Age 5 or 6:
The Bible lifts off of Jesus.
Jesus joins the local baseball team, Yahweh’s Fighters. He was the famous hitter.
Jesus hits a baseball into the local bakery in a game of stickball. Had to work there all summer to pay off the
Jesus gets into a fight at school with a short Mexican with the same
name as him. The Mexican kicked his ass.
Jesus found a strange plant while off with his friends. He and his friends decided to light it on
fire and they were all strangely hungry afterwards.
Jesus went through a rough patch and gained 150 pounds.
Jesus got in a back street brawl and came home with a black eye.
Jesus grows to 6 feet and starts to shave.
Jesus loses the extra weight to impress a girl at school, who still
didn’t go out with him.
Jesus meets a woman called ‘Sparkle’ and never forgets her.
Jesus ran away from home and joined a band called Smashing Crucifixes.
Jesus found that strange plant, learned that is was weed, and make a
killing in Bethlehem.
Jesus met ‘Sparkle’ and they went steady.
Jesus become rebellious and starts a political party calling for
Jesus is short on money and becomes a pimp.
Jesus celebrates his birthday by getting drunk.
Jesus got caught for pimping and was sent to jail. He learned not to drop the soap.
Jesus went to rehab for his drinking problem.
Jesus went back to jail and bailed out Paul.
Jesus, Simon Peter, James, John, Andrew, Philip, Thomas, Bartholomew,
Matthew, James, Simon Zelotes, Judas, and Judas Iscariot join together and make
a new band: The Apostles. They were the biggest hit of late night comedy
Jesus writes “I Fought The Law and The Law Won”. It flops.
Jesus is still pissed that it became famous 2,000 years later.
Age 27: Jesus
stops pimping and makes the women into groupies.
Jesus went to jail for sleeping with a girl who was 17.
Jesus and Judas get into a fist fight over ‘Sparkle’.
Jesus started to settle down with his crazy life.
‘Sparkle’ was killed out of jealously by Judas. Jesus had a return to his drinking.
Jesus packs up with his band and moves back to his home town.
The Bible picks back up on Jesus.
Creative. I still like Chris Moore's take on the missing years. But that may be because he spent a couple years on it which I'm guessing you didn't. :) I think you'd get some laughs out of his Lamb: The Gospel According to Bif Christ's Childhood Buddy.