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Hang With Friends

Location: Earth
Members: 883
Latest Activity: 2 hours ago

Come on in, pull up a chair!

Picture yourself spending some time with congenial friends, sharing your lives and pictures from your cell phones." They're curious about that cool game, song, movie, camping trip, art show, or other event that fascinated you. You talk about all kinds of stuff, poetry, styles, personal achievements, relationships, and bad days. You can share your inner child, and laugh together. They sympathetically listen to your feelings about serious topics like politics or climate change, even when they don't agree.

Personal validation comes from paying attention to one another, giving more than you get. Everyone respects you and themselves, despite our amazing range of personal tastes and interests. They'll tell you they don't agree with an idea or behavior without implying you're a bad person or somehow deficient. It's an "I'm OK, You're OK" kind of fellowship, where nobody tries to make himself look better by picking on somebody else.

Nobody here is into mind games. A discussion started with a loaded guilt-throwing question will be deleted.

This group is not intended to compete with other groups on topics they cover but to "fill in the cracks." Whenever a discussion dwells at length on a topic for which there's an existing group, we urge you to provide members a link to that group to continue along their tangent.

A comment is a shout-out, which will get lost in a few days, because the comment wall is just a random stack.

Please start a discussion to share stories, photos, and videos. Replies will pop up in your "latest activity" and a conversation can develop from the feelings and thoughts you contributed. Groups are built on discussions.

Discussion Forum

A Powerful Message from an old wise teacher :

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Thomas Murray 4 hours ago. 5 Replies

I received a gift this morning from a virtual friend, Pamela Smith:A Powerful Message from an old wise teacher :" One day an old wise teacher was walking through a village. A very angry and rude young man came up and began insulting him. "You have…Continue

Speak English? YOU FIRST! (Betty Bowers)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Thomas Murray yesterday. 4 Replies

Honestly, the title to this piece is badly under-representative of the content.  To be far more accurate, what we have here is Mrs. Betty Bowers, America's Best Christian, going on a rant.  Before you say it ... Say WHAAAA?  Betty Bowers ranting? …Continue

Tags: America's Best Christian, Betty Bowers

A Prayer for Our Nation (Betty Bowers)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner yesterday. 2 Replies

I'm going to keep this one short and sweet.  Mrs. Betty Bowers, America's Best Christian, has seen what is going on with the current occupant of the Oval Office, and my impression is that she is not at all happy with it.  True to her citizenship,…Continue

Tags: prayer, Donald Trump, Oval Office, America's Best Christian, Betty Bowers

Any Babymetal Fans Here?

Started by Bruce Carroll. Last reply by Idaho Spud Sep 12. 5 Replies

Any Babymetal fans here besides me? I have to ask because 1) I really like Babymetal and 2) Babymetal unknowingly played a role in my journey out of religion.For those who are unfamiliar with Babymetal, here is a link to one of their most popular…Continue

Tags: Japanese Idol, Babymetal

If you could rid the world of one thing, what would it be?

Started by Idaho Spud. Last reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner Sep 11. 30 Replies

Today, I heard Seth Andrews talk about the question, "If you could rid the world of one thing, what would it be?"  My first thought was religion, but after a few seconds I decided it would be irrational or anti-scientific thinking.  That would take…Continue

Tags: anti-scientific, irrational

Ignorance is Bliss: Why Religious People Seem Happier Than the 'Nones'”.

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Idaho Spud Sep 11. 16 Replies

“Highly Religious Volunteer More, Lie Less, and Claim to Be Happier”~ Houston Chronicle; “Strongly Religious People are Happier than Non-Religious”  ~ Christian Daily."The study determined that 40 percent of highly religious adults—defined as those…Continue

Tags: Nones, happiness, non-religiosity, religiosity, bliss

Comment Wall

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Comment by sk8eycat on September 22, 2014 at 9:33pm

Patricia, LOVELY photos!  The only thing I really want to do before I die is take a train (trains) to Churchill to see the Aurora, and whatever polar bears are still around.

Mostly I just want to stand outside with the lights overhead....i've been obsessing about them since I was 4 or 5 years old...I had a children's book, mostly watercolor illos, about Lapland....and there was that brilliant sky in almost every picture....

*sigh*

Comment by Bertold Brautigan on September 22, 2014 at 7:59pm

Wow! Great pix, Patricia. I've seen them from up in Fairbanks a couple of times, but nothing like this.

