I was just scanning some threads on some other atheist sites and one mentioning Santa Clause reminded me of something I was thinking about several days ago...

Santa Clause is just as real as God. Santa does live at the north pole. He has reindeer that fly him around the world in one night, and he delivers presents to all the good boys and girls.

The reason no one sees him or gets any presents is because he's a fundamentalist! That's right, he has one simple rule. You have to be good all the time all year long or you don't get squat. Since it's really unlikely that ANYONE can manage to be good 24/7/365, is it any wonder he doesn't make more house calls?

So be good for goodness sake. :-) Merry Christmas to all my fellow heathens!

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Hey! I'm good ALL the time. Of course, I suspect my rules are a bit different from Santa's, for instance, sex outside of marriage is GREAT!!! On the other hand I never cheated on my wife in 23 years, even though we lived in "sin" for the first 5 years.

Santa's mean!
Yep, he sure is every bit as real as any of the gods for which people are killed. Absolutely.


So if Santa is god - does that make his Reindeer the saints?


Can you imagine starting a fundamentalist church based on Santa? Communion with Christmas cookies and egg nog? Santa crucified on a Christmas tree not a cross? Santa's wife as the virgin Mary? Scandalous.




If you're up for some provocative blasphemy - you can check out my youtube channel here. I'm serving fresh doses of better uses for the bible and a glimpse into the Christian Music Worlds Hall of Shame:




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