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Hang With Friends

Location: Earth
Members: 876
Latest Activity: 7 minutes ago

Come on in, pull up a chair!

Picture yourself spending some time with congenial friends, sharing your lives and pictures from your cell phones." They're curious about that cool game, song, movie, camping trip, art show, or other event that fascinated you. You talk about all kinds of stuff, poetry, styles, personal achievements, relationships, and bad days. You can share your inner child, and laugh together. They sympathetically listen to your feelings about serious topics like politics or climate change, even when they don't agree.

Personal validation comes from paying attention to one another, giving more than you get. Everyone respects you and themselves, despite our amazing range of personal tastes and interests. They'll tell you they don't agree with an idea or behavior without implying you're a bad person or somehow deficient. It's an "I'm OK, You're OK" kind of fellowship, where nobody tries to make himself look better by picking on somebody else.

Nobody here is into mind games. A discussion started with a loaded guilt-throwing question will be deleted.

This group is not intended to compete with other groups on topics they cover but to "fill in the cracks." Whenever a discussion dwells at length on a topic for which there's an existing group, we urge you to provide members a link to that group to continue along their tangent.

A comment is a shout-out, which will get lost in a few days, because the comment wall is just a random stack.

Please start a discussion to share stories, photos, and videos. Replies will pop up in your "latest activity" and a conversation can develop from the feelings and thoughts you contributed. Groups are built on discussions.

Discussion Forum

What Annoys God Most? (Betty Bowers)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Grinning Cat 20 hours ago. 10 Replies

Long story short, it's those near misses, the almost-but-not-quite, close but no cheroot moments, or, would you believe ... Near Death Experiences!  So what's the big deal?  Betty Bowers, America's BEST Christian and self-proclaimed expert on such…Continue

Tags: Near Death Experiences, America's Best Christian, Betty Bowers

degrading love — part one (TheraminTrees)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Grinning Cat Nov 22. 11 Replies

Love is by many considered among the highest of positive emotions.  Yet when love of the type offered by deities is examined, something seems to go seriously wrong.  The love of Yahweh seems less a gift than a demand, not so much beneficence as a…Continue

Tags: TheraminTrees, god, love

Ning, Error 500s, and Whether to Migrate

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Joan Denoo Nov 13. 47 Replies

I just got the following notice from Ning yesterday, (31 October, 2016), in the wake of this latest website outage:As some of you may be aware, we experienced a system outage earlier this morning. The cause was due to a specific network…Continue

Tags: downtime, Atheist Nexus, Ning

Introducing Douglas Murray

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Loren Miller Nov 7. 4 Replies

Most of us who have been around atheism for a while know the heavyweights of our ilk.  Names like Hitchens, Dawkins, Dennett, Harris, Dillahunty and AronRa get nearly daily mention in posts and discussions on Atheist Nexus.  One name I was…Continue

Tags: Agatan Foundation, Douglas Murray

If There's a God - She's a Woman - The Author T

Started by Joe. Last reply by Chris Nov 3. 4 Replies

I came across this story and thought some here might find it interesting and humorous.It’s titled:If There’s a GodShe’s a WomanFrom the Series:Things You Can Learn from a VaginaIts on the website TheAuthorT.com under the tab, “Free to Read…Continue

His Dark Materials and the Catholic Church

Started by Tonya R. Wheeler. Last reply by k.h. ky Oct 30. 35 Replies

I recently watched the movie, "The Golden Compass" and since I could not find the sequels, I read the books. I enjoyed them, and I will be reading the first one, Northern Lights, starting tomorrow, since it just arrived via inter-library…Continue

Tags: Fantasy, Catholic, Religion, Atheist, Pullman

Comment Wall

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Comment by Plinius on June 21, 2014 at 3:53pm

You should be proud of yourself, Sk8eycat, for living with an Aspie and for enduring what you can't escape from.

Your description is clearly of Asperger's, as far as I can see.

