Hang With Friends

Location: Earth
Members: 854
Latest Activity: 5 hours ago

Come on in, pull up a chair!

Picture yourself spending some time with congenial friends, sharing your lives and pictures from your cell phones." They're curious about that cool game, song, movie, camping trip, art show, or other event that fascinated you. You talk about all kinds of stuff, poetry, styles, personal achievements, relationships, and bad days. You can share your inner child, and laugh together. They sympathetically listen to your feelings about serious topics like politics or climate change, even when they don't agree.

Personal validation comes from paying attention to one another, giving more than you get. Everyone respects you and themselves, despite our amazing range of personal tastes and interests. They'll tell you they don't agree with an idea or behavior without implying you're a bad person or somehow deficient. It's an "I'm OK, You're OK" kind of fellowship, where nobody tries to make himself look better by picking on somebody else.

Nobody here is into mind games. A discussion started with a loaded guilt-throwing question will be deleted.

This group is not intended to compete with other groups on topics they cover but to "fill in the cracks." Whenever a discussion dwells at length on a topic for which there's an existing group, we urge you to provide members a link to that group to continue along their tangent.

A comment is a shout-out, which will get lost in a few days, because the comment wall is just a random stack.

Please start a discussion to share stories, photos, and videos. Replies will pop up in your "latest activity" and a conversation can develop from the feelings and thoughts you contributed. Groups are built on discussions.

Discussion Forum

Mental health in the age of violence: Dr. Elliott Ingersol

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Randall Smith 5 hours ago. 1 Reply

I literally just discovered Dr. Elliott Ingersol yesterday, as a part of a discussion I had with other members of the Northern Ohio Freethought Society.  Dr. Ingersol is a licensed psychologist and clinical counselor in Ohio, as well as a professor…Continue

Tags: talk, psychotropic, therapy, psychology, Elliott Ingersol

maggie and milly and molly and may (Edward Estlin Cummings & Eric Whitacre)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Loren Miller Nov 20. 2 Replies

It's amazing what you discover when you go looking for something you had no idea you'd find.  On an impulse, I pulled up Eric Whitacre's website to see if he had created any new pieces.  It would seem that he has: a song cycle called The City and…Continue

Tags: e e cummings, Eric Whitacre

There Is Only One Way to Destroy ISIS

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Randall Smith Nov 18. 1 Reply

There Is Only One Way to Destroy ISISGrowth in population, policies and practices that create a gap between the typical person and the wealthy,…Continue

Passive and Active voices

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner Nov 16. 1 Reply

Have you noticed that much of the discussion in families and with friends, in the print media, on TV, and now on the internet is in the Passive Voice? Many people whine, complain, gripe, accuse, blame, call names, ridicule, grumble, bitch, rebuke,…Continue

Tags: and, behaviors, communication., attitudes, learned

Detroit Businesswomen Team Up to Get Rape Kits Tested

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by The Flying Atheist Nov 14. 2 Replies

Detroit Businesswomen Team Up to Get Rape Kits Tested"In 2009, a Wayne County assistant prosecuting attorney noticed…Continue

Tags: women, Enough, SAID, black, victims

Something Beautiful – Nathan Phelps & Seth Andrews

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Loren Miller Nov 10. 7 Replies

And it is beautiful, too, indeed, I think some of Seth Andrews' best work.  Interesting point: rather than Seth's dulcet baritone doing the narration, this piece presses Nathan Phelps' deep bass intonation into service, bringing a different flavor…Continue

Tags: Nathan Phelps, The Thinking Atheist, Seth Andrews, beautiful, something

Comment Wall


You need to be a member of Hang With Friends to add comments!

Comment by Joan Denoo on April 5, 2014 at 12:23am

Oh yes, I understand your situation Arp. Many do not want their atheism revealed because of personal, professional or other reasons and I honor that. 

I have been trying to figure out a way to get the fine writings that occur in various Atheist Nexus sites to the general population without exposing others to unnecessary risks. 

I am retired and living on my pension. I have nothing to lose by exposing myself to public knowledge of my strong anti-theist thinking. I think the problems that religion creates are so serious, they need to be exposed, challenged and replaced with ways of thinking that are healthier for the planet. 

The conversations that occur on Atheist Nexus are very different than on Facebook and Twitter. The real food for thought comes on these sites. This is where I come for nourishment and for a safe place to rant. 

Comment by Grinning Cat on April 4, 2014 at 10:42pm

Joan, you truly went through challenges I can't imagine... I'm glad you broke the cycle, and you and your kids went on to create a good life!

Comment by Joan Denoo on April 4, 2014 at 8:43pm

By the way, we ran away from our home on base at Ft Hood, TX in 1974; my husband was a full colonel by then. Yes, officers beat their wives and children, too. Don't let anyone tell you it is only the lower income, uneducated, low social strata that experience family violence.

