Hmmm. This is a tough one for many. For me personally, it's not that hard. I've never been close to family or friend for much of my life, so even if the ties are cut by death or distance, I tend to move on as if nothing happened. Recently, however, I've come to change this tune. For the first time I am afraid of some persons close to me dying or going far away. Everything changes when certain bonds are formed.
I would just console the ones grieving by saying something like..this time will come for all of us and that is why we must enjoy the here and now...use this as a lesson to live life now and not depend on anyone else to fulfill us. You could also say something good about the persons character who died..if there is anything good to say..
Well pain is pain no matter who u r....but death is depemdent on how close u were with the person.....and just being an associate or relative does not necessarily qualify as close.....
When my grandfather died a yr ago everyone was crying and i was like ...dude why should i cry me and this man never had a bond......and according to some family members I was the devil.....at least I'm always honest about my feelings......not saying they aren't honest about theirs just that it takes a great deal for me to get attached to a person, maybe its an atheist thing but other than my daughter i don't have genuine love for anyone else and i have a huge family that I grew with but I cant pretend i love them...I care for them alot but if death comes I'll be over it in a day as the immediate shock wears off.