Ok, this isn't a take-off on a previous discussion, here. It's just that I'm really beginning to get a bit concerned. It seems to be in style these days to declare that one does not want children, and quite frankly, I'm finding it rather depressing. I've always wanted to get married and have a family, and it seems my chances are getting steadily thinner. There just seems to be so much hostility around; merely mentioning that you want kids is liable in most places to get you nasty comments, which, ironically enough, usually come from women who themselves have children. A nice bit of hypocrisy, there, if you appreciate that sort of thing.
I'm really hoping that this anti-child attitude is the exception rather than the rule among women today. It is, isn't it? Anyone?
That's not the point. The US already has a birthrate that is below the replacement rate. The only reason that the population here is still growing is the relatively large rate of immigration. The countries that need to worry about overpopulation are places like India and China, not the US.
But regardless, none of that has any bearing on my question.
Sounds great, except it's not as easy as you paint it. (I know, my ex and I tried.)
Besides, that's not the question. If you want to adopt, fine, go ahead. But that doesn't mean everyone has to want the same things you do.
I'm not the one being rude, you are. You are being offensive, I'm not. You're falsely accusing me of doing what YOU are doing. You're the one biting people's heads off, not me.
If you don't want kids, fine. I never disagreed with that. But that completely ignores MY question.
You say there are plenty of women who want biological children? That doesn't seem to be the case. 80% of the replies here seem to be against it, which is exactly what I'm finding in real life. That is a distinct change from what things used to be like, and I'm puzzled by it.
Wrong. I'm responding poorly because you are being rude, offensive, engaging in personal attacks and making false accusations.
The one person here who DID politely disagree with me got a nice, polite thank-you from me.
Attacking someone's choice to have children is not "giving your perspective".
Many women who have children and are doing the single mom thing are tired. Raising a child without a father in the home is tiresome. Mentally and physically. Many, after having children and ending up single parents, are not willing to take a gamble at that happening, again. You would do best finding someone that doesn't have children.
What does that have to do with anything I said?
My point was that so many of the (single, childless) women I meet say they don't want to have children at all. Ever. With anyone.
It's very discouraging, especially when one is male, and doesn't even HAVE the option of becoming a single parent. (Which I would have already done, if it were possible.)
18 years of MY life. Which is worth every bit as much as hers. A man ALSO has to consider what he has to give up and what life he can offer his child. It works both ways.
Again, none of this has anything to do with what I posted.
And I didn't say I was "so worried". You made that part up. Why are you so hostile and negative?
Being concerned and being "so worried" are different things. That's why there are different words for them.
If indeed we are discussing a small minority of women who do not want children, then that's fine. That's an answer. The issue I brought up is that it does not appear to be a "small minority". As a rough guess, approximately half the single women I encounter these days state that they don't want children. If they are atypical, ok, that's fine. But it seemed to me to be a marked increase from what I was used to, the former 'small minority' that you mentioned.
You say that a woman will "sacrifice 18 years of her life" - that's an equally meaningless promise. As any number of abandoned children can testify. And can I provide all the things mentioned? You're damned right I can. Not that anyone would ever dare to ask a woman that question.
You have been the only one making accusations and unfounded assumptions, not me. I asked a question, and instead of answers, I've been attacked for desiring a normal life and family.
I would have welcomed a discussion along the lines of, "Yes/no, more women are/aren't deciding to have children these days." But instead, almost everyone decided to start criticizing me for wanting children, and announcing that I should adopt, instead.
This is exactly typical of what I have found - you have children yourself, yet are critical of anyone who only wants the same thing that you have yourself.
Amazing. What a hypocrite you are.