Testosterone And Demisexuality
I just discovered the concept of what is called 'Demisexuality'.
Demisexuals are asexuals who only experience secondary sexual attraction to people they know personally, usually based on some kind of emotional connection, whether platonic or romantic. They can’t feel sexually attracted to strangers, celebrities, or people they don’t very well. So demisexuality is all about sexual attraction, just like asexuality is all about the lack of sexual attraction.
My first reaction was to be very pleased. I have finally found a label for what I am looking for in a man.
(And I am still hoping, that a man, who identifies with this description and is an AN member in my age group will contact me.)
But on second thought I am wondering, about other possible interpretations of this part of the definition.
"sexual attraction to people they know personally, usually based on some kind of emotional connection, whether platonic or romantic. They can’t feel sexually attracted to strangers, celebrities, or people they don’t very well."
Demi as French for 'half' implies a reduction. I have my doubts, that such a distinction between primary and secondary sexual attraction is enough to justify the priority of one over the other as a deficit. I am even reluctant to call one primary and the other secondary.
Considering the complex human brain and the power of human cognition, I have doubts, that something triggered by cognition rather than by instinctive subconscious reactions is really less or secondary. I see alternative input channels for the stimulation of instinctive behavior only as differences.
Demisexuality it a fairly new concept and I found no scientific information on google concerning my dissenting perception.
Due to the general function of testosterone, it seems very probable, that an asexual man has a lower testosterone level than a promiscuous jerk.
But to define demisexuality as either a reduction or not, an indication for an answer could be found by a comparison of the testosterone level of demisexual men and of men, who are monogamous by a conscious moral decision of consideration and responsibility.
Does anybody know anything more?
This is the science forum... Has anybody any serious information concerning studies on the testosterone levels?
This was the best study I could find:
Although it found no statistically difference in testosterone, it found that effeminate gay men had on average higher level of FSH (follicle stimulating hormone, p value < .01). In gay men, total testosterone (590 +/- 148 ng/100 ml) was actually slightly higher but within the margin of error when compared to straight men (562 +/- 126 ng/100 ml).
> My first reaction was to be very pleased. I have finally found a label for what I am looking for in a man.
> (And I am still hoping, that a man, who identifies with this description and is an AN member in my age group will contact me.)
Here is a reddit post for demisexual men:
"Once that mental distinction became apparent, I started masturbating in a habit similar to brushing my teeth; with my need to ejaculate taken care of (see: hormone regulation, prostate & testicular health), I found my desire/need to have intercourse dropped to 2-4 times per year, while my desire to cuddle or be affectionate remained constant (~3x week)"
Also note that "Demisexuals are asexuals", meaning that they are a subtype of asexuals. You can read about an asexual man here:
Now, given that you know what an asexual man is - that they cannot be aroused by the female body via its appearance or smell or erotica or anything like that - do you really want to get phone calls from asexual men? Because it sound like you want someone who will never feel physical attraction towards you the way straight men do.
> Due to the general function of testosterone, it seems very probable, that an asexual man has a lower testosterone level than a promiscuous jerk.
Uhh... have you ever read a study on the relationship between total testosterone levels and sexual orientation? Because as far as I am concerned, none has ever been found. Just because a man is asexual or asexual hetero-romantic or demisexual or an asexual man who dates women doesn't mean that his body doesn't work. He still gets an erection when he wakes up in the morning. All the hormones are still there. You can't change a man from gay to straight by giving him testosterone shots in the same way you can't change a man from asexual to heterosexual by giving him testosterone shots. Asexuality is a full blown sexual orientation and as your definition put it, "Demisexuals are asexuals".
p.s. Not all promiscuous people are mean.