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Hang With Friends

Location: Earth
Members: 884
Latest Activity: yesterday

Come on in, pull up a chair!

Picture yourself spending some time with congenial friends, sharing your lives and pictures from your cell phones." They're curious about that cool game, song, movie, camping trip, art show, or other event that fascinated you. You talk about all kinds of stuff, poetry, styles, personal achievements, relationships, and bad days. You can share your inner child, and laugh together. They sympathetically listen to your feelings about serious topics like politics or climate change, even when they don't agree.

Personal validation comes from paying attention to one another, giving more than you get. Everyone respects you and themselves, despite our amazing range of personal tastes and interests. They'll tell you they don't agree with an idea or behavior without implying you're a bad person or somehow deficient. It's an "I'm OK, You're OK" kind of fellowship, where nobody tries to make himself look better by picking on somebody else.

Nobody here is into mind games. A discussion started with a loaded guilt-throwing question will be deleted.

This group is not intended to compete with other groups on topics they cover but to "fill in the cracks." Whenever a discussion dwells at length on a topic for which there's an existing group, we urge you to provide members a link to that group to continue along their tangent.

A comment is a shout-out, which will get lost in a few days, because the comment wall is just a random stack.

Please start a discussion to share stories, photos, and videos. Replies will pop up in your "latest activity" and a conversation can develop from the feelings and thoughts you contributed. Groups are built on discussions.

Discussion Forum

The myth of religions

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Joan Denoo Feb 16. 3 Replies

The creation myth of civilizations instructs men to dominate, to conquer, to go forth and multiply. No reasonable person would pay attention to such a god. No hunter-gatherer receives such a senseless message from wise elders.However, that idea…Continue

Tags: masculine, violation, imperative, go forth and multiply,, conquest

Winter Driving, Preparing for the worst

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Joan Denoo Feb 1. 2 Replies

Now that we enter the time the Celtics called Imbolc, a pagan celebration of the beginning of spring and season of new life, I ran across this video on preparing for winter driving. It offers reasons for each thing he puts in his vehicles to be safe…Continue

Tags: prepare, driving, winter

A Powerful Message from an old wise teacher :

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Chris Dec 26, 2017. 10 Replies

I received a gift this morning from a virtual friend, Pamela Smith:A Powerful Message from an old wise teacher :" One day an old wise teacher was walking through a village. A very angry and rude young man came up and began insulting him. "You have…Continue

10 Tricks from 46 (Betty Bowers)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner Nov 6, 2017. 3 Replies

Apparently, Betty Bowers, America's Best Christian, has been slumming.  That is to say, she's been talking to Mike Pence [gasp!].  It would seem as though Mike has offered some of his not-so-personal tricks of the trade on how to be a 21st century…Continue

Tags: tricks, Mike Pence, America's Best Christian, Betty Bowers

Surreal, I haz it

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by Grinning Cat Oct 19, 2017. 99 Replies

Surreal, not just found in art.Continue

Tags: surreal

Comment Wall

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Comment by Joan Denoo on December 7, 2015 at 5:31pm

Ian, sorry to learn of your malaise. Depression can be a dreadful experience. I urge you to do everything you can to get out of the dumps.  Worry can be so debilitating; it saps your energy and the energy of those who care about you. 

There are many kinds of therapy and some work quickly and get one back on one's feet, others seem not to be so effective. 

I prefer "Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). It is designed to help people find new ways of dealing with hurtful thoughts and behaviors. Instead of delving into the past to determine where a feeling or emotion comes from, CBT helps patients become more aware of how their beliefs or actions are contributing to depression. Once those are identified, a therapist will work with his or her patient to replace those negative attitudes with more positive ones. There may be daily or weekly exercises and guidance involved to help patients apply the skills they learn in therapy to the real world. Research has shown that many people who undergo CBT for depression see significant improvement."

Learning new skills, identifying situations that influence me to feel anger, fear, sadness, guilt, or shame, and then exploring ways to solve a problem if it is solvable, or learning ways to let go of the hurtful feelings, or accept reality without creating delusions. 

Many people turn to religion for a crutch when they feel helpless or hopeless. That is just another delusion and doesn't solve anything. Some claim to feel better with religion; it is a mental construct that allows them to give the problem to god and let go. 

Letting go of a bad feeling requires solving a problem or reframing the experience into a healthy way of thinking. For example, when a person experiences the death of a child, instead of giving the pain to god, a healthy response is to face the reality of the loss, express gratitude for the one who died. Reframe the grief into gratitude.

Comment by Joan Denoo on December 7, 2015 at 4:50pm

Randy, thanks for asking Carl for his update. I watch each mail to see if there is a word from him even as I know the recovery of energy level takes time. 

Comment by Joan Denoo on December 7, 2015 at 4:47pm

Carl, thank you for the update. I am very happy to learn the surgery and hospital experience went well and you came home ready to walk the road to recovery.

Your regime sounds very similar to my follow-up. When the first year was over, I felt a loss of not seeing my Cancer Care NW medical staff. I do have follow-ups now, but only every three months. Daniel's regime is different than mine. I experienced the weekly, then monthly, and now every three months check-up. I experienced the blood draws as virtually painless procedures. I hope your experiences are similar to mine. 

How is your sister doing? I think of you two often. If there is an energy that goes between people, I send you my thoughts for both of you reaching a new normal that works for you.

Comment by The Flying Atheist on December 7, 2015 at 4:06pm
Thanks for asking, Randy. Overall I'm doing well. Everything related to my transplant has progressed nicely. The surgery was a complete success and I'm healing quite well. Last week I had my thirty-four incision staples removed. The only problems I have is dealing with the anti-rejection drugs. They are causing nausea, hand tremors, and a general feeling of malaise and aloofness. Hopefully these symptoms will diminish over time. I left the hospital on very high doses. For the next several months the doctors will be tweaking my dose levels. The anti-rejection drugs lower your immune system so the body doesn't reject the new kidney, but too low is bad and too high causes bad side effects. I'm taking these meds twice a day, every day. I was told eventually I will be on a much lower dose daily or perhaps even once weekly. All this takes time and a lot of blood draws to determine the correct dose for me. I'm having to have my blood tested three times per week. Next week will start only twice per week for a month. The third month is once weekly. It's all a slow progression.

I'm also seeing a physical therapist twice per week to strengthen my legs, as my kidney disease caused such weekness. Getting my legs back to normal is expected to take several months.

I'm also on a 10-pound lifting restriction until December 24. Thank God the following day I'll be able to hold the baby Jesus when he arrives! :)
Comment by Bertold Brautigan on December 7, 2015 at 3:54pm

Tweak his cheek for me, Carl

Comment by Randall Smith on December 7, 2015 at 7:54am

Carl, what's the latest on your kidney transplant and all other health related issues? You're holding out on us!

Comment by The Flying Atheist on December 6, 2015 at 9:15pm

Ian, at least you can now see the light at the end of the tunnel. You're doing a good thing by putting your own priorities first.  

Comment by Ian Mason on December 6, 2015 at 9:09am

Thanks, good people. The nice thing is I'll still be getting paid for 3 months afterwards. Then the hunt for a new job starts.

Comment by Randall Smith on December 6, 2015 at 7:56am

Gracious, Ian! That's not a good way to end your work (job) life. All I can say is hang in there. It won't be long. Then, FREEDOM!

Comment by Plinius on December 6, 2015 at 1:18am

Rooting for you, Ian! 

 

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