Comment by sk8eycat on September 22, 2014 at 1:45pm

What'd I DO?  (I've always loved Ella...and about 25 years ago I wrote a take-off on this song about my boss at the time.  Called it "You're the Pitz."  The guy was a brainless a##hat.)

Comment by The Flying Atheist on September 22, 2014 at 12:14pm

Sk8eycat, you're tops in my book. 

Comment by The Flying Atheist on September 22, 2014 at 10:04am

Chris, what a sad little poem.  Yes, the awkwardness of not being wanted by your peers. 

Comment by Plinius on September 22, 2014 at 3:12am

Thanks for your story, Felaine! My hat is off to you!

Getting picked for school sports reminds me of a wonderful poem, Carl. I wonder how many people remember the feeling.

 

 

Tich Miller wore glasses
with elastoplast-pink frames
and had one foot three sizes larger than the other.

When they picked teams for outdoor games
she and I were always the last two
left standing by the wire-mesh fence.

We avoided one another’s eyes,
stooping, perhaps, to re-tie a shoelace,
or affecting interest in the flight

of some fortunate bird, and pretended
not to hear the urgent conference:
‘Have Tubby!’ ‘No, no, have Tich!’

Usually they chose me, the lesser dud,
and she lolloped, unselected,
to the back of the other team.

At eleven we went to different schools.
In time I learned to get my own back,
sneering at hockey-players who couldn’t spell.

Tich died when she was twelve.



Wendy Cope

Comment by Ian Mason on September 21, 2014 at 11:37pm

There's an old saying, Felaine, that "discretion is the better part of valour" i.e. don't try to fight battles you can't win. Getting away from problems can be the wisest course to take, so your choice was the best for you. Be proud of all you have achieved through the years.

Comment by Joan Denoo on September 21, 2014 at 9:09pm

Felaine, I agree totally with Mindy, you are a cool person and a person worthy of respect. You certainly have had challenges in your life, things over which you had no control. I am so glad I guessed incorrectly about your father being controlling. I sounds like your parents had a very healthy relationship. I wonder what happened? I guess you will never know.

Your skating and the discipline it required to accomplish all that you did is strong evidence of your fine character.   

Comment by sk8eycat on September 21, 2014 at 9:02pm

Mindy, I honestly don't think my childhood was any worse than that of any one else I knew...we all had problems of one kind or another.  I'm kind of ashamed that I tended to run away from things I couldn't deal with any other way, but I survived, so I guess I did the right thing.  For myself.

At least I didn't "have to" get married at 17....I knew too many girls who did ....

Comment by sk8eycat on September 21, 2014 at 5:26pm

My parents were very social, liked to go camping, and travel till we moved here to Burbank when I was 5 (15 years after they were married.)  Dad's ambition was to start his own business and resign from Union Oil Co. (even though he was friends and a fraternity brother of the CEO.)  He did all that.

AND he "farmed" the extra land that was attached to the house until the city began surveying and dividing this neighborhood into standard lots. (Both my parents grew up on small farms.) 

Dad was NOT controlling...he and Mother worked things out between them without yelling, or animosity, as far as I know.  HOWEVER, he began drinking heavily when I was about 10 or 11; he was never mean or abusive...just stupid.  It nearly killed me because he was a brilliant man, and that's one of the many reasons I wanted a contract with ANY touring show ASAP.

SO....I was 20, and in Greenville, SC when I got a letter that the family had done an "intervention," and Dad was in a drying-out place.  He refused to have anything to do with AA, which is one reason I'm pretty sure he was a closeted atheist. 

Anyroad, he did dry out, and I left the show at the end of that year's tour, came home, went to work for him for 7 years....till he "fell off the wagon," and I ran away again.

So, yes, our family became dysfunctional, mother became bitter, and in February 1984, I was faced with the situation of having both parents in the hospital at the same time....Dad had to have vein grafts in both legs to relieve the gangrene and other complications of diabetes, and Mother had cancer all over her body...the worst was a tumor in her thigh bone.

I spent the next 9 years driving one or the other of them to doctors appointments and to the ER in the middle of the night.  In the summer of 1985 Dad had a massive left hemisphere stroke, and died that October.  Mother lived till July 1993...I was effing glad she was NOT here for the Northridge quake in January 1994....scary, scary, scary. It happened before the sun was above the horizon...just like the Sylmar quake.

But I have been knocking myself out trying to keep my head above water ever since then.  I'm tired of it all.  Or just plain tired.

*glub! glub!  glub!*

 

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