Hang With Friends

Location: Earth
Members: 854
Latest Activity: 42 minutes ago

Come on in, pull up a chair!

Picture yourself spending some time with congenial friends, sharing your lives and pictures from your cell phones." They're curious about that cool game, song, movie, camping trip, art show, or other event that fascinated you. You talk about all kinds of stuff, poetry, styles, personal achievements, relationships, and bad days. You can share your inner child, and laugh together. They sympathetically listen to your feelings about serious topics like politics or climate change, even when they don't agree.

Personal validation comes from paying attention to one another, giving more than you get. Everyone respects you and themselves, despite our amazing range of personal tastes and interests. They'll tell you they don't agree with an idea or behavior without implying you're a bad person or somehow deficient. It's an "I'm OK, You're OK" kind of fellowship, where nobody tries to make himself look better by picking on somebody else.

Nobody here is into mind games. A discussion started with a loaded guilt-throwing question will be deleted.

This group is not intended to compete with other groups on topics they cover but to "fill in the cracks." Whenever a discussion dwells at length on a topic for which there's an existing group, we urge you to provide members a link to that group to continue along their tangent.

A comment is a shout-out, which will get lost in a few days, because the comment wall is just a random stack.

Please start a discussion to share stories, photos, and videos. Replies will pop up in your "latest activity" and a conversation can develop from the feelings and thoughts you contributed. Groups are built on discussions.

Discussion Forum

maggie and milly and molly and may (Edward Estlin Cummings & Eric Whitacre)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Loren Miller Nov 20. 2 Replies

It's amazing what you discover when you go looking for something you had no idea you'd find.  On an impulse, I pulled up Eric Whitacre's website to see if he had created any new pieces.  It would seem that he has: a song cycle called The City and…Continue

Tags: e e cummings, Eric Whitacre

There Is Only One Way to Destroy ISIS

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Randall Smith Nov 18. 1 Reply

There Is Only One Way to Destroy ISISGrowth in population, policies and practices that create a gap between the typical person and the wealthy,…Continue

Passive and Active voices

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner Nov 16. 1 Reply

Have you noticed that much of the discussion in families and with friends, in the print media, on TV, and now on the internet is in the Passive Voice? Many people whine, complain, gripe, accuse, blame, call names, ridicule, grumble, bitch, rebuke,…Continue

Tags: and, behaviors, communication., attitudes, learned

Detroit Businesswomen Team Up to Get Rape Kits Tested

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by The Flying Atheist Nov 14. 2 Replies

Detroit Businesswomen Team Up to Get Rape Kits Tested"In 2009, a Wayne County assistant prosecuting attorney noticed…Continue

Tags: women, Enough, SAID, black, victims

Something Beautiful – Nathan Phelps & Seth Andrews

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Loren Miller Nov 10. 7 Replies

And it is beautiful, too, indeed, I think some of Seth Andrews' best work.  Interesting point: rather than Seth's dulcet baritone doing the narration, this piece presses Nathan Phelps' deep bass intonation into service, bringing a different flavor…Continue

Tags: Nathan Phelps, The Thinking Atheist, Seth Andrews, beautiful, something

Your favorite photobombs?

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by Joan Denoo Oct 27. 14 Replies

Running of the bulls photobomb.Continue

Comment Wall


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Comment by Joan Denoo on July 22, 2013 at 7:49am
Chris, I agree that people hate to face what is happening. I like your statement, “I think there will be more grassroots groups that work together and share - initiatives that help people and society.”
Therein lie the possible solutions, individuals gathering with others in a common effort to solve problems and resolve conflicts.
We know what doesn’t work: primitive belief in supernatural powers, prayers to a non-existent god, looking for others to rescue us from our follies.
Most of us have what we need to think and imagine, explore, experiment, and take focused action. Most of us have the power to create a lifestyle that we can support through our own efforts.
The institutions of our culture, i.e. family, religion, education, health care, banking and financial markets, and government sometimes get in the way of empowering individuals to flourish.
Finding and developing each one’s internal wisdom, learning new skills, taking responsibility for ourselves, supporting each other, these are the things that will pull us out of the present depression.
As atheists, we have shucked one of the elements that keep us bound. Free of mind-bindings, we can explore, not the probabilities, but the possibilities.
My preference is to live in a just society with laws applying to each person individually. I prefer a culture that values empowerment of individuals.
My job today is to overwhelm the cancer cells in my body. While sitting quietly, I can imagine and dream away the hours of ways to build community. Multi-tasking is very familiar to me.
6:00 AM and I am out to pick raspberries for breakfast. Life doesn't get much better than that.
Comment by Plinius on July 22, 2013 at 12:53am


when people tell you that you're negative, they know that you're right, but they just hate it that you're realistic.

Comment by Plinius on July 22, 2013 at 12:48am

The modern, western-style of over-consumption has not only become our normal standard of living but also an expected human right, any negative consequences be damned

But here, as in the USA, there are many people forced to rationing by poverty. They cannot use creditcards and they always are out of money before the month is over. But I don't expect outbreaks of anarchy - at most more 'proletarian shopping'. I think there will be more grassroots groups that work together and share - initiatives that help people and society.

I grew up in the 50s and I learned frugal living right from the start. For me it's not so difficult to economize when my income goes down, but for younger people...

Comment by The Flying Atheist on July 21, 2013 at 9:21pm

Felaine, that Apple Soup sounds very delicious.  Thanks for chiming in.  I've been thinking about you and I hope you're well. 

