I was originally going to post this in the military atheists group, but I felt that there were parts of this that non-military people would find humorous too.
Today at work I had to fill out several forms for medical care, as we often do when transferring from one place to another. One of the columns listed "religious preference" where I simply wrote NONE. The medical staff member there, upon reading my form was shocked when she read this part. She was like "If you don't list a religion here, we won't know how to treat your corpse when you die."
This made me chuckle, so I simply said to her, "I'm a sailor, if I die, bury me at sea." To this she said, "Well some people have problems with cremation, and blah, blah, blah..." You get the gist. So I finally looked at her and said honestly, "We if the Christians are right, I'll have plenty of time to burn after I die." Then I left her office.