On a dating site, they offer as an option under social settings:  SIDE-KICK.   What does that mean?  (For who has not noticed yet, English is not my native language, so this is a serious question)

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A sidekick is usually an informal word for a close friend, but it may have some other meaning I'm not familiar with (and English is my native language!).  I wanted to post, though, so I would get updates and hopefully learn what it means too.

I've never heard that term before. Maybe the Urban Dictionary has it -- Let me check here.


Sidekick 17 up, 13 down

Somebody other then your main boyfriend or girlfriend; Lover on the side.
"A man can have a main dame and his sidekick chick on the side."

Yeah -- Lover on the side is what I thought.

No, that does not seem to fit.   Because it is not an option of what relationship is searched, but an option of social settings.  Here is the entire list:

The life of the party
Shy at first, but warm up quickly
Home Body
Social Butterfly
Side kick
Better in small groups
Comic Relief

I also do not know, what they mean by 'comic relief', but nobody has chosen it, but side-kick well.

From feminist consciousness-raising, a side kick is one of those roles for emotional dependents. In male dominant societies, men are threatened by women of equal status and respect, so they define all female roles as semi-subserviant. Traditional female roles included helpmate, secretary, kept woman, sex object, servant, or side kick. She was never an equal or a boss, never someone whose opinion should be taken seriously.

The side kick lets the dominant person make all of the important choices, and goes along with the program as a helper. You sometimes see two women or two men who dress almost identically and have similar mannerisms. That's also the signature of a side kick relationship. Like The Lone Ranger and Tonto, Batman and Robin, Sherlock Holmes and Mr Watson, there's always a dominant and a submissive. A wing man is a side kick.

I do not recommend you identify as a side kick. It implies you do not want to be in charge of your life, that you lack authenticity.

This is probably the definition most fitting to self-labeling as a social setting inclination.  But then I am still puzzled, what a man means, when he choices 'side-kick' as the only of  all the options for labeling himself.   A man, who is looking for a serious relationship... 

I've been dealing for a few months with a recently retired man who has chosen to serve as sidekick to an organization's elected president. Though about forty years ago he earned a doctorate in political science and has taught that subject, I've seen in him a willingness, and even a need, to obey authority, even when that authority appears to have no power in his life.

My view of his behavior is of course subjective since I believe it important to question authority. To the advice "Relax in the face of the inevitable", I say "How do I know it's inevitable unless I poke at it a few times?"

Several years in hardball politics persuaded me that it's dangerous to take freedom from people who want it AND TO GIVE FREEDOM TO PEOPLE WHO DON'T WANT IT.

OK... then I was way off. ;-)  I checked Urban dictionary too... but only read the first three entries.  Thanks for sticking with it Steph!

Those are all terms for how a person might describe their personality.  Perhaps sidekick means that you are someone else's sidkick... normally the more quiet, or less popular of a pair.  Think of Robin as a sidekick to Batman.  As for comic relief, that would be someone who likes to make jokes, often to get off of a heavy topic.  Other thoughts?

Re comic relief, Annie, I agree wholeheartedly.

A few years ago I knew two men well who used humor to take attention from serious subjects.

One of them, elected to lead a small local organization, did it so well that he succeeded even with me a few times before I saw what he was doing and asked him to deal with the problem.

The other did it less well by resurrecting really ancient jokes.

Sidekicks? Quieter than the other, yes. Even seeming to need someone more dominant.

Do you know about the site CarbonDate Me?  It is supposedly a dating site for atheists. 

thanks, I am checking it out.   BTW, jazzed has free communication weekend.  




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