LGBTQI atheists, nontheists, and friends


LGBTQI atheists, nontheists, and friends

Nontheist lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and intersex people & friends.

Location: International
Members: 622
Latest Activity: on Sunday

Welcome to Gay / LGBTQI Atheists & friends!

The I in LGBTI

Discussion Forum

Religious Colleges get federal pass on discrimination

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by Joan Denoo Apr 9. 3 Replies

Gay Suicide - Art Backfires

Started by Bertold Brautigan. Last reply by Bertold Brautigan Mar 30. 6 Replies

Supported Transgender Kids Do Fine

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner Mar 24. 0 Replies

Caitlyn Jenner loves Ted Cruz

Started by Daniel W. Last reply by Susan Stanko Mar 7. 15 Replies

Mean Sally says, "Go kill yourself!"

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by k.h. ky Jan 31. 9 Replies

Way of the Mister: Murder the Gays!!! (Brian Dalton)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Loren Miller Nov 18, 2015. 16 Replies

Gender Identity and Sustainability

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner Oct 26, 2015. 0 Replies

Epigenetics and sexual orientation

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner Oct 8, 2015. 0 Replies

Gaydar doesn't exist and it's bad?

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by Daniel W Sep 13, 2015. 2 Replies

Comment Wall


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Comment by Daniel W on May 13, 2012 at 8:28am

VeganTiger, thank you for engaging this discussion. I think it is much better to have the people who are most affected by the topic, to describe your experience.  My own thoughts, which are only partially informed, are-

People seem to expect a rigid conformity where nature is more diverse.  Rather than forcing people into that conformity, we should let them decide.

Societies like to do bad things to genitals.  What is done to intersex babies is far, far more than circumcision.  Given the passion around discussions of circumcision, it's hard for me to accept that societies, parents, doctors can't just wait and let the individual decide what they want, as adults.

Even though people may mean well when they do genital surgery, is it really so bad to just let children grow up to become themselves?  Why not let society become re-educated and learn that diversity does not make someone a "freak", but rather provides an alternative way of being? 

People should just accept one another and understand that not everyone feels or thinks the same things, but there is a universality in being human and wanting to love and be loved, and feel passion and connection to others.

Comment by vegantiger on May 12, 2012 at 10:53pm

>>>Let me elaborate: Bob was an intersexed baby, and his parents >>>chose to make him a boy. As an adult Bob feels he should have >>>been a woman. But if Bob HAD NOT been intersexed, would he >>>have grown up as a transsexual anyhow? We can never know >>>for sure.


I would have to say yes, we do know for sure. Bob would grow up to be a transsexual whether he was born intergendered, completely male, or anything in-between. The problem is at the time of the hormone bath the baby gets. Whatever goes wrong is still unclear, but several causative factors have been identified such as contaminated water containing chemicals, drugs, etc., legal or illegal drugs the mother consumes during pregnancy, environmental factors such as radiation leaks, cell phone towers on apartment buildings, etc., etc., long list regarding these issues.


The one issue I DO question if society knows the answer to is would most people grow up homosexual or pansexual given the chance? It's hilarious when religious people say "just look at nature". What about it? The rest of the animals in the world have sex whenever they want, wherever they want, with whomever they want and I think that shows what mankind is capable of doing as well. Of course we have laws of "decency" regarding where we have sex, but personally, I think most people would be open to experimenting with everyone if they were raised in an open society.

Comment by vegantiger on May 12, 2012 at 10:45pm

I was born intergendered/intersexed and would love to add to the discussion. My wife and I just moved so I haven't been commenting much lately. Thanks for posting the video. It was actually one of the first ones I saw to describe what I felt was wrong with me all along but didn't have the words to express it other than praying I would wake up from this nightmare one day as a boy. I remember crying a lot and then getting very, very angry. I studied all about transgender issues for the next two years finally finding out from my mom that I was operated on at birth and made into a girl. They are claiming to be stopping this practice and at least choosing male for children so surgery is not so difficult. It's easier to make a girl than a boy. I certainly blame religion for trying to make a two gender society and doctors acting like gods to make sure. More and more evidence is suggesting there are certainly more than two genders. Only time will tell if humanity can be properly educated to include more terminology so everyone can feel accepted as human beings instead of being treated like trashy, sub-human, freaks. I know not everyone is happy calling it a birth defect, but it feels that way for me and seems easier to explain to others in that manner as well as getting insurance companies to cover it like any other birth defect would be. I can say from experience that it would be much better to leave children alone and let them tell their parents what gender they are since that occurs as soon as two years old; just not make it mandatory that they choose a gender. Some countries now have a third gender or at least an "other" category which is nice. In one way I wish this had never happened to me and yet I've learned so much about humanity, life, people, gender differences/samenesses, hormones, etc. It's an interesting journey. I'm still not complete surgically but I'm just starting my bottom surgeries this month; finally! I've been "transitioning" for over 10 years now; hate that word because I've always known I was male. Still have several years to go with surgeries but I'm relieved it's now here! If anyone has questions, I'd be happy to answer them! :-)

Comment by The Flying Atheist on May 12, 2012 at 8:21pm

Not my apartment.  I'm much more old school.  I actually have a Victrola and View Masters for my guests to enjoy.  

Comment by Daniel W on May 12, 2012 at 8:02pm

Im just shocked!  The book case appears to contain record albums and VCR Tapes.  I bet they're betamax.  Oh the horror!

On a better note, the baby blue does flatter your eyes.

Comment by The Flying Atheist on May 12, 2012 at 7:39pm

Me on the right in my silly mid-twenties. 

Comment by The Flying Atheist on May 12, 2012 at 7:27pm

P.S. Joan.  If I were to dress in drag, I'd much prefer Oxfords.  I don't do very well in heels. 

Comment by The Flying Atheist on May 12, 2012 at 7:21pm

Joan, please don't let us scare you away.  Dallas is one of our outstanding members......well, usually (lol).  Many of us have a tendency to remove our shoes, step off the curb and enjoy a short diversion through the gutter from time to time.  When in Rome......   You might even find a topic of mutual interest to discuss with your hip grandchildren and surprise them with your newly found knowledge.  You're always welcome here.  And personally, from me to you....thanks for being such a wonderful supporter and friend of the LGBTQ community.  The "coolness" of your background far exceeds your perceived prudishness.       

Comment by Susan Stanko on May 12, 2012 at 5:09pm

No need to apologize for the long response.  I actually hadn't considered that someone wouldn't identify as either gender.  It is so unusual for me that I forget that people like the nerd exist.

Comment by Daniel W on May 12, 2012 at 4:54pm

Susan, me too.  Also, in many cases, there is no "right gender" - some people are truly intersex and choosing a gender imposes an identity on them, and surgical changes to the body, even if neither gender is right.  The expression "first, do no harm" comes to mind.  I also wish they would use language to say there are variations of nature, rather then errors of nature.  Diversity is not an error, and in fact a propensity toward diversity is the basis for evolution, even if a particular individual does not reproduce.  Sorry for the long response - I agree with you.


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