The cost of masculine crime

"Men are, by a huge margin, the sex responsible for violent, sexual and other serious crime. The economic cost of this ‘masculine excess’ in delinquency is staggering - to say nothing of its emotional toll. Why is the social shaping of masculinity not an urgent policy issue?"

Don't give me the old bromide that testosterone did it! That is an excuse! A denial of self-responsibility! A claim that protects violent men from being held accountable. Both men and women suffer because of these brutes! 

 

"Of the one-third of a million people in England and Wales found guilty of an indictable offence in the 12 months ending June 2012, 85% were men. The more violent the crime, the more men predominate. From a unique table deep in the quarterly Ministry of Justice Criminal Justice Statistics Bulletin for England and Wales we learn that males were 88% of those found guilty of violence against the person, and more than 98% of those committing sexual offences."

Just as the women of Turkey, dressed from head to toe in heavy gabardine in 100 degree F weather, to conceal their bodies because men couldn't control their impulses to rape, so, men of many countries continue to think they are entitled to use and abuse women. Doesn't that sound sophomoric to you? How can anyone claim they can't control their natural urges? If men were subject to such impulses, doesn't that imply those who can't exist as less human than the gentler ones? More like beasts than Homo sapiens. 

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The statistics on serious domestic violence - going to the hospital because of domestic violence - are skewed about 6 to 1, women to men.  See http://www.xyonline.net/sites/default/files/Kimmel,%20Gender%20symm...

What I said is accurate, according to this article. 

Also, far more men than women kill their spouses. 

The idea that violence done by women to men is underreported is not supported by evidence, according to this article. 

In response to the notion that men would be too ashamed or humiliated to call the police or go to the hospital if they were beaten by their wives, available empirical evidence suggests a very different picture: Men who are assaulted by intimates are actually more likely to call the police, more likely to press charges, and less likely to drop them.

Well it's been a while since I read her books and I want to be careful not to misrepresent her. But Pizzey described how as part of caring for these abused women and children she discovered that there was just as many men but that they didn't have a place.

As a feminist who was trying to make real change in the world, she opened a shelter for men. This  was apparently very unpopular to the point where after a series of threats and her family dog was killed she fled with her family to Canada. 

Obviously there are shelters for men and boys. But the ratio is closer to 1:100 than 1:6. And I wonder why this is - I do not believe that everyone wanting to open a male shelter is being threatened, but perhaps there it isn't as easy to get funding.

Obviously there are shelters for men and boys. But the ratio is closer to 1:100 than 1:6.

Battered women's shelters are emergency housing and often unpleasant places to stay.  They are a last resort for women who can't afford a better place.  A hotel room is a much nicer escape. 

Men have more money to buy a hotel room if they need to get away.  The women tend to be dependent, unpaid workers at home without access to much money.  Probably especially true of battered women. 

A woman hitting a man is a lot less likely to do serious damage, because of less average strength.

That's true, Luara, and a Sacramento woman knew it.

She went to prison for poisoning several men.

Ted, I have no doubt that women abuse men, physically, mentally and emotionally. Men tend to use physical power, women tend to use verbal power. Both can be abusive and the emotional damage can be devastating. That said, violence of any sort in a family is a symptom of dysfunction. It doesn't define what is not working, but something in the relationship is not working to create effective and efficient team work. 

I've told the story before of my experience at a boys ranch, when, after training of the boy, mother and father in problem solving and conflict resolution, the mother felt she was loosing control. She shot her husband in full view of their son. Blood splattered everywhere. Fortunately, the bullet didn't hit any vital organs, but it surely struck a rich blood supply. 

The father realized he was dealing with more than anger, he was dealing with mental illness. He and the son left the home and created a new life that was healthy for both of them. They had no control over her, and he filed an assault charge against her; the court dealt with her situation. 

I find no fault with the Swedish study. 

"The concept that women use violence only in self-defense is not true – women are capable of using it aggressively as well."

"behaviour ranging from punching, kicking and pushing to strangleholds and threats at gunpoint."

"between 8 and 11 percent of male victims reported that they had also been perpetrators of violence

"We do not know in detail what led women to use violence in aggression," she explained.

