and superficial. I have had encounters with guys I've met online...but like you said, they are either too far away, or some other factor. And the one I did meet turned out to be an arrogant ass who thought he was better than everyone. I guess I am hoping to find someone from one of my classes, or something like that. Thanks for the insight. :)
Hahaha!...Thank you for your comment!! I'm not a fan of House...but I really hope to find Doctor Who!! Awesome response by the way--very honest.I just don't want a moron!! Honestly, I've had my share of them!!
Nah, I never said that either. And I don't know you, I cannot judge you. But your response itself is pretty moronic, considering that I was merely trying to give my PoV on the questions that were raised.
I've never looked into online dating myself, for obvious reasons. I have known some folks who did and were happy with the results. You've looked at didn't like it; that's fine. Sounds like you've got some good ideas where to look.

Personally I think you've got a great combination of attributes. 'Scifi fan, sarcastic, quote from Monty Python (my whole family does this BTW), not very girly.' all sound great. And I did see your pics. As someone else said in this discussion, you get noticed.

BTW, the gal who caught my eye permanently loves classic literature, got her PhD in physics, has an IQ higher than mine, speaks 3 languages fluently, likes scifi, loves Monty Python and Fawlty Towers, and happens to also be gorgeous. Yep, smart girls are hot stuff IMO.
Wow!! PhD in physics!!! Brilliance is hot!! Thanks guys, for the compliments.
I haven't heard of anyone having success on one of those online dating sites like Match.com or eHarmony. I don't think eHarmony accepts atheists, anyhow. OKCupid is free and one can search for atheists and agnostics. It's a dating and social networking site. I've made a couple of friends, and a couple of my best pals have met their future spouses there.
I personally know someone who met someone awesome on OKCupid...and they are sweet and happy!! I might give it a try....
First are looks! I don't know any way around it, different guys look at different features, I know women do the same thing. Once that first attraction is made, then it all depends on the person. Your strength, your confidence, intelligence, and especially what you call " geekiness", (I call it that too) , would be the first personality traits, and interests that would attract me. As Wendi would tell you those three thing would have me very intrested in spending more time with you. She would also tell you that I'm a big kid so the nurturing, mama side of you would also be important.
As people get more intimate other concerns arise or you find you are in complete agreement. Wendi and I were not a perfect match at first, but close enough that we became inseparable.
I have seen your pixs I promise you guys notice you in your day to day life. You see one that strikes our fancy with a naked ring finger, strike up the small talk, at the very least he will appreciate the attention, almost guaranteed. Your not gonna look like a moron or desperate, your to witty for that, and your too good lookin for that. So be bold! :-)
Haha..thanks SGecko!! I feel bold already!! I do need someone I can be my geeky self around!! Good advice...and I agree...looks are obviously the first thing one notices.
I know women do the same thing.

Yeah, some do. I know a lot who don't. I met my cohabi-tater on an email list. We didn't exchange photos before we met. I'd fallen in love with his compassion, intelligence, wit, and rationality before we even met. He could have been misrepresenting himself, but thankfully he wasn't.

Being able to carry a good conversation carries a lot more weight with me than looks. In the long run, what's even more important (if you want to cohabit) is finding someone who will help you when you're sick, and its coming out both ends.
Yes, liars and cheats are not for me. I have had too much of that. Honesty and humour-very important. In fact, humour, for me, is key. I need to be able to laugh. Though, I do like intensity and a bit of darkness as well. Thanx Chris!



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