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Hang With Friends

Location: Earth
Members: 850
Latest Activity: 4 hours ago

Come on in, pull up a chair!

Picture yourself spending some time with congenial friends, sharing your lives and pictures from your cell phones." They're curious about that cool game, song, movie, camping trip, art show, or other event that fascinated you. You talk about all kinds of stuff, poetry, styles, personal achievements, relationships, and bad days. You can share your inner child, and laugh together. They sympathetically listen to your feelings about serious topics like politics or climate change, even when they don't agree.

Personal validation comes from paying attention to one another, giving more than you get. Everyone respects you and themselves, despite our amazing range of personal tastes and interests. They'll tell you they don't agree with an idea or behavior without implying you're a bad person or somehow deficient. It's an "I'm OK, You're OK" kind of fellowship, where nobody tries to make himself look better by picking on somebody else.

Nobody here is into mind games. A discussion started with a loaded guilt-throwing question will be deleted.

This group is not intended to compete with other groups on topics they cover but to "fill in the cracks." Whenever a discussion dwells at length on a topic for which there's an existing group, we urge you to provide members a link to that group to continue along their tangent.

A comment is a shout-out, which will get lost in a few days, because the comment wall is just a random stack.

Please start a discussion to share stories, photos, and videos. Replies will pop up in your "latest activity" and a conversation can develop from the feelings and thoughts you contributed. Groups are built on discussions.

Discussion Forum

Steven Weinberg on his anti-theism

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Loren Miller 4 hours ago. 4 Replies

I like the sound of Steven Weinberg's voice. He has a calming impact on me as I rush to get my home of 41 years ready to sell and plan and put into motion the new garden at my daughter's home. My home is full o empty boxed quickly filling with the…Continue

Goodwill to Few Men (Betty Bowers)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Donald R Barbera Jul 23. 3 Replies

Think Goodwill Industries does well by the poor?  Fact is, they do WAY BETTER for themselves, to the point where America's Best Christian, Betty Bowers, thinks they're ripping off the christian playbook a bit too well!  Have a look for yourself:…Continue

Tags: ripoff, Goodwill Industries, America's Best Christian, Betty Bowers

Your favorite photobombs?

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by Plinius Jul 10. 12 Replies

Running of the bulls photobomb.Continue

losing faith (TheraminTrees)

Started by Loren Miller Jul 5. 0 Replies

TheraminTrees has recently begun producing a new series of YouTube videos, which added to a wonderful library of earlier observations regarding his experience of religion. Good as all those pieces are, I personally think they pale against this…Continue

Tags: story, history, faith, TheraminTrees

Betty Explains Religious Freedom (Betty Bowers)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner Jul 3. 10 Replies

Well, considering all the RFRA bills popping up all over the United States, plus all the fun and games ISIS is bringing to the good folks in Syria and Iraq, Betty Bowers, the epitome of well-dressed christianity, has decided to clarify the true…Continue

Tags: persecution, ISIS, Religious Freedom, America's Best Christian, Betty Bowers

Surreal, I haz it

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner May 6. 82 Replies

Surreal, not just found in art.Continue

Tags: surreal

Comment Wall

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Comment by Steph S. on April 25, 2014 at 4:23pm

Mindy she sounds like a shallow "friend" - I don't think you should take her back as friend. I think the time has passed and you are older and more mature now. Look forward to better friends in the future who like you for who you are.

Comment by Joan Denoo on April 25, 2014 at 3:05pm

Mindy, You are just very fine! What you feel is what you feel and you can honor that without guilt. If you want her for a friend, by all means make that choice. If you don't want to, or not now, make that choice. You don't have to explain anything. Just make your statement and go on with life. 
About the anxiety attack, a good counselor can help you with that. Basically, sit quietly, paying attention to your breath. When a thought comes to mind, thank it for visiting and dismiss it away. It takes a lot of practice to get to the point where you can just sit, relaxed, breathing easily, and letting go of thoughts. That static in your mind can wear you out. 

Mindfulness Strategies

I like Chris' response: a hug, even virtual, is coming your way from me and I am sure all of us on this string. 

