I live in a very religious town, so I hear this saying about 2 or 3 times every week, whether it be to me or someone near me.  I usually don't respond when it is said to me, but what do you think a good response would be?

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May the force (or the schwartz for Spaceballs fans)  be with you.


Or in honor of Leonard Nimoy's 80th birthday, give the Vulcan sign and say "live long and prosper."  If that doesn't get them to redirect, try a Vulcan neck pinch.


I had a friend who always said Lenny Lives! (meaning Lenny Karvitz)

I love Jesus too, but in a gay way.

w/o humans god(s) would never exist

jesus (whatever son from whatever creatoin myth story fable) was a martyr painted with a broad brush and even had parts of his life written into books surely authored by what whould be considered violent criminals today. and along came education and communications;


perhaps a perhaps too complex comeback could be

"Jesus loves me? So I can love you back; an atheist loving a christian; you sure you wanna go there?

When do I push on you 'come to the atheist meetup w/me?'"


I wonder how many folks realize when their pockets are getting picked or actual criminals are within the pews watching and waiting; networking. for jesus/god/money dugh.


they must really fear or hate this site; the hurt, maybe dangerous, looking for love, kind of bad people.

push on.

"Are you telling me that a DEAD guy loves me, and that you love him too? Well, I don't. Because that's called necrophillia."

I just had this happen to me.

I replied (my first gut response),

"I have no idea you're talking about."

You guys had some better ones, but I just wanted to share.

oops meant to say:

"I have no idea what you're talking about"

It was off the top of my head...

I'd hope for a funnier less mean sounding reply if it happens again.

I would just give them a weird look. Not sure what to say to that one. I'll read the replies for some ideas.

I should have said, "Oh he says that to all the girls."

  1. Oh, did you say, "Jesus loves shoes?"
  2. There's nothing sadder than unrequited love.
  3. Well, why doesn't he call?
  4. Yeah, but he hates critical thinking.
  5. The last time I had a third party informed me of someone else's love was 7th grade.
  6. I KNOW! I'm going to have to take out a restraining order if he doesn't leave me the fuck alone!

Jesus loves you, or is it just gas?

Jesus who?

He doesn't call, he doesn't write,
I think he jerk me 'round for spite!


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