If you replaced your pacifier with the Bible, you might be a Christian.

If you think Fox News is balanced journalism, you might be a Christian.

I you have seen His holy likeness in a potato chip...

If you offer to pray for a friend rather than actually helping em...

If you've thought "Well that makes a lot of sense" while listening to Rush...

If you would rather your children live in guilt and shame because they are human...

If you respect someone with the nacissistic need to be worshiped...

 

 

Ahhh, mine suck. You guys give it a crack!

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Replies to This Discussion

I love this one and the one above. It really cracks me up when spirituality is juxtaposed with suburban banality.

I've been to rural areas in at least fifteen different states where I've seen a sign or billboard that shared these two messages:

Jesus Saves! and Guns and Ammo
If you feel that you are in a minority and that the whole of western society is set up for godless atheists, when in fact it's actually pretty much thoroughly and completely set up for you, you might be Christian.

This one is actually a friend and her son...

If your 7 year old son dreams he is having conversations with Jesus and you not only encourage the belief that they are true and significant but *act on them* then you might be Christian.

If you get an atheist friend to stand up in church and agree to be a god parent to your child then you might be a Christian but then again to be honest you're probably agnostic in denial.


What's that about anyway? I'm a card carrying Atheist, well I would be if we approved of cards, but I've been asked twice to be a God parent by catholic friends. In both cases I've been asked not to talk to the child about atheism. I wonder if I'm allowed to teach them about Christianity? *GRIN* I suspect not.
I think of myself as their special friend. It would be great if there was a recognised relationship that didn't have God in the title. My daughter has no godparents which is a little sad but it's unavoidable as we have no god. :-).

She knows there are adults who love her because they are Mummy and Daddy's oldest friends and she calls some of our friends Auntie or Uncle which I suppose is similar, but a "godparent" is a recognised object and it would be nice to have a firm secular equivalent.

Maybe I'll start a fresh discussion about it soon and get some name options underway.
I think of myself as their special friend. (Does that require a short bus?)

My daughter's 'god' parents are two friends (one male, one female - unrelated) both gay - nothing to do with 'god'. Guess we didn't fight the title - seemed kind of ironic - especially with the whole unrelated homosexual thing. But they are truly wonderful people who would see to it that my daughter was taken care of in the unlikely (we hope) event that my ex and I should die at the same time or whatnot.

But yeah - it would be kinda better if there were another title for basically the same thing without the god part.
My godfather (picked by my grandfather) was a high level Mafiosa - what a godly man he was.
"Designated Guardian"? Doesn't have a nice poetic ring, but it might have legal status.
You might be a Christian if,

You think the President should place his hand on the bible rather than the Constitution during his inauguration.
If you think the use of logic in a debate is a way to "twist around your words"...

I actually saw this as a Christian post on another blog site
Damn that Aristotle!
If your evidence to disprove evolution is "there are no monkeys in America and Europe"...

Another actual post by a Christian genius
Those whacky Christians!
You have perfected the art of gossiping through prayer requests

Too many sixes in a number makes you nervous

You think, "Smile, Jesus loves you,” is a valid cure for depression

You don't understand why everyone can't see the truths in the bible as clearly as you can

You think that a one-world currency will lead to the rapture, but you still try to convince everyone to stay away from a one world currency

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