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Hang With Friends

Location: Earth
Members: 877
Latest Activity: 7 hours ago

Come on in, pull up a chair!

Picture yourself spending some time with congenial friends, sharing your lives and pictures from your cell phones." They're curious about that cool game, song, movie, camping trip, art show, or other event that fascinated you. You talk about all kinds of stuff, poetry, styles, personal achievements, relationships, and bad days. You can share your inner child, and laugh together. They sympathetically listen to your feelings about serious topics like politics or climate change, even when they don't agree.

Personal validation comes from paying attention to one another, giving more than you get. Everyone respects you and themselves, despite our amazing range of personal tastes and interests. They'll tell you they don't agree with an idea or behavior without implying you're a bad person or somehow deficient. It's an "I'm OK, You're OK" kind of fellowship, where nobody tries to make himself look better by picking on somebody else.

Nobody here is into mind games. A discussion started with a loaded guilt-throwing question will be deleted.

This group is not intended to compete with other groups on topics they cover but to "fill in the cracks." Whenever a discussion dwells at length on a topic for which there's an existing group, we urge you to provide members a link to that group to continue along their tangent.

A comment is a shout-out, which will get lost in a few days, because the comment wall is just a random stack.

Please start a discussion to share stories, photos, and videos. Replies will pop up in your "latest activity" and a conversation can develop from the feelings and thoughts you contributed. Groups are built on discussions.

Discussion Forum

Men who challenge men to stop violence

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Idaho Spud Jan 9. 19 Replies

Many men join in the effort to reduce violence against women and children and other men. He speaks of the need to place responsibility on men instead of focusing on women to stop violence. He offers a breath of fresh air, as do so many of the men on…Continue

Ian, a beautiful New Years blessing.

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Chris Jan 5. 7 Replies

Ian, for some reason, my comment would not "send" on Hang with Friends; perhaps it will here!Ian, a beautiful New Years blessing. It goes in my file. I especially like the thought of surprising myself. Laura made a special trip to my Spokane home to…Continue

degrading love — part two (TheraminTrees)

Started by Loren Miller Jan 1. 0 Replies

TheraminTrees set up religion with his left in Part One of his treatise on how religion demeans and degrades the value of love.  Here in Part Two, he brings in a devastating, "Mike Tyson" right, which negates and invalidates any claim that either…Continue

Tags: Christianity, Islam, TheraminTrees, god, love

The Ark Encounter: A Less than Grand Opening (The Thinking Atheist)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Idaho Spud Dec 31, 2016. 27 Replies

The day finally arrived.  Ken Ham's Ark Encounter opened on 7 July, 2016 ... to something a bit less than Disney-sized crowds, and more than a couple dissenting voices!  Seth Andrews has gathered a quartet of significant participants in the protest…Continue

Tags: Tracey Moody, Dan Broadbent, Seth Andrews, David Silverman, AronRa

Learning a Language as a Mature Adult

Started by Daniel W. Last reply by Idaho Spud Dec 14, 2016. 27 Replies

Trying to keep my mind exercised, and not interested in most of the reading materials that I can find.I decided to attempt to learn a language.  Actually, two.  The dilemma is, how do I do that without going to school - not an option - and without…Continue

What Annoys God Most? (Betty Bowers)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Grinning Cat Dec 7, 2016. 10 Replies

Long story short, it's those near misses, the almost-but-not-quite, close but no cheroot moments, or, would you believe ... Near Death Experiences!  So what's the big deal?  Betty Bowers, America's BEST Christian and self-proclaimed expert on such…Continue

Tags: Near Death Experiences, America's Best Christian, Betty Bowers

Comment Wall

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You need to be a member of Hang With Friends to add comments!

Comment by Bertold Brautigan on January 27, 2016 at 11:11am

On the arthritis front, I don't want to do a Dr. Oz here, but years ago I noticed significant stiffness in my knuckles. I read about a supplement that was new at the time called SAM-e. Time mag ran a big article about it back then, claiming it's a natural substance our bodies produce less of as we age. I've been taking it ever since and the symptoms in my knuckles have all but vanished.

Randall, my parents were divorced when I was 11. It seemed quite devastating at the time, but my mom didn't have a lot of choice. Our dad beat the crap out of us on the rare occasions when he was sober and beat the crap out of our mom on the more normal occasions when he was drunk. Of course my mom's boss, a stalwart Catholic orthodontist, promptly fired her because getting a divorce wasn't proper.

In your position I think I would open the door to your children to let them know you're willing to talk if they want to, and leave the choice up to them.