Comment by The Flying Atheist on July 21, 2013 at 9:17pm

While I do love the luxuries of modern life, by no means do I live an extravagant lifestyle.  Maybe it's because I'm not wealthy, but I also live a pretty frugal lifestyle.  I have no desire to keep up with the Joneses.  I recycle and I buy frugally.  When I do make "major" purchases, I tend to buy items that will last longer but may cost more.  It saves money overall.  This way I can enjoy the nicer things in life.  I also have a knack for making things last a long time by taking care of items properly.  I'm still using my Sony CD player and DBX stereo speakers that I bought in 1988!!  They were both rather expensive at the time and have served me very well.  I'm not one to constantly update just to have the latest gizmos. 

I do have items that I splurge on, mainly food and items for my hobbies.  I certainly love the pleasures of good food, and my hobbies give me a lot of personal satisfaction in my life.  If I were wealthy (mufti-millionaire wealthy) I really don't think I would be a "conspicuous consumption" type of person.  It's just not my style.  I do know that I would be very philanthropic with my fortune.  That is my style.    

Comment by Joan Denoo on July 21, 2013 at 9:04pm

Our group is well informed on the challenges facing USA and Earth  today and has taken steps to prepare for whatever happens, whether it is an economic collapse or a precipitous weather change.  If neither one occurs, then we have lost nothing. If these or other factors catch us off guard we are flexible and adaptive. 

There is no substitute for simple pleasures, and wonder only requires being aware of all the diversity around us. We have not had the scorching heat and humidity that so many experience; for that I am grateful. 

“Money has never made man happy, nor will it, there is nothing in its nature to produce happiness. The more of it one has the more one wants.”

~ Benjamin Franklin


Comment by sk8eycat on July 21, 2013 at 8:08pm

I don't want to interrupt, because this is a fascinating discussion (has anybody else noticed that the US economy started to slide when Nixon slashed NASA's budget ...while he was on the phone with Armstron & Aldrin!  We've never really recovered from that.)

Anyway, I've been playing  with fall recipes:

Recipe developed by The Serpent

2          Cups               Apple Juice or Cider

2          Large              Cooking Apples; peeled, cored, coarsely chopped

¼         Cup                 Raisins

2          Sticks             Cinnamon     

2                                  Whole Allspice  (optional)

2          Tbsp               Brown Sugar

1          Tbsp               GOOD Brandy (NOT  “cooking brandy”)

In large saucepan, combine apple juice, apples, raisins, cinnamon, and allspice.  Bring to slow boil; reduce heat, cover, and simmer 15 to 20 minutes until apples are tender. 

Stir in brown sugar and brandy and simmer, stirring occasionally, until sugar is completely dissolved.  Remove cinnamon and allspice and discard. 

Can be served warm or chilled with smoky ham slices, cheddar cheese, crackers, crusty bread, etc., on the side.  (Cheese biscuits?) 

For a different texture, after removing cinnamon and allspice, puree’ in blender.


Comment by Joan Denoo on July 21, 2013 at 2:10pm

Patricia, I like you joining in the "Pissed Off crowd. We are becoming legion. 

Comment by Joan Denoo on July 21, 2013 at 2:04pm

Carl, I agree with your assessment and comparison with WWII limits on our consumption. Yes, we all have enjoyed these years of prosperity that grew from 1945 to 1975. The wage gap began to grow in 1975 and then grew exponentially until we are in the mess we are in now.
I think you are correct that people will resist voluntarily cutting back on consumption. The problem is, Earth cannot sustain our present consumption levels in the USA, and other countries are getting into positions to be able to afford increased consumption after all those low paying jobs went to Third World Counties where low pay was better than in the feudal days of their slavery or serfdom.  

There are problems at all levels of our society, economic, educational, health care, financial, political and religious. People don't want to give up privileges; others want to have access to opportunities. These conflicting values work against the kinds of changes we need to make. 

So, what is one to do? I don't have the power to change things that need to change; I do have the power to act and speak in ways that influence some, if not all. 

I get really annoyed when people tell me I am too negative. I think there are too many who are not negative enough. Being negative is only the beginning of problem solving. One has to acknowledge there is a problem before one can even imagine a preferred future. If one lives in denial or delusions, he and she become part of the problem.  

Therefore, 1. we need a time and place to be discerning, to name the problem, to describe events, to do some critical thinking;

2. then we need a time and place to imagine a preferred future, with no limits on the imagining, no criticizing, no setting of limits;

3. after that comes the time to be critical, what options have the highest probability of getting from where we are to where we want to be? what resources do we need? and lack? how are we going to develop a budget? who does what, when, where?

4. Develop an action plan and put the plan to work;

5. Evaluate outcomes asking are we reaching our goals? Do we need to do more or less of the same? or do something differently?  or do nothing? 

Underlying all these problems, in my opinion, is religion. Even those who do not believe one religion or another, many people fall into line of the religious leaders who call for preposterous rules and laws. Those who claim authority over others because of traditions only add fuel to the already smoldering fire. 

For me, Atheist Nexus and other groups that support secular thinking offer the times and places for discussion.  Life without god seems right to me. 


Comment by Joan Denoo on July 21, 2013 at 1:23pm
Ruth, very good point, "I don’t think fear of rejection keeps people in long term relationships."

My fear when leaving religion behind was that I would not have as good a support system. I didn't think in terms of having a healthier one. After leaving, finding friends to share my thoughts developed, slowly at first, and when all is said and done, I am far healthier with healthy friends and family.

My fear when leaving my marriage was that I would be alone, unable to cope with three small children, and I would never travel again. All those faux-fears never materialized. I have never been as lonely as when I was married; my children began to thrive without the brutal hand of ebedience training; and I was able to do research in 32 nations after my divorce.

By facing my fears, thinking for myself, paying attention to outcomes, I was able to not only survive but thrive.

Thanks for the opportunity to rethink my previous comment.

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