Comment

Comment by Joan Denoo on October 22, 2015 at 1:04pm

Randy, I know what it feels like to be happy to be home. 

Comment by Joan Denoo on October 22, 2015 at 1:01pm

Today would have been Sk8eycat's 76th birthday. Felaine, I miss you. 

Comment by Randall Smith on October 22, 2015 at 7:43am

Cooincidently enough, my daughter is also a "Laura". I'm not sure whether she should thank me for coming out, or me thanking her for accommodating me. I guess nothing needs said. It is nice to be home.

Comment by Joan Denoo on October 21, 2015 at 12:59pm

Carl, thank you for your warm comments. I do enjoy being with you and each of the Atheist Nexus friends. My intention is to keep in touch with you and look forward to reading your posts. The cold weather drives me inside and I enjoy writing and sharing my thoughts. We have frosts many nights now. The greenhouse fills with the aromas of citrus in bloom and the greens from the warm, moist produce provides us with delicious flavors every evening.  

Comment by Joan Denoo on October 21, 2015 at 12:52pm

Randy, Laura married a real jerk! I dreaded going to their home or having them visit me. Larry was like the proverbial sexist, racist, bigot of the worst kind. At some point in their marriage, Laura told him to change his attitudes and behaviors or get out. Because her business brings in at least as much as his business, he had a financial loss facing him. Besides, Laura is an outstanding woman (not prejudiced, of course). Long story, short, Larry took some communication courses through Landmark and made an excellent adjustment. He continues to be honest and make clear statements of what he is thinking and wanting. A person knows where he/she stands on any topic; the difference is, he can listen to other points of view. He no longer sees an issue as being black or white but recognizes there exist variable shades of gray.

He owns his own fears and does not assume that his fears will result in some doom and gloom state of affairs. Instead, he looks at fear as an opportunity to reframe his experience. Instead of "bitching" about the world, he thinks and acts in ways that make life better for us all. His favorite phrase, "Let's get 'er did!" offers an invitation to work as a team. My cancer seemed to aid him in this aspect of his life. We took on my challenge as a team effort and he contributed greatly to my recovery.

He is nicer to himself and much nicer to others. He doesn't have to be "right" and everyone else "wrong". He takes pride in his work and skills in technology and admits to being a "jerk" when he falls back into the blame game. He inspires others to think and act to a far greater capacity anyone, even themselves, realize.

Probably the most valuable attribute he gained is a sense of humor that builds people up. Before, his greatest pleasure was putting people down. 

I love the guy, he has a big heart, spends thought and action to make life better for himself and those around him. When it became clear I am no longer able to maintain my big old home and needed more help, he had a greenhouse and tool shed built for me, he and Laura saw to it that a room in their home is comfortable for me and make me feel welcome every single day. 

I hope your daughter has the strength and power to set limits and boundaries with her husband. I think she will be healthier and happier if/when she does. So will you! 

Dominic and I are off to walk the perimeter of the cleared area and refresh the bird feeders. Randy, I hope your day is just splendid!

Comment by The Flying Atheist on October 21, 2015 at 9:32am

Welcome back, Randy.  I guess next time you travel you'll reconsider the sleeper car? 

Your flight was delayed in Chicago?  I'm very surprised.  [sarcasm]

Joan, we love you and want you all to ourselves, but we grant you permission to spend time away from us and play with your great-grandchildren.  :)

Ian, I'm always impressed (and a bit jealous) of all the wonderful cultural events you attend.  And such a vast variety.

Comment by Randall Smith on October 21, 2015 at 7:50am

I have returned from visiting two of my children (and one grandchild) in Sac. Calif. It was pleasant enough, although I could do without my son-in-law, a real jerk and ne'er-do-well. I gave my daughter the "Dear Abby" message: "Would you be better off with or without him?" She's thinking.

The 3 day Amtrak trip out was no picnic. Very disappointing and tiring, not at all relaxing. I did meet some nice people, however. All the good scenery (Rockies, N. Calif, etc.) were unseen due to nighttime travel.

My airplane flight back was delayed in Chicago, which created self-stress, phone calls, blah, blah. I think I'm better off just staying home!

Comment by Joan Denoo on October 21, 2015 at 4:25am

Comment by Joan Denoo on October 21, 2015 at 4:14am

It feels nice to be missed, even though I have been reading as many of the Atheist Nexus posts as I can. I come to my room after dinner and start reading my mail and before I am aware, I am fast asleep. I sleep very soundly and feel nicely refreshed in the morning. The dogs bowl me over with their enthusiasm and we have a good walk-about the property every morning filling the bird feeders. Beautiful blue jays and woodpeckers and chickadees often greet us waiting for their wild bird food. A huge flock of turkeys come through every now and then. I haven't seen deer in days even though the population is very large. Hunting season starts soon and I hate the thought of Bambi and his mother being in danger. We have coyotes that sometimes wake me at night with their yipping and a cougar continues to leave evidence of being around. We keep a real eye on the kids, dogs and cats, although we would be virtually helpless if a big cat were hungry. The chickens have a safe roost ,,, I hope. 

Comment by Joan Denoo on October 21, 2015 at 3:35am

Yes, Ruth, I am still here, only very busy with playing with my great-grandkids, helping them with their homework, cooking up hearty meals, helping get a chicken coop ready to keep the family in fresh eggs and tending the greenhouse. The salads taste so very fresh as I pick them just before serving dinner. The kids rave about how much they like salads and we all wait anxiously for the zucchini to bear its treasures. There are dozens of squash forming on one plant, the tomatoes have blossoms as do the beans and peas. We have a Meyers lemon with nine blossoms turning into very tiny lemons. The Clementine orange tree hasn't bloomed yet. Adults in the family use the chainsaw to delimb the fallen trees and the kids and I form the slash into long ditches Travis digs with a backhoe across the hill where they will be buried into hugelkulturs. 

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