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Hang With Friends

Location: Earth
Members: 867
Latest Activity: 44 minutes ago

Come on in, pull up a chair!

Picture yourself spending some time with congenial friends, sharing your lives and pictures from your cell phones." They're curious about that cool game, song, movie, camping trip, art show, or other event that fascinated you. You talk about all kinds of stuff, poetry, styles, personal achievements, relationships, and bad days. You can share your inner child, and laugh together. They sympathetically listen to your feelings about serious topics like politics or climate change, even when they don't agree.

Personal validation comes from paying attention to one another, giving more than you get. Everyone respects you and themselves, despite our amazing range of personal tastes and interests. They'll tell you they don't agree with an idea or behavior without implying you're a bad person or somehow deficient. It's an "I'm OK, You're OK" kind of fellowship, where nobody tries to make himself look better by picking on somebody else.

Nobody here is into mind games. A discussion started with a loaded guilt-throwing question will be deleted.

This group is not intended to compete with other groups on topics they cover but to "fill in the cracks." Whenever a discussion dwells at length on a topic for which there's an existing group, we urge you to provide members a link to that group to continue along their tangent.

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Discussion Forum

Did the American Revolution produce significant benefits for women, native Americans, blacks, propertyless white males, and indentured servants?

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner yesterday. 3 Replies

Did the American Revolution produce significant benefits for native Americans, blacks, propertyless white males, and indentured servants?On blacks:"We think they are not, and that they are not included, and were not intended to be included…. They…Continue

Tags: white, propertyless, male, indentured, survants

Your favorite photobombs?

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by Chris G on Friday. 16 Replies

Running of the bulls photobomb.Continue

Men who challenge men to stop violence

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Grinning Cat May 24. 17 Replies

Many men join in the effort to reduce violence against women and children and other men. He speaks of the need to place responsibility on men instead of focusing on women to stop violence. He offers a breath of fresh air, as do so many of the men on…Continue

Surreal, I haz it

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner May 22. 83 Replies

Surreal, not just found in art.Continue

Tags: surreal

Such Lyrics!

Started by Donatien Alphonse François. Last reply by Joan Denoo May 19. 8 Replies

Hello Friends,I was ruminating a bit today on my sixty-some years existence. My mind went back to teenage years when I first figured out religion is not only obnoxiously loud, but also nothing I wanted anything to do with. Truly. I knew by age 15…Continue

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Comment by Ruth Anthony-Gardner 44 minutes ago

Impressive lighting effect, Daniel. I imagined much smaller, dimmer ceiling brightening.

Joan, you're not the only one annoyed by LOLspeak. I think it's because people need to feel superior, so they make the cats seem stupid. It's also like regression to a child ego state, a chance to talk like a kid in public, acceptably.

Our culture is loaded with this sort of thing. For example whenever a TV character is portrayed as a genius, he or she always has to either be socially inept in the extreme or have a major character flaw. In Buck Rogers, the genius robot had to be programmed as an arrogant a**hole. <sigh> Our cultural products reflect how flawed we are.

image source

I hear you Ian on, "Where there's a will there's a relative."

Joan, I've only kept up intermittently here, and missed something. You're not living with your daughter any more? Ah, it's depressing hearing you talk about dying and sorting your belongings for relatives. I'm not sorting anything. I've always loved Bobby McFerrin's performances. He looks extra nice dressed in white tux and bare feet, relaxing. Mostly funny, with a dark undercurrent. I found the floating out of shoes on the window ledge disturbing.

Comment by Bertold Brautigan 1 hour ago

Joan-Harold and Maude is one of my favorite movies of all time. The direction was about as close to perfect as it could get. I don't think there's a minute in the film that doesn't further the story or the brilliant symbolism. The identical desks of the authority figures (priest, shrink, military officer) with portraits of their leaders (pope,  Freud, president) were priceless.

Comment by Qiana-Maieev 1 hour ago

Comment by Joan Denoo 3 hours ago

Comment by Daniel W 4 hours ago
Joan, I didnt know you moved back to Spokane! Sorry I have not been in the loop! Well, Im glad you can be wherever makes you happy!

Ian, when my parents died, I just let go of everything. i figured their obligation to me ended when I became an adult. The rest was gravy. I did say, If no one wanted the family photos, going back 4 or 5 or 6 generations, I would take them. And 2 furniture items. I actually regret that, because the photos feel like an obligation to be their caretaker no one else living cares about, and the one furniture Item That I got feels sort of the same way. Its an old oak dresser.

Joan, glad you have Cary there to help out.

My main job after retiring seems to be to get rid of stuff. I took 3 carloads of items to goodwill, and 2 carloads of books to the public library used book sale. I filled up the recycle bin and trash bin several times over. It helps that with retirement,
I quit all the stress eating and junk food and none of the old clothes fit now, so off to goodwill with most of my clothes. Im down to one closet plus one dresser, that's all I use or need.
Comment by Joan Denoo 4 hours ago

Ian and Chris, I am at the other end of the teeter totter with trying to sort out my things and where they are to go after my death. Craig and his family are not able to come north for several reasons, the high cost of medical care being one. He and his family are not able to show me what they want so I am arbitrarily listing my dining things as theirs. They can give them to another family member if they want. Laura's family come here often and I know what they want, mostly the kitchen items. I have a lot of gadgets they may find useful in their cooking. Cary gets first choice on all that is in the house. The family agree with that decision because he takes such good care of me. 

By the way, I am happy that I moved back to my home. I want to die here, hopefully in my garden or bed. 

I feel very good, my doctors' appointments all are within a mile of my home, my longtime friends live here, and you know how much I love my garden. I wish I had chickens, however, I know I will not always be able to care for them, especially in the winter time or when I am feeling so punky, and Cary would have to do the work. I don't want to impose on him any more than I do. He does an amazing amount of work here and helps me as much as he can. He is still a crotchety middle-aged man and even a burned out light bulb becomes a big deal. I just put an imaginary wall up to deflect the grumpiness and go about my business.

You know, life is so full of burned out light bulbs and replacing them can be interesting. 

Well, happy day to each of you. 

Comment by Plinius 6 hours ago

Sorry for your loss Ian. And try hard to stay apart from the inheritance hunters. I found out that even taking some care of an elderly relative makes you suspect in some peoples' eyes: very sad and quite disgusting.

Comment by Ian Mason 15 hours ago

Got back from England yesterday. My stepmothers funeral went well. The 'old' vicar from our village came out of retirement for a day and did a very good job: a short service at the cremetorium with a lot of personal things. Everybody was satisfied. The bother started a couple of days later. Where there's a will there's a relative. I'll spare you the details but I'm glad I live the other side of the North sea.

Comment by Ian Mason 15 hours ago

Nice job, Daniel.

A rule of thumb I use with religious people is; I don't care what you believe, only what you do. If you cultivate religion for profit, turn a blind eye to the abuse of children and other followers, restrict access to education or in any way hinder reasonable progress or try to force your beliefs on others then you are WRONG. Of course this isn't valid every time and in every situation but it's a viable starting point.

Comment by Joan Denoo 19 hours ago

Ruth and Qiana, you are right, ask believers about their hypocrisies. I think their humanitarian aid should include working to change the political structure that creates poverty and injustice. Starving and homeless people need food, shelter, water, and sanitation. 

Thanks for your insights. 

 

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