"More women (30 percent) than men still reported that they had acted in self-defense,

"men were most likely to maintain that they had reacted to insults or humiliation."

"female victims of domestic violence suffered from more severe health effects than men"

"women were more likely to report depression, anxiety and difficulty sleeping.

"Ten percent also reported experiencing suicidal thoughts"

"Because men are often bigger and stronger, they do not feel as threatened by physical violence on the part of their female partners"

"Women were also more likely than men to have been the victims of sexual abuse"

"with 10 percent of women reporting they'd been sexually abused by their partner, compared to 3.5 percent for men."

In my research, "Toward a Theory of Family Violence, its antecedents, treatment and prevention", I looked at the role of violence when faced with problems and conflicts. By learning how to manage anger, use life skills and effective communication, violence was reduced and partners claimed to have happier lives with less tension and reduced urges to violence. 

Joan, after becoming an atheist, I've become much more aware of the evil that's been perpetrated on many women by many men.  

The few years I spend talking to people on the site "Life After Mormonism" started opening my eyes, especially about how bad Mormonism is to women.  It's bad for all genders, but especially non-straight people, and women more than men.

Atheist Nexus has opened my eyes to the problem much more, and you have been the one that's opened them the widest Joan.  

Let me be very clear, I value the different qualities of maleness and femaleness. Males do not have to become more feminine, their strength lies in their union with females. Females do not have to become more masculine, their strength lies in their union with males. Violence is the destroyer of union. That is also true between parent and child. Violence has no place in the family scene. 

OK! Now the task is to figure out how to build a community of strong men and women who can take on the weapons and attitudes of those who hate heretics.  

We have evidence on our side, we know the difference between reality and delusion, clearly, society does not prosper under the yoke of religion. If we are to survive the economic, social, political turmoil, we need well trained communicators and advocates for reason and evidence based knowledge. 

Have you seen the insane stories of radical conservatives who are doing dumb things like creating cars and trucks that spew out black diesel smoke? They are self-righteous, opinionated, arrogant idiots that attract uninformed people, young and old. 

What strategies can we develop to counteract such nonsense (and I mean non + sense)?

How do we counter the "Let go and let god" mentality? 

How do we challenge the 6,000 year old Earth beliefs? 

Using Socratic questions, such as

Does hitting your spouse or child make your home a place you enjoy living in? 

Are there other methods of livings? 

What price do you pay for being violent? 

Who benefits by the use of violence? 

Why has Israel and Palestine not been able to settle their disputes when people all over the world pray for the end of their wars? 

What role does the US play in supplying arms?

Who is going to take care of the refugees? 

Do you think violence solves conflicts? 

Why do men and women use violence?

Does violence get you want you wan?. 

When I worked at the boys' ranches, about a third of the parents used punitive methods and the boys acted out. About a third of the parents set too few boundaries and boys had no structure. About a third of the parents used sound parenting methods and the boys got into rebellious influences of peers. 

The remedy was to use methods that focused on self-responsibility and self-control. For some boys, a points system worked. We put a new boy into very tight controls and showed him the way to get more freedom. When they earned the methods of problem solving and conflict resolution, as well assertiveness, negotiation, compromise, and demonstrated progressive use of these strategies, they had more and more freedom, until they earned their out of the ranch and back to their families who had also been trained.  Both parents and boys learned life-skills and their lives improved. 

Violence has no place in the family or anywhere else.

After I retired, on my first day in a ceramics class at a city college students introduced themselves and I said I had been in the Navy.

A woman in the class asked why I hadn't joined the Army.

I replied that I hadn't wanted to look at the men I would have to kill.

Several voices that sounded like those of women gasped.

I'm glad that the military now puts women into combat positions.

I agree, if there are to be people in combat, they need to include women who have the qualifications. My preference is that because we have a War College, we need a Peace College.  

( still reading all the posts I never came round to )

A society with less crime also has less religion, less tradition and less inequality between the sexes. We can start from there....

Your new freedom feels good to me, as I am sure it feels great to you! What is your summer weather doing; normal patterns or different from the usual? 

We had the hottest day for July last week and it was blistering. It reached 101 degree F, not at all usual for July. August is usually our hottest month. 

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