Vibrators and dildos stimulate probing questions for Alabama Supreme Court

"..the Supreme Court of Alabama this week upheld the constitutionality of an Alabama statute prohibiting the sale of 'any device designed ... primarily for the stimulation of human genital organs.' "

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does that mean we can't have washing machine's with a spin cycle anymore?
Apparently not...unless you purchase it in some other state and bring it home. As long as their own economy isn't "stimulated" you can ride that washing machine all night long.
That's just silly, my friend. The primary use of the spin cycle isn't for sexual stimulation. It's just a byproduct. Now, the gearshift from the car on blocks in the front yard is a much different story altogether! What other purpose does it serve, other than for sexual gratification?
Where does this leave bananas ? Because, obviously, they were designed.
And cucumbers. I'm sure Kirk Cameron would agree that a cucumber's shape can mean it was designed for one primary purpose.
I know for a fact that the Washington Monument was designed for the sole purpose of being a sex toy for the Nephilim of Genesis!
Does this mean they're not allowed to hawk their sisters at the local swap meet?
My fake iphone has a masturbate function. You click on a few buttons and the vibrate for calls comes on and stays on until you turn it off. It has different functions like buzzing all the time or intermittent buzzing. It's funny.
Even if you have a doctor"s note?
NO NO officer...this is a back massage device. It's slightly flexible so it can conform to the curves of the back. See? You try it.
Whoa! Graham crackers were invented to help "dampen sexual desire"?!? WTF? That is the best thing I've read all day!

Seriously though, this is one of those laws that just boggles the mind. Legislating morality is unavoidable because when it comes down to it, that's what out most important rules are about - we know it's wrong to kill people and steal because of our societal morals. But there has to be a line, and this is just ri-fucking-diculous. I would loooove to go there and test this law. And the products, I'll bring my own batteries, insert your own joke here.
I eat a ton of graham crackers and I can honestly say they do not "dampen sexual desire". Maybe it only works on theists....


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