Hang With Friends

Location: Earth
Members: 872
Latest Activity: 22 hours ago

Come on in, pull up a chair!

Picture yourself spending some time with congenial friends, sharing your lives and pictures from your cell phones." They're curious about that cool game, song, movie, camping trip, art show, or other event that fascinated you. You talk about all kinds of stuff, poetry, styles, personal achievements, relationships, and bad days. You can share your inner child, and laugh together. They sympathetically listen to your feelings about serious topics like politics or climate change, even when they don't agree.

Personal validation comes from paying attention to one another, giving more than you get. Everyone respects you and themselves, despite our amazing range of personal tastes and interests. They'll tell you they don't agree with an idea or behavior without implying you're a bad person or somehow deficient. It's an "I'm OK, You're OK" kind of fellowship, where nobody tries to make himself look better by picking on somebody else.

Nobody here is into mind games. A discussion started with a loaded guilt-throwing question will be deleted.

This group is not intended to compete with other groups on topics they cover but to "fill in the cracks." Whenever a discussion dwells at length on a topic for which there's an existing group, we urge you to provide members a link to that group to continue along their tangent.

A comment is a shout-out, which will get lost in a few days, because the comment wall is just a random stack.

Please start a discussion to share stories, photos, and videos. Replies will pop up in your "latest activity" and a conversation can develop from the feelings and thoughts you contributed. Groups are built on discussions.

Discussion Forum

The Whole Bible in 30 Seconds (Betty Bowers)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Randy Hatly on Thursday. 15 Replies

Ever decide that you wanted to read the whole bible, cover to cover, only to realize half-way through Deuteronomy that the darn thing is industrial-strength BORING?!?  Well, never fear!  America's Best Christian, Betty Bowers, has done the Cliff's…Continue

Tags: bible, America's Best Christian, Betty Bowers

punishing doubt (TheraminTrees)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Joan Denoo on Tuesday. 2 Replies

If you are associated with religion and especially a fundamentalist religion, doubt is intolerable.  Certainty, however it may be achieved or imposed, becomes a necessary element, especially considering the utter dearth of any form of evidence or…Continue

Tags: religion, TheraminTrees, punish, doubt

A moment to relax and see the Earth from space; some how this comforts me.

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Qiana-Maieev on Sunday. 3 Replies

All the squabbles and struggles that I have do not compare with those of some others on this great planet. There are no boundary lines, no political arguments, no up or no down. What is, is. For right now, the scenes offer tranquility. Just the…Continue

Tags: and, wonder, awe, of, space

His Dark Materials and the Catholic Church

Started by Tonya R. Wheeler. Last reply by Plinius on Sunday. 27 Replies

I recently watched the movie, "The Golden Compass" and since I could not find the sequels, I read the books. I enjoyed them, and I will be reading the first one, Northern Lights, starting tomorrow, since it just arrived via inter-library…Continue

Tags: Fantasy, Catholic, Religion, Atheist, Pullman

Issues Atheist, Feminist, GLBTQ, Climate Change

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Joan Denoo Oct 6. 2 Replies

This is a test Continue

bending truth, or "We Can All Be Manipulated" (TheraminTrees)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Loren Miller Sep 29. 39 Replies

The following is one of TheraminTrees' most thorough-going pieces, wherein he looks at the process and techniques whereby a "religious" organization (which will sound VERY familiar to most of us, once introductions are made!) takes a person who…Continue

Tags: indoctrination, truth, manipulation, TheraminTrees

Comment Wall


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Comment by Steph S. on January 9, 2013 at 5:12pm

I just read your story about your dad sk8eycat - thank you so much for sharing with us.

Cute doglol booklover - thank you for sharing your story with us.

Wow - so much to read today. I am getting caught up.

You aren't boring Melinda. You have a nice peaceful life. Sounds wonderful to me.

Sorry to hear about your drunk dad John. Appreciate your sharing.

Ashley thanks for sharing your story about your dad with us.

I don't drink alcohol myself.

Enjoying the conversation here.

Wonderful to see all the sharing.

Comment by Ashley West on January 9, 2013 at 3:53pm

Hello, everyone. This is my first time commenting on here but once I saw this I just wanted to share something. My dad was an alcoholic before I was even born, and my childhood was spent trying to avoid his temper, or any other dangerous positions he decided to try and put me in. Thankfully my mom left him before he could do any serious damage to me. Like you, Melinda, I cannot tolerate alcohol very well myself these days. I don't know if its a physical reaction to the memory of my father or if I just really can't handle it but it always makes me sick. I know the feeling of growing up and starting to drink too just to try and cope with the other people around you that are doing it, but it just makes the situation worse. At least for me it does.

I am glad for those that have had the problem that have gotten themselves help. It's very hard to overcome, or so it seems with my family. 

By the way, Melinda, that is the cutest picture. My dog used to chase his tail all the time but I don't think he ever caught it. ;-)

Comment by John Lynch on January 9, 2013 at 11:13am

I know my children like me sober over being drunk. My wife put up with me for eleven years before he had enough. I am thankful she did or who knows what that would have led. My ex and I were getting along fairly well until she found out I was an atheist. She began sending me emails with religious messages. I sent her some information on the bible and it seems she did not care for facts. I have not heard from her in some time. I am quite sure my daughter is an atheist and my son is more an agnostic. I do not tell them what to believe or not to believe. 

