I've been to wedding ceremonies where the couple light a unity candle from their two separate candles. It makes a HUGE difference in the symbolism whether the individuals' candles are extinguished or left lit.
(BTW, spouses sincerely complimenting each other doesn't hurt a relationship either! :-)
Wow. My first wife wanted a candle-lighting as a part of the ceremony ... with the two individual tallows EXTINGUISHED after. I waved that off, even as unresolved as I was back then ... and I'm not sorry.
I shouldn't have to change or lose myself because of a relationship with someone else ... and THEY shouldn't have to change for me!
A relationship and "love" is a decission. Your choice will remain but emotions change.