Biologically speaking, we are mammals. There are only a fraction of species that engage in monogamous behavior; however, this innate drive is chemically motivated by the 1st law of nature: self-preservation-not choice.


Do you believe the proclivity of humanity is non-monogamous driven, or have we succumbed to a societal indoctrination of a relational matrix?



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Nontheist in NC,


What I find most revealing is the deafening silence regarding the rates of infidelity amid women. Women possess a higher rate of infidelity (44%) than men (34%); dispelling the mythology that men are dogs? So, when I articulate the non-monogamous theory, it is applicable to both genders; an aspect not brought up by women in any forum…I’m just sayin ;)


Funny how mythology on its head is truth inverted…*raising an eyebrow* 

Robert, where did you get your statistics on infidelity by gender?  Do you have a link?

All the google searches I did turned up research stating that men cheat more often than women.  The percentages varied wildly, of course, but the closest comparison I would find was this:

Percentage of men who admit to committing infidelity in any relationship they've had: 57%

Percentage of women who admit to committing infidelity in any relationship they've had: 54%

Most of the articles I found had men about 10-15% higher.

I have always had trouble with monogamy. Our human history teaches us that mankind has indulged in many types of sexual habits. Who was it that said she was monogamous one man at a time. I may dream of the perfect girl, but biologically I am ready to nail as many of them as I can. In the Old Testament we see many of Isreals forefathers practicing polygomy - many wives and concubines. There are many pluses to a monogamous relationship (all documented), but the basic urge in man is to breed. For a monogamous relationship to work, both parties have to turn off their basic sex drives and concentrate only on each other. For sex to happen it only takes opportunity. Why is it that monogomy has become the mainstay in Western culture, and not polygomy? Why do we still look at prostitution as a negative? Sometimes even sex? Sex is something that should be celebrated, not cursed. Monogomy does work in some, but not all. We should all have the freedom to exercise our personal choice in this matter.
I most certainly agree with you James. From biblical implications to the modernity of sexual categorization, society has become hypocritical of choices others manifest.

What is interesting is the bible never states polygamy is obsolete; the fundamentalists should love that one since literal interpretation is their forte.

I agree with the idea that monogamy is pretty much a cultural indoctrination issue, with nothing to do at all with biology.  I think the rates of divorce and infidelity, plus even a basic amount of literacy on biology or study of our close primate cousins make this one a slam dunk -- to use a slightly wobbly metaphor, its clearly software (cultural programming) not hardware.

Religions probably control human sexuality for a variety of reasons, some of which might once have had a benefit for promoting survival of the group; others a more obnoxious method of controlling breeding or limiting it to those who are powerful and important.  And of course, many dominant religions subjugate their  women to the status of mere baby-factories, regardless of claims to the contrary.

I think that there is a bell curve of a difference in the strength of instincts.   At one end there are the persons, probably predominantly men, driven by instinct into promiscuity, at the other end are those persons, predominantly women, who are naturally inclined to be only happy in monogamy.   Unfortunately in the case of a mismatch, it is the monogamous person, who gets hurt and suffers.  


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