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Cancer

If you have cancer.

If you had cancer.

If you know someone with cancer.

If you want to talk about cancer.

We won't pray.  We won't blame gods.  We won't give credit to gods.  

We face the diagnosis and know, it is what it is.  

To the extent that we can, we will define our own course.

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Latest Activity: on Saturday

Cancer

Cancer changes lives.

We have to deal with medical profession.

We have to deal with medications.

We have to deal with new discomfort and pain.

We have to create dignity, where there is indignity.

We have to deal with family members, friends, coworkers, and strangers, in a changed way.

We resolve to go forward with strength, resilience, purpose, pride, and integrity.

We define ourselves. Cancer does not define us.

Discussion Forum

Living interminably with terminal cancer

Started by Daniel W. Last reply by Dr. Terence Meaden on Saturday. 1 Reply

Psychology Today"Extraordinary advances have turned cancer from an apparent death sentence into…Continue

Tags: cancer

Transmissible Cancer

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by theburningmonk Apr 10. 1 Reply

Leukemia spreads in the ocean among soft-shell clams. This is the fourth example of natural cancer transmission in animals.…Continue

Tags: contagious cancer

Comment Wall

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Comment by Joan Denoo on January 19, 2014 at 5:03pm

I'm thinking about you, looking forward to your report. Like learning you are in your garden. Enjoy each and every moment ... don't read any of my screeds on politics, economics and religion. You don't need to think about those current events. I will stay positive on other sites. 

Comment by Daniel W on January 19, 2014 at 1:26pm

Thanks for the positive words.  

Statistically there is reason for optimism.  

Did some transplanting, puttering, pruning today.  Not a bad way to spend the morning. 

I will post when the results come back.

Thanks again!

Comment by Dr. Terence Meaden on January 19, 2014 at 12:56pm

We all know how you feel, so here's hoping there will be a clean report for you. Terry

Comment by Daniel W on January 19, 2014 at 9:09am

6 month CT scan was yesterday.  Report likely back tomorrow.  Keeping myself occupied.  It will be nice if it's clean.  When I have bad days, sometimes I think it wouldn't be bad if the cancer just does its thing.  That's not every day.  I try to keep my mind focused on "It is what it is".  The Zen attitude of not being too attached, including to life, but also to the idea of leaving life.   In a couple months it will be a year since "before cancer" became "with cancer".  So, it is what it is.  

Comment by Joan Denoo on January 11, 2014 at 11:42am

Mindy, well, be prepared for the inevitable. You may get a call or a knock on your door, or a requests from your son for advice on what to do. Being prepared is the best strategy. Be ready to respond when doubts, questions, fear in the form of anger, appear in anyone.  

Daniel gave me a bit of good advice a week or so ago when I was dealing with neighbor children of my great-grandchildren; use Socratic questions. My little ones were hearing bible stories at christmas time and were full of questions. The one that stumped me was how many different species of crocodiles and allegators did Noah put on the arc? Daniel advised to ask them; it worked. My great-grandchildren decided Noah couldn't put them all on. 

So easy! Thanks Daniel!

I think, when it comes right down to how to live a healthy, happy, and productive life is to be as real as humanly possible. Get rid of all delusions, be honest with oneself and with others. 

Well, I could be wrong; show me. 

Comment by Joan Denoo on January 10, 2014 at 11:22pm

Mindy, if the young man begins to question whether faith and belief continue to be justified justified, given all the evidence that he will encounter that supports skepticism, you will be there to discuss the matter with him. Or your son will undoubtedly be a source of searching and seeking. That is where my hope lies. When the truth begins to knock on doubts, there are better ways of being alive. Trained to obey, not question, sacrifice oneself, follow as a sheep, gets very old very quickly as one matures. There are more enlightened and satisfying ways to think. 

Comment by Joan Denoo on January 10, 2014 at 10:56pm

Daniel, you are on my thoughts. I hope things improve. Each day holds so many opportunities to care and participate in life. The turning of the seasons offers a nice chance to hunker down, without extra chores beckoning one out of a comfy chair. Getting ready for another season of engaging with the elements of life enriches in very many ways. Warmer days, more daylight, the greening of the Earth all invite us to take on another season. 

I feel very encouraged that there are growing numbers of people who embrace the reality of being free of promises and threats of dogma of all kinds. We are becoming a nation of non-believers, with all that implies. The numbers joining A/N encourages me that we don't have to be silent about our thoughts. More people accept differences of gender orientation. 

There continue to be rapids to maneuver, and individually we become stronger. It feels so good to be able to be open and honest about who we are and not motivated by fear of damnation and hope of heaven, neither of which were ever real.

Take good care dear friend. Congratulations on the fine start of your new site, Food. It is taking off with very good participation.

 

Comment by Daniel W on January 10, 2014 at 10:12pm

Joan,

"I am absolutely certain there is a plan for his life. He interprets it as a plan created by god for him. I say to him, the plan already exists inside of him, he is the author, the creator, the definer of his plan."

I really like that.  Often we don't know it, and often life intervenes with disruptions of whatever conscious or unconscious plan we have write.  But we are the authors of our plans.  Now, I need to have a talk with my editor.  :-)

They didn't PET scan me.  Just CT scan.  Next one is a week from  Saturday.  That's the 6-month point.  I've been sicker than usual lately, but no weight loss.  I suspect the "sicker" is work and exposures, and the "no weight loss" is a good thing.  Then again, I didn't lose weight while growing a 2 pound tumor in my belly.  I've been faithful taking the adjuvant therapy.  We'll see.  :-)

Comment by Joan Denoo on January 10, 2014 at 8:34pm

Oh yes, that wonderful PET scan. It is what tells the professionals if any cancer cells remain after the treatments. If the PET is clean, then the assumption/hope/passionately desired verdict of "free of cancer cells" may be true ... or there may be some hidden little devils that the scan didn't see. Or new ones just waiting to spring into being. 

My closest friend, Ed, the fellow who sends me all those funny pictures, and cartoons, had testicular cancer, went through all the protocols. Just this week he let me know that the cancer has spread to his bones. He is now in radiation trying to keep the pain down. Prognosis is not good. 

I hope the young man is free of cancer and can resume his life in a normal fashion to old age. Perhaps he will have to face the fact one day that he is not clear, that he has more rounds of whatever protocol they prescribe, and he can rest on the good work of his god or faith or belief.

Meanwhile, the doctors, nurses, technicians, all those people who sit with those who throw up in emesis basins, or who cry out in pain, faithfully care for and provide what comfort is available. 

Their god sits serenely by, not giving a hand at cleaning up the messes, or holding hands, or giving comfort to family who suffers a different kind of pain than the patient.

I am absolutely certain there is a plan for his life. He interprets it as a plan created by god for him. I say to him, the plan already exists inside of him, he is the author, the creator, the definer of his plan. His life is in his own hands and he needs no crutch to hand him a plan on a silver platter.  No god can provide the kind of comfort, certainty, confidence and competence that comes out of his own wisdom.

Well, I hope he doesn't have too hard of a time figuring that all out. Delusions are a dreadful thing to overcome. I wish him well.  

Comment by Idaho Spud on December 29, 2013 at 4:08pm

Daniel, so sorry about your horrible experience aspirating cancer medication.  I would give-up secrets as well.

 

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