Comment by sk8eycat on June 21, 2014 at 2:57pm

Ever since I read the symptoms of Asperger's, I have been convinced that my (now) 69-year-old sister was born with it.  She's never been diagnosed because when we were children, nobody had ever heard of it, and she has been a JeeHoover's Witless since she was in her early 20s, and they don't "believe" in any kind of mind therapy. It's too late for her, anyway.

I have NEVER heard her say "please" or "thank you" to anybody for anything.  She hasn't had any tantrums lately, but she still occasionally whines about a 1st Grade teacher who she claims singled her out for ridicule.  It hasn't sunk into her mind that I had the same teacher when I was in 1st Grade, and she was that way to everybody.

My sister isn't stupid; she has a memory like a steel trap, but she focuses on trivia most of the time.

As for "sentimental children's shows,"  YESSSSS! 

I had always promised myself that I would find a way to "leave the building" as soon as Mother no longer needed me, but it's been 20 years, and I'm still breathing.  Today I'm not very happy about that.  Nor am I proud of myself.

Comment by Plinius on June 21, 2014 at 12:45pm

 Neglect or overprotection by a parent creates scar tissue that lasts a lifetime.

You saw that right, Joan, it lasts a lifetime, but there are ways to go on and flourish. Thanks for your love and support, but don't make me bigger than I am - I might blush!

And as you say: on to the tasks at hand!

Comment by Joan Denoo on June 21, 2014 at 11:44am

Chris, these complexities hurt at such a deep level. Neglect or overprotection by a parent creates scar tissue that lasts a lifetime. Your care and concern and respect for your husband is well placed and you share his burden with good sense. Yes, the questions touch into a deep place and your answer is not long. It appears you read the situation well and make a difference in your husband's life.

Growing up in a mentally healthy environment can be a rare thing, and replacing the dysfunction with well thought out remedies and caring action helps to bring about a better future.

Thank you for your honesty, and for your great heart. We all benefit by having people around us such as yourself. Know that you are not alone, and that we support you in any way we can.

OK! Now on to the tasks at hand.

 

Comment by Plinius on June 21, 2014 at 11:10am

Deep question, Joan! My husband is the elder brother, and like the eldest, he feels responsible. Mother-in-law loved children but couldn't handle them at all: she neglected the first one, overprotected the second one (the Asperger), and lost the third one when he went to play on the railroad tracks with friends - 4 years old. I think the family survived rather than lived after that.    I have a deep respect for my husband that he never abandoned his family even when they hurt him, and I encouraged him to grow and get strong and confident. I fully understand that he saw no other possibility to handle the family situation. The last one of his family is b-i-l, and it's impossible to change that one.

A deep question, and perhaps a longer answer than you wanted.

Comment by Joan Denoo on June 21, 2014 at 10:36am

How does your husband handle the disrespect from his brother? Ouch! that must hurt! Is your husband younger than his brother and was he disrespected as they grew into adulthood?

Comment by Plinius on June 21, 2014 at 10:29am

Yes - you can choose your partner and the in-laws are extra. B-i-l can't help that he doesn't understand love, empathy, sympathy and respect, but I keep wondering why he always watches old sentimental children's series...

Comment by Joan Denoo on June 21, 2014 at 10:02am

Is b-i-l your husband's brother? 

Comment by Plinius on June 21, 2014 at 2:12am

Oh, then my husband would struggle on on his own. I see what it does to us, to be treated without respect or sympathy, like a thing without feeling. We get orders from the patient, but never thanks. I've known b-i-l for 37 years now; if we don't see him very often all goes well, but all that changed when he got that accident. We just have to work on for two months longer and then I'm going to ration the contact again. You can say that b-i-l is a patient, and that is true, but there's a limit to what I can handle.

Comment by Joan Denoo on June 21, 2014 at 1:30am

Plinius, I hear you! What is the worst that would happen if you just closed the door on this chapter of your life?

 

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