I made a very good living after I earned my master's degree, when I had a private practice and most of my clients were wives of ministers, doctors, lawyers, judges and business executives. I was called as an expert witness in several child custody cases. 

Comment by Joan Denoo on April 4, 2014 at 8:33pm

Carl, Oh, yes! I think so. As a very small child I was always trying to figure out how to escape the razor strap which my mother used with perfect skill, and I was often trying to untangle their terrible fights. I was an only child and after WWII we lived in a neighborhood with no other children my age. I loved going over to Mrs. Robinson’s home with my collie and visit her many dogs, cats, chickens, Guinea hens and parrot. That is where I spent most of my time until I graduated from high school. 

After I married, I had to learn how to walk on egg shells and became quite good at it. When the children were born, my daughter was six weeks old when she received the first beating,  then my son Craig, and then my son Cary. I taught them how to be quiet when their dad was home, we spoke in sign language. 

One day in 1974, when Laura was ten years old, she put her hands on her hips, looked her Dad in the eye, when she was only eye level with his brass buckle belt and told him he didn’t have the right to treat us that way. 

Click! What did she say? She said he didn’t have the right to treat us this way! How many other times had he treated us in a way that he didn’t have a right to do? I put my kids in the car, with our two cats and their litters and drove two thousand miles, bought us an old condemned house and we lived in a tent until we got all the mice out of the place. We then moved in and slept on the floor, and used our tent for cooking. We did laundry in a basement sink, and began to work as a team. 

We planted a huge garden, made arrangements with Mert Rosauer, our local grocer, to scavenge his back room each week for out of date milk and meat. I worked full time, went to school and when the kids were in high school I finally had a master’s degree and began to make a living wage. 

That started 40 years ago, July 1, 1974. Now, 2014, that old condemned house is a lovely home with a beautiful garden where we hold weddings, funeral memorials, baby christenings, birthday celebrations and welcome in each new season with a festival. 

I lived with abundant resources and I lived with none. I know the struggles of families trying to survive with so many barriers to making a living wage. I spent my working years with people in trouble, whether it was at a boys’ ranch, at Community Colleges where I taught life skills for displaced homemakers, at battered women’s shelters, or at the prison where I taught men anger management and other skills they needed to survive in today’s world. 

I had to not only divorce my whole family, because we were generations of family violence victims, both men and women. I married a man with a similar heritage. To break out of the system, I had to break with family, religion, and community. 

Now, am I not one lucky woman!? I broke the cycle that goes back more generations than I have been able to find. I have gone back 15 generations on one grandparent … all with family violence. 

I am profoundly happy. I have met some rough challenges and I have been up to the task on every single one. Cancer was the most recent and I have been diagnosed with no cancer cells in my body. I had a chemo drip this afternoon and in three weeks I have my last. Life is too precious to be mad, sad, afraid, or guilty. 

Comment by Joan Denoo on April 4, 2014 at 7:53pm

Loren, Priceless! I'm reposting. 

Comment by Joan Denoo on April 4, 2014 at 7:28pm

I look for and read things that seem important to know and to develop my position on the topic at hand. I, too, don't look for the funny and don't see it until someones points it out.  Spud, you and I could be related. And I enjoyed the flies around stuff comment of sk8eycat
Compounding that fact, I am getting more concerned about religion and what it does to thinking. Knowing even sophisticated scientists fall for that religious claptrap, makes me shudder! 

Looking on the bright side, we have Dawkins, Krauss, Dennett, and 

Dale McGowan

Ayaan Hirsi Ali

Richard Carrier 

Hemant Mehta 

Michael Newdow 

James Randi

Julian Assange 

David Suzuki

Peter Boghossian

Richard Leakey

Sean Faircloth,  

Ricky Gervais

Seth MacFarlane

Quite a nice assortment of people to read, from whom to gain ideas. 

Comment by Loren Miller on April 4, 2014 at 6:41pm

Comment by Idaho Spud on April 4, 2014 at 4:38pm

Example: "Lots of flies around that stuff." makes me smile, although I would almost never think of it myself.

Comment by Idaho Spud on April 4, 2014 at 4:35pm

Yes, Joan, I am becoming less serious as time goes on, but I still see the serious side of things a great deal, and I very seldom see humor in most things until they are pointed-out to me.

Once something humorous is pointed-out, I do appreciate a fair amount of it, and smile at it, but not as much as a lot of people it seems.

Stupidity is almost never humorous to me, although I do quite often appreciate jokes about it here on A/N.

People hurting or embarrassing other people are almost never humorous to me, even if the butt of the joke is an ass.

Crudeness and vulgarity are usually not humorous either, although there are exceptions.

Comment by sk8eycat on April 4, 2014 at 4:27pm

Back in the 1980s, Harlan Ellison referred to the family Joan mentioned below as "Shitfly in his column in the Los Angeles Free Press. 

Gross, bit it fits.  (and it's another reason I refer to a certain collection of myths and fables as the buybull.  Lotsa flies around that stuff.)


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