“Nonviolent Communication” Excerpts and Notes:

Author: Marshall B Rosenberg

Anger is a wake up call to my needs:


What am I needing and not getting?

Hearing a Difficult Message:

Unproductive to getting our needs met:

1. blame ourselves

2. blame others

More likely to get our needs met:

3. sense our own feelin...gs and needs

4. sense others’ feelings and needs

Expressing Anger:

1. Stop. Breathe.

2. Identify my judgmental thoughts.

… distinguish stimulus from cause…

3. Connect with my needs.

4. Express my feelings and unmet needs.

… “I feel angry because I need …”

Reflect Empathically:

1. observing

2. feeling

3. needing

4. requesting

Listen to what people are needing rather than what they are thinking

Anger emerges from:

• judgments

• labels

• thoughts of blame

• should / have to

• believing that someone deserves something

Practice translating each judgment into an unmet need

"Our objective is to establish relationships based on Honesty and Empathy"

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