So, I've met a really great guy who seems to be everything I want......
....but he's Baptist. So far, we've been respectful of each others' beliefs (or lack of them) and we're both fans of life and passion in anything as long as you're true to yourself but.....butbutbut.....he's Baptist! We're still getting to know each other, so we are still being polite (yes, admit it, we all pretend to be someone more personable than who we really are or no mating would ever happen and anyone who denies this is a dingleberry), but I kinda wonder WHEN it's going to hit the fan.
Should I bother? I don't want to be one of those ppl that excludes all religious people from her life but....I don't like religion. I HATE religion! Conversely, we all whine when religious people exclude us from their lives, how can we exclude religious people from our lives?
Do you think it will hit the fan?
If it does, do you think it will be impossible to wipe off the walls after it does?
Am I being too paranoid and sabotaging the relationship?
Should I just nail him a whole lot so we don't have to talk about religion?
I just can't respect people with that mentality and I can't have sex with someone I can't respect. It's as simple as that for me. What if ur dude applies that same mentality when he's faced with another girl he has a boner for? Does his commitment to you go out the door just as his Christianity does every time he gets a hard on?
Haha, as amusing as that is, I don't believe it's true.
I've never had a relationship with a woman who wasn't a theist of one sort or another. But never really dated one who was anything but mildly into her religion, cultural christians for the most part. Overall I've rarely had any problems where religion was concerned.
That being said I did have one relationship crash and burn when one girlfriend (together 3 years) told me that evolution wasn't anything more than a wild guess and that god did it, blah blah blah. It was like listening to a AIG puppet just spewing out the stupid. Up until that point she'd never really even mentioned god, only that she believed in one. And she had no problem with me being an atheist. I ran for the hills.
Oh, and one woman.... my fiancée at the time, was told by her father that if she married an atheist he'd disown her. He'd asked what church we were planning on getting married in and I told him whatever one his daughter preferred or none at all, as an non-beliver (thats how i described it) it really didn't matter to me so long as she was happy. Soon after (when I wasn't around) he went right for the emotional extortion... atheist hubby or your family... one or the other, you can't have both. I lost. That one was the worst because it wasn't even a disagreement between us, we were very much in love and comfortable with one another. We had a good connection and talked about everything. But she was really tight with her family, especially her father. It took a month or two for her to decide, but in the end it was almost inevitable that our relationship was over.
So i guess my only advice is find out a little more about how religious he and his family really are before you invest too much emotional capital and wind up getting hurt.
If it's just for some extra curricular activities... have fun and be safe!
It will hit the fan. He thinks you're cute and is playing along to get in your panties.
It is never impossible to clean something up. However, with the stink coming from in there, you may not want to . . .
You are not being paranoid. This is a legitimate concern - you aren't sabotaging the relationship
Do you want to nail him a whole lot? If you aren't getting what you want out of the relationship it is time to move on . . .
I have a similar story to Rene Rosa with an Assembly of God parishoner, but my encounters with Southern Baptist girls generally don't even get that far. The length of the relationship varies with their level of conviction about their fairy in the sky. I still try though, because maybe I'll find that one who is on the fence and is close to Agnostic and we'll hit it off . . . but each breakup is reinforcing my own stereotypes about the Goddies, especially Southern Baptists.
Catholicism. ;o) I was Catholic until I reached the age of reason, as George Carlin would say. Sadly, Catholicism has started to eat my mother. My dad may very well be a closet atheist. I remember as a kid, mom made us (my sister and I) go to church, but daddy stayed home and watched TV. I was so jealous! haha
Ugh...at least she still loves you though! I've known people that weren't so lucky. I'm not out of the closet to my mom, but we were talking religion the other day and she made a joke, "I'm a true Catholic, I don't know anything about the Bible." We both laughed, but I snarkily said, "Well, then it's a good thing you base your life off of it."