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Atheist Humor

This is the place to post that hilarious irreligious YouTube video, an irreverent, anti-religious cartoon, or other humorous bit of media. Posts that do not reflect an atheist/irreligious theme will be deleted. (Don't make me go Old Testament.)

Members: 2081
Latest Activity: Jan 22

Lewis Black: The Flintstones is not a documentary.

A slightly longer version of the clip that used to be here. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LGrlWOhtj3g

Discussion Forum

The Book of Pure Truth

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Tom Sarbeck Aug 4, 2019. 4 Replies

The Atheist Pig Gets IN YOUR FACE!

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Patricia Jul 14, 2019. 1 Reply

How Do Court Reporters Keep Straight Faces?

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Patricia Jun 29, 2019. 2 Replies

Comment Wall

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Comment by Patricia on October 5, 2019 at 12:34pm

A Sunday School teacher wanted to use squirrels as an example of a diligent work ethic and being prepared. She started the lesson by saying, "I'm going to describe something, and I want you to raise your hand when you know what it is." The children were excited to show her what they knew and leaned forward eagerly.

"I'm thinking of something that lives in trees and eats nuts." No hands went up. "It can be gray or brown and it has a long bushy tail." The children looked around the room at each other, but still no one raised a hand.

"It chatters and sometimes it flips its tail when it's excited?"

Finally one little boy shyly raised his hand. The teacher breathed a sigh of relief and said, "Okay, Michael. What do you think it is?"

"Well," said the boy, "I know the answer's supposed to be Jesus, but it sure sounds like a squirrel to me.

Comment by Loren Miller on October 3, 2019 at 8:32am

I was digging through some OLD stuff this morning and came upon the following, which I believe was published in my college newspaper, somewhere around 50 years ago.  Ruth, you might get a kick out of this one, though I will admit, the humor is on the BLACK side:

Comment by Grinning Cat on October 1, 2019 at 12:55pm

Yup, never mind that an all-powerful, all-knowing deity (as the Jewish, Christian, and Islamic god(s) are usually imagined) would be just as much at fault for the hundreds of people killed!

I want God's PR staff for myself; all of the credit, none of the blame!

Comment by Patricia on October 1, 2019 at 12:52pm

Gravy is also good on some vegetables.

Comment by Patricia on October 1, 2019 at 12:52pm

Oh that's good, Loren.

Comment by Idaho Spud on October 1, 2019 at 11:55am

Hahaha.

Comment by Loren Miller on October 1, 2019 at 11:01am

And the next time there's this horrible tragedy involving the loss of hundreds of lives and you want to do something (without REALLY doing anything) about it, you can lay one of THESE on whoever survived or didn't:

Figure it out!  [grin!]

Comment by Loren Miller on October 1, 2019 at 10:19am

Put cheese sauce on the broccoli.  That'll fix it!

Comment by Idaho Spud on October 1, 2019 at 9:07am

That gave me a good chuckle, Patricia.

Comment by Patricia on September 30, 2019 at 12:40pm

A 4 year old boy was asked to give thanks before a big dinner. The family members bowed their heads in expectation. He began his prayer, thanking God for all his friends, naming them one by one. Then he thanked God for Mommy, Daddy, brother, sister, Grandma, Grandpa, and all his aunts and uncles.

Then he began to thank God for the food. He gave thanks for the turkey, the dressing, the fruit salad, the cranberry sauce, the pies, the cakes, even the Cool Whip. Then he paused, and everyone waited--and waited.

After a long silence, the young fellow looked up at his mother and asked, "If I thank God for the broccoli, won't he know that I'm lying?"

 

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