All of my past relationships were with religious people, and I know in the back of my mind it always bothered me.

Now Im wondering if there will ever be a chance that if I give up and date another religious guy, would there be a way that I could make it work?


"Love" can only be a good excuse for so long.


I was wondering if anyone else is wondering the same thing?


Do you care if your person of intrest is religious or Atheist?

 and why?





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Replies to This Discussion

All I can say is you're very optmistic :)
I don't compartmentalise myself, and I expect it even less from religious people.

Wait, you expect it less from religious people? Did you mean you accept it less from them? I expect all sorts of compartmentalization and lies from religious types. I know so many who act one way in church and while voting, and then turn around and live their life outside of church in a completely different manner.

I think the active, evangelical fundies compartmentalize less, but the average member of the flock has it down to an art form.
What they do and what I expect are two different realities. I expect an honest person to NOT compartmenlise, and since religious people 'claim' honesty, on that grounds, I'd expect to not compartmentalise. Of course I realise many do.

Thing is tho, it is one thing to pick thru your own brain and compartmenlise, it's a whole other thing to tell somebody else what THEY should compartmentalise...

I really hope I don't compartmentalise on too many things, tho I realise it's inevitable to a point, it's really not a trait I admire. So to ask it of anyone else would be non-sensical.
I agree that compartmentalizing is not a rational thing to do and therefore should not be done or expected, however, you cannot apply a rational principle to an irrational thing, hence, faith. I would personally seek to encourage compartmentalization in religious people, because I know it will sow cognitive dissonance and possibly lead them in the direction of renouncing their faith eventually, or at least will keep their religious beliefs off of their ballot, which I think is priority number one. I know personally that compartmentalization was involved in my own apostasy, with me starting out as a full on Christian self-proclaimed right-wing theocrat, eventually forsaking my theocraticism when I became a libertarian, thus compartmentalizing, and, when I realized I was living an impossible principle, reconciling my compartmentalization by choosing reason and renouncing my faith.
That's an interesting perspective I had not thought of, maybe because as a third generation atheist, it's never been an issue.

On a global scale, slightly machiavelic, but then again, in issues of war Machiavel was very wise. :)
All of the women I've ever dated merely paid lip service to religion, they weren't actively religious so it wasn't such a big deal. In that sense I don't date "religious" women if we're defining religious in the sense that religion is an important and ongoing issue in their lives.
What if you were to get serious with one of those ladies? Do you think that when the thought of getting married or having kids would have made her want to convert or change your opinions in religious views?
I've had four long-term relationships with women who were religious. While, ultimately, all of them ended in breakups, it was notable that religious differences were the least of all the issues we had.

While it would certainly be nice to find a woman who is non-religious, frankly, I now consider having similar political and personal values to be of more importance. Of course, none of the women were particularly devout, and I don't tend to try to push my views on anyone, so maybe that was why it never got beyond the "vigorous debate" stage.
I would love to know how this works out for you! Does he know that you are an atheist?
Hi, Tabi: I'm new (as of today!) to the singles group. I recently broke up with a guy who was SDA. We were together for several months and never really talked about religion (I think neither of us wanted to for fear it would mess things up--which it eventually did!) One day we were talking on the phone and he made a comment about Carbon 14 dating being so inaccurate. I could feel the hair on the back of my neck prickling and I blurted out "please don't tell me you believe in that "young Earth" stuff!" Well, he did. We actually talked for over an hour (it felt like a verbal sword fight.) Every idiotic thing he said, e.g. the Earth is only 6000 years old, dinosaurs lived alongside humans, even that Noah TOOK DINOSAURS ONTO THE ARK, I was able to discredit with science and reason. But here's the weirdest part: I knew passages and facts (yeah "facts") from the Bible that even he didn't know. He kept asking "where is that in the Bible?" And when I told him he said he would have to look that up. He was especially blown away when I told him there were even unicorns, satyrs and cockatrices (half snake, half chicken) in there. But the worst part was when I asked him if he knew about the SDA's (now denied) belief that "black/darker" skinned people are the result of God's "chosen white people" having sex with apes. (FYI, this is called "Amalgamation." It's sick, racist and REAL according to old SDA writings.) He just couldn't believe it. Anyway, I knew after that conversation I could never look at him the same again. He is a very sweet guy, but the depth of his chosen ignorance was more than I could handle. I hurt me deeply to leave him, and maybe that makes me a bigot in some ways, but I knew we would never be able to have the kind of intellectual depth I was hoping for. In our own ways, we were just too extreme.
There was an interesting study that came out recently, that compared various religions to determine which ones' adherents were the most knowledgeable about religion. Here's a link to the study: Click here

It turns out that atheists and agnostics are the most religiously knowledgeable. (Does this surprise anyone, here? I thought not.) Jews were in second place, followed by Mormons, then various other varieties of Christians.

I've always noted a rough correlation between intelligence and lack of faith. So your experience doesn't surprise me a bit, sad to say.
Hi, Michael. I too saw that study. I've even taken similar tests and (not to brag) I kicked ass. (LOL, the "Bible" category on Jeopardy is usually a slam dunk for me!) I mentioned in another post that I'm reading "God Hates You, Hate Him Back" by CJ Werleman. He takes every book of the Bible, picks out the main points (typically racist, genocidal, murderous, etc) and comments (he has a marvelous "Australian" sense of humor!) This is a great, quick reference book for discussions with believers on their "good" book.

Question of the day: When did "Stupid" become a religion?


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