Comment by John Lynch on January 9, 2013 at 9:59am

I see that some of us has a common link to drunk fathers. My problem is mine never left. Many times I wished he would never come back when he left fr work. I guess the bigger problem was three of his sons, me included, turned to alcohol. I finally sobered up in AA when I was still a believer. I cannot deny it gave me a place to go. I still go to a few meetings but have trouble listening when god speak is in abundance. Some of them you can get through without to much god. Of course I do not join in the prayer after the meeting. I stand aside or just leave.I am not sure I have grown up myself but I am responsible in everyday living. I have a tough time in social gatherings. I never had the problem when drinking. I at least thought I was the life of the party until the next day. 

Comment by Plinius on January 9, 2013 at 6:50am

Congrats, Melinda! I hope the next 25 years will be better still! And there's nothing wrong with a boring life - especially after troubles with fathers.

Comment by sk8eycat on January 9, 2013 at 12:16am

Well, I've been awake for 36+ hours now, and still don't feel sleepy...but I'm tired!  And not making much sense.  Just thought I'd check in and let y'all know I'm reading your posts, laughing at (and printing) all the silly animal pics, and I really do appreciate all your "welcome back" notes and stuff.

To biggest problem with my dad's drinking was that for the first 10 years of my life, he was my hero.  He was a very intelligent man, and he was interested in a lot of different things....boating, astronomy, parrots, cats, books.  On my 6th birthday he took me to the library, showed the clerk my birth certificate, and voila...I had my very own library card! 

I didn't notice that his drinking was out of control till I was 12 or 13, but mother said it started when I was in 5th grade.  Anyway, he just gradually became a stupid stumblebum...mostly only at home. I was ashamed to have my friends come to our house (so we gathered at their homes), and when I started dating in high school I NEVER ONCE introduced any of my boyfriends to him. Never even let them come to the door. I would wait outside for my dates to pick me up.  I didn't want anyone to see him almost passed out on the sofa or trying to be sociable, but slurring his words, obviously drunk.  (This was the 1950s...."Father Knows Best" time.)

Joining Holiday a few weeks after graduation was such a relief!  I didn't have to pretend anymore because we never played anywhere within 1,000 miles of SoCal. (We toured mostly in the midwest and the deep south, and ended the tours by playing Mexico City for a whole month! We loved THAT!)

I was on the road when there was one of those "confrontations" here, and he was dragged, kicking and screaming (well...not really, but reluctantly) to one of those drying-out hospitals.  It worked for him, but I think even today those places have only about a 50% success rate. If that.

But he was sober. So I came home and went to work for him....he had a small bookkeeping and tax preparation practice.  I was always rotten in arithmetic in school, but with a good old Addo-X, I found that balancing ledgers and reconciling bank statements could be fun.  I've always liked solving puzzles, and that's what it feels like to me, even now.

Years and years later, after he died, I finally figured out why he always refused to have anything to do with AA...I'm pretty sure he was a closeted atheist.  Mother, raised in the buybull belt, was the only one who talked about god and Jeebus and heaven and hell, and dragged me to Sunday school when I was little.

That's my story, and I'm sticking to it. 


Comment by Steph S. on January 8, 2013 at 6:09pm

I love that booklover!!

I am taking it for my collection.

You are right Melinda (booklover) you should not care what others think about you.

Congrats on your anniversary Patricia.

Comment by Grinning Cat on January 8, 2013 at 2:11pm

Tony, I like the caterpillar/caterfly!

Felaine, Ruth, Melinda, I appreciate your stories, and feel like I too am getting to know you better.

When you have genuine caring and affection, compatibility in bed is a wonderful bonus!

... I'm lucky to have found a lot of much nicer guys. And smart enough to give back the engagement rings of the first two prospects, when their true nature showed through. Never regretted those decisions. My second husband has been the real keeper.

Ruth, that sounds like creating your own luck!

Comment by The Flying Atheist on January 8, 2013 at 10:28am

Thanks for the John Lennon quote, Joseph.  I like it.  If there's one thing I'm good at, it's relaxing and wasting time.  I have a sneaky suspicion that I'm going to enjoy retirement when it happens. 

Sk8eycat, nice to have you back.  Always great to hear from you.  :)

Comment by sk8eycat on January 8, 2013 at 9:45am

Something weird: During the almost 2 weeks I was cat-sitting, I saw a lot of TV commercials for Angie's List, so I thought I'd check it out (you have to pay to join).  I looked at the long list of cities and towns in California that they have reviews of businesses for, and Burbank wasn't even there.  Bizarre!  They have listings for  some places up in Gold Rush country that are practically ghost towns, but not a city with a population of about 100,000, several major studios (and a lot of minor ones), medical centers, every business imaginable (except bordellos...maybe)...and....and...and.  I don't GET it. 

But I "saved" about $35 by looking before joining. 


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