Ruth gives very good advice, and based on healthy communication skills. She is right on target about being honest with yourself and then letting her know. 

Patricia always has strong responses and, by golly, she is right. I really like what she said. You are who you are. Period.

Felaine has good sense as well ... goodness, we are lucky to have such trustworthy and wise friends. She advises using the Block button on Facebook and that is a great idea.

So, you have a lot of options and even more if you need to find a better way. However, there are some good options here to kick around. You are not a victim. You have everything you need to come out of this a winner. Sit back, enjoy that you have breath, celebrate your life, and experience the gratitude of strong family and friends. 

I just read your response and it seems you have been able to quiet your thoughts and get your anxiety down. Remember, anxiety is a symptom of feeling helpless. To feel optimistic is the goal. The method to achieve your goal lies within the symptoms. Look for mad, glad, sad, afraid, guilt, shame and you will usually find the cause of your anxiety. 
 

Comment by Idaho Spud on April 25, 2014 at 3:03pm

See ya Patricia.  Have fun.

Comment by sk8eycat on April 25, 2014 at 1:58pm

Mindy, friendship, like love, should be unconditional. 

If somebody places conditions on how they should behave toward you, they are NOT True Friends.  DUMP THEM!  I have done that several times in the past 50+ years, and it may have hurt at first (but it usually hurt because they had done something to hurt me and/or mine), but it made life much easier in the long run.

You are a GOOD person, but you worry too much!  If you need FlakeBook to keep in touch with your extended family, limit it to just them, and block everyone else...if that can be done.

That site makes me very nervous; IMO it's useless except for small commercial and non-profit (animal rescue) enterprises.  I'm usually a very private person; I don't want Jack Schidt and his 10,000,000 friends to know what I'm thinking and doing...or not doing. I stick to e-mail to stay in touch. 

And this place.

Comment by Ruth Anthony-Gardner on April 25, 2014 at 10:59am

booklover, it sounds to me as if you miss being young and thin. I agree that a friend shallow enough to insist that you lose weight to be her bridesmaid might not be attractive. There's a possibility that she's matured. Were I in your situation, I'd tell her the real reason you don't seek her company, and how much her insisting that you lose weight to be her bridesmaid had hurt. Explain how you need friends that validate what's important to you now. Ask if she still has that attitude which so offended you.

Even if you reject her proposal to be a friend, it's healthier to be honest about why. You don't need to make excuses. We're proud of you just as you are.

Comment by Plinius on April 25, 2014 at 10:51am

You don't need advice Mindy, just a hug. You're doing all right! (((HUG)))

Comment by sk8eycat on April 24, 2014 at 8:28pm

Oh, Joan....thank you!  I'm still chuckling, but when I first figured out "Southern Tenant Farmers Union" I bellowed with laughter, and frightened poor Pumpkin off my lap. He's back, but not lying down...he stands on my bony thighs, and sticks his tail (a flagpole) up my nose.

And you said you had no sense of humor...Hah!

That's a keeper!

Comment by Joan Denoo on April 24, 2014 at 8:04pm

sk8eycat , what has the Southern Tenant Farmers' Union got to do with Patricia's trip?

Oh, I looked it up. Thanks. Didn't know that!

Comment by Steph S. on April 24, 2014 at 5:59pm

Love the beautiful pictures and videos you all have been posting. Hectic here - but end of semester will be here soon. Then summer time. It is starting to really warm up here. Finally able to get outside and bike more. This summer I hope to go hiking at more state parks.

Comment by sk8eycat on April 24, 2014 at 4:52pm

Patricia: If I'm being too nosy, tell me to STFU.  Is there no rail service between your home town and Prince George?

I am so disgusted with the lack of "small town" rail connections in the USA any more.  I mean...Pasadena, CA is not exactly a small town, but Amtrak closed the (historic) station and removed the tracks almost 20 years ago.  They also closed the station where I used to board the Coast Starlight (to go to Oregon & Washington) about 10 years ago, and moved it to another, inconvenient stop at the other end of the valley.

I'm sorry...I just think rail travel is more ecologically sound, economical, and much more comfortable and enjoyable than any other method.  But it sure ain't as great as it was 55+ years ago!

 

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