Comment by Joan Denoo on January 27, 2016 at 10:34am

Randy, I agree with Chris, "start by telling them something about your own feelings during that time," and listen for an answer. Prepare yourself beforehand to hear what you may not want to hear. If so, don't become defensive, acknowledge whatever you hear. Pay attention to how you feel and describe your feelings without laying blame. You have a right to stand tall and proud of raising your daughters as a single parent. 

Comment by Joan Denoo on January 27, 2016 at 10:18am

Chris, the painting perfectly reflects our group and makes me laugh.

Comment by The Flying Atheist on January 27, 2016 at 10:09am

That's a great picture, Chris.  I think it represents us very well.  Many of us have lost some of our physicality but not our attitude.

Always nice to hear stories of happy pets.  I wish Dito well.

 

Randy, I think Chris is absolutely correct.  Talking is almost always better.  Perhaps a good way to breach the topic is to tell them how glad you are to see them as happy, grown adults, and that you were worried for them at times because of the divorce.  Like Chris said, that's a good way to open up the subject. 

Comment by Plinius on January 27, 2016 at 8:48am

Scary, but talking is almost always better. You could start by telling them something about your own feelings during that time, to let them know the subject is open. 

Comment by Randall Smith on January 27, 2016 at 7:40am

Love it, Chris! 

Ruth, I've tried creams, pain relievers, fish oil, glucosamine, etc., for my arthritis, but nothing seems to work. I read where eliminating eating wheat products helps, but it doesn't. It's aggravating--fortunately, not life threatening.

On another note, I just finished reading When Parents Part, and I need some advice. My four adult children (ages 33-42) are products of divorced parents when they were approximately 6 to 15 years old. I was the custodial parent (rare for the father). I have visited all of them in the past several months, and they appear to be quite happy, with no apparent scars from having to go through a less than normal childhood. My question is, should I ask them about how they felt during that time in their lives, or just let it go? Perhaps, dredging up memories might not be a good idea, but then again, maybe they would like to talk about those times. For the most part, the subject has never been mentioned. I don't want them to think I don't care about their feelings, both then and now. 

Comment by Plinius on January 27, 2016 at 6:14am

Thanks for the wishes! There's no news about Dido yet, but he seems to feel good. When I came home an hour ago, he was so happy that he started to bounce against the walls of the corridor, happy mad jumps that leave footprints almost a metre high on the walls. And I'm the sloppy kind of housekeeper who smiles at those prints.

How's this for a picture of ourselves?

Comment by Joan Denoo on January 27, 2016 at 12:14am

Chris, sad news about your feet, knees and hips hurting. I know you use the public transit, but did you have to walk far to carry Dido to the vet? The alarming weight loss points to something; I hope you discover what caused the change.  

We do have to make changes as we get older to protect ourselves. After all, our muscles change as do our balance and stamina. I just kind of "putz" through my days, doing most everything in slow motion. 

My darling great-granddaughter, Katelynn, comes to help me walk to the greenhouse through snow and ice. I instruct her that if I fall, she is not to try to get me up but to go for help. Her mom and dad are trained as volunteer firefighters, as is Laura. They have incredible skills caring for people. 

Comment by Loren Miller on January 26, 2016 at 4:54pm

Chris, best wishes to your kitty, Dido!  I know it'd tear out my heart to lose any of our five.

Comment by Ruth Anthony-Gardner on January 26, 2016 at 4:39pm

Sorry to hear about Dido, Plinius. I try to avoid carrying Trissa, who weighs 22 lbs. So often we don’t know we’re overdoing it till later. I had to start using a cane after carrying around rocks a few days for garden improvement. Didn’t feel it till later.

I hope your good health continues forever, Randall. For osteoarthritis, I’ve found that not only pharmaceutical grade fish oil helps but Dr.Theo’s Avosoy Complete. It’s not only salt free glucosamine and chondroitin but has avocado-sybean unsaponifiables. I’d read about the latter ingredient in research literature many years ago. I don’t’ think they know how it helps, just that it does. About two years ago their supplier failed Dr. Theo’s independent analysis (he has high standards and tests every batch), so it was unavailable for about a month. After two weeks without (just using another glucosamine/chondroitin product) my arthritis got much worse. I was so glad when it was available again.

Loren, Ian, Plinius, Bertold and Flying Atheist, you seem to be the kids of our core group. Younger people join Hang With Friends but don’t post as often.  It is essential to be conscious of one’s changing body and take precautions. Keep it up.

“Wonderfully tasteless décor” made me laugh. I can appreciate that aesthetic.

 

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