Whether I should try and protect a friend or mind my own business??

We all know internet scams are here to stay. I think most of us, on this site anyway, can spot one easily enough. Which brings me to this. A friend of mine friended a man on Facebook. 'Sam' said he was in the army, has an eight year old son that his mother is keeping while he's stationed in Africa, and that he will retire in September. With full benefits of course and a ranch/business he owns in Texas. 'Karen' isn't a stupid woman but she is lonely and bored. She has one grown son and the same job that she started after high school.
When she told me about him she told me that every one had warned her it was a scam. So I just told her to be careful.
Fast forward two weeks. Now his son has been in a tragic accident and Sam needs two thousand dollars to pay the hospital or his son will be discharged. I hate to see her get ripped off but she's not asked for my opinion and I haven't​ offered it.

If any of you were in this position what would you do?? Would you volunteer your opinion or just keep quiet??

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In a nutshell, I would want to protect my friend from getting scammed, so I would voluntarily get involved.  After all, what are friends for?  At the very least, bring up skeptical questions for your friend to consider before making any decision.  At bare minimum, you will have done your part.  If you do nothing and your friend gets scammed, you may always regret not speaking up.  Good luck with your situation.    

I agree with Carl, too!

What Carl said.

Thanks, Thomas, for the two excellent scammer articles, I bookmarked them. 

I agree with everyone else.  They prey off women like her.  They have tried many times with me.  I can see their brains explode into tiny pieces when they realize I am not going to give them what they want.

I agree with all of you. But I'm not sure how to broach the subject. Like I said everyone else has warned her it's a scam and she won't listen to them. I'll try to feel her out and see if she's suspicious since he has already asked for money.


Taking a hint on "but she is lonely and bored. She has one grown son and the same job that she started after high school." sounds like she needs some new change. How introducing her to another guy, but this time in the flesh?... or introduce her to Atheist Nexus?

  There were a couple of times in my past where my friends tried to talk me out of stagnant and dysfunctional relationship only to get a nasty "None of your damn business " reply followed by resentment and anger. But as time goes on ( a year or more) I realized they were only looking out for me AND her. I am closer to my friends now than I thought possible and I am glad they spoke up. I guess what I am trying to say that at the risk of losing a friend it is worth to speak up to save someone from further grief..... did I say that right?

Thomas, you said it perfectly!

 I was a correctional officer for 15 years. My motto became "If you think you can't be conned you will be". In other words never let your guard down.   The best way to tell it is a con is it comes from the best, most trustworthy person. All the evidence directly show that this person is the "real deal".  Another saying I have is " No one was ever conned by an asshole". My point is the more believable it is the more likely it is a con, otherwise it would not work.    If someone needs charity and the details seem somewhat shady when I hear the story the more inclined i am to think it is legit. People always have secrets, embarrassing, or stupid things they have done that they don't wish to admit. 

  If EVERYTHING seems right my "condar" goes berserk! I would tell my friend what I have just said. 

 Compelledunbeliever, I worked as a teacher of Life Skills in a county prison for two years and those inmates know how to manipulate others, bigtime. Infact, prison is a school for learning to scam. 

Coming at the situation as a teacher, some will never reform, I know that and the warden and guards know that. Some will not want to change and they just might recall the lessons taught at a later time in their life. Some do not want to and are not willing to listen.  

 As harsh as I have sounded here I am very pleased you did indeed use the term "some". I may prefer the term "most" however the term "all" would not be appropriate in any case. This I believe is a vital distinction to make.




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