Hi everyone,


I've been an Atheist Nexus member for awhile, but I've never posted anything before.  I'm an all-around addict... alcohol, pot, prescription drugs, and possibly biggest of all, food. 

 

I'm a nurse (which has given me lots of access to substances I don't need to be around), but I'm not working right now because I'm taking care of my mother, who is in poor health.  She requires 24 hour a day care, and I get no help from anyone else in her care.  My stress level is extremely high, and I'm craving every mind and mood altering substance I can think of.  To make it more difficult, my mother wants nothing but junk food and sugar, sugar, sugar. 

 

For me, eating sugary foods is just about as harmful as drinking.  Mom wanted  chocolate last week, and the bowl of candy on the kitchen counter might as well have been a bottle of Southern Comfort.  I have violent mood swings on sugar... alcohol "just" makes me suicidally depressed. 

 

Because I get no help with Mom, I rarely get to leave the house to do anything for myself.  I can leave occasionally for an hour or two, and my stress level and level of craving is bad enough that I'm actually considering going to a 12-step meeting a couple of times a week.

 

Years ago, before I realized that my discomfort with the whole "God" thing was due to the fact that I was an atheist, I used to go to a lot of 12-step meetings.  I have always had issues with the pushing of "God" in the 12 steps, but now I don't even know if I could stand it. 

 

I don't hide my atheism, but I also don't shout if from the rooftops.  Most of my friends and family know that I'm an atheist, and even the strong xtians among them are accepting and supportive of my beliefs.  I just don't know how the 12-step nazis would handle it.  I'm not sure I'd even be welcome. 

 

I just don't know what to do.  I need to get out of the house.  I need to be around some people besides my Mom.  And I need to have some support in my (what is right now very fragile) recovery from my addictions.  But I don't want a god I don't believe in shoved down my throat.  I don't want someone telling me that I can't stay sober without "God."

 

I don't know what to do.

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Replies to This Discussion

Hi I have problems with alcohol too so I'm in the same boat as you. I hope we can learn a lot from each other. It's hard for me to post in groups and I've mostly been a lurker on this site.

Is it possible to get some help from hospice or a home health agency for you mom?  You shouldn't have to take care of her 24/7.  You need time for yourself too.  I wish you luck in finding a local group that does not force religion into its recovery program. 

I have an eating disorder (30+ years now) and OA has been the only group of humans I have found that help me.  Unfortunately I am having serious trouble with the God/HP talk. 

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