Information

Hang With Friends

Location: Earth
Members: 883
Latest Activity: 1 hour ago

Come on in, pull up a chair!

Picture yourself spending some time with congenial friends, sharing your lives and pictures from your cell phones." They're curious about that cool game, song, movie, camping trip, art show, or other event that fascinated you. You talk about all kinds of stuff, poetry, styles, personal achievements, relationships, and bad days. You can share your inner child, and laugh together. They sympathetically listen to your feelings about serious topics like politics or climate change, even when they don't agree.

Personal validation comes from paying attention to one another, giving more than you get. Everyone respects you and themselves, despite our amazing range of personal tastes and interests. They'll tell you they don't agree with an idea or behavior without implying you're a bad person or somehow deficient. It's an "I'm OK, You're OK" kind of fellowship, where nobody tries to make himself look better by picking on somebody else.

Nobody here is into mind games. A discussion started with a loaded guilt-throwing question will be deleted.

This group is not intended to compete with other groups on topics they cover but to "fill in the cracks." Whenever a discussion dwells at length on a topic for which there's an existing group, we urge you to provide members a link to that group to continue along their tangent.

A comment is a shout-out, which will get lost in a few days, because the comment wall is just a random stack.

Please start a discussion to share stories, photos, and videos. Replies will pop up in your "latest activity" and a conversation can develop from the feelings and thoughts you contributed. Groups are built on discussions.

Discussion Forum

Speak English? YOU FIRST! (Betty Bowers)

Started by Loren Miller 6 hours ago. 0 Replies

Honestly, the title to this piece is badly under-representative of the content.  To be far more accurate, what we have here is Mrs. Betty Bowers, America's Best Christian, going on a rant.  Before you say it ... Say WHAAAA?  Betty Bowers ranting? …Continue

Tags: America's Best Christian, Betty Bowers

A Prayer for Our Nation (Betty Bowers)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner 6 hours ago. 2 Replies

I'm going to keep this one short and sweet.  Mrs. Betty Bowers, America's Best Christian, has seen what is going on with the current occupant of the Oval Office, and my impression is that she is not at all happy with it.  True to her citizenship,…Continue

Tags: prayer, Donald Trump, Oval Office, America's Best Christian, Betty Bowers

Any Babymetal Fans Here?

Started by Bruce Carroll. Last reply by Idaho Spud Sep 12. 5 Replies

Any Babymetal fans here besides me? I have to ask because 1) I really like Babymetal and 2) Babymetal unknowingly played a role in my journey out of religion.For those who are unfamiliar with Babymetal, here is a link to one of their most popular…Continue

Tags: Japanese Idol, Babymetal

If you could rid the world of one thing, what would it be?

Started by Idaho Spud. Last reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner Sep 11. 30 Replies

Today, I heard Seth Andrews talk about the question, "If you could rid the world of one thing, what would it be?"  My first thought was religion, but after a few seconds I decided it would be irrational or anti-scientific thinking.  That would take…Continue

Tags: anti-scientific, irrational

Ignorance is Bliss: Why Religious People Seem Happier Than the 'Nones'”.

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Idaho Spud Sep 11. 16 Replies

“Highly Religious Volunteer More, Lie Less, and Claim to Be Happier”~ Houston Chronicle; “Strongly Religious People are Happier than Non-Religious”  ~ Christian Daily."The study determined that 40 percent of highly religious adults—defined as those…Continue

Tags: Nones, happiness, non-religiosity, religiosity, bliss

Eating Our Own: How You Can Save the Movement (David Smalley | The Thinking Atheist)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Daniel W Aug 27. 11 Replies

While I've been peripherally aware of him for a while, David Smalley has not spent much time in the center of my focus when it came to scoping out atheist material on YouTube or elsewhere ... at least up until now.  His talk – Eating Our Own – came…Continue

Tags: Seth Andrews, The Thinking Atheist, Eating Our Own, David Smalley

Comment Wall

Comment

You need to be a member of Hang With Friends to add comments!

Comment by Randall Smith on April 5, 2014 at 8:15am

Admittedly, I've led a very sheltered life. Reading I Fired God,  Joan's story, plus some recent television "exposes", I realize that there's a different world beyond my insolated walls--savage, brutal, sickening. My rose colored glasses have really fogged up recently. Thanks to all that are doing something about the ugliness of our society.

Comment by The Flying Atheist on April 5, 2014 at 1:42am

Joan, thanks for sharing the intimate details of your story.  It really humbles me and puts perspective on my own life.  I've been extremely lucky to have been raised by two caring parents along with three other wonderful siblings.  Other than the expected backlash of anger I may have received from my parents when I truly deserved it, there was no kind of abuse whatsoever in my childhood.  I can't imagine what it must have been like for you to live in a constant state of fear of physical or mental abuse, both as a child and as an adult. 

It seems almost ironic that it took the actions of a small 10 year old kid to stand up to your husband and to plant the seeds of freedom into you.  You did a wonderful thing for yourself and for your children by taking your life back.  And it shows when you post stories and pictures of them here on A|N.  You have accomplished so much in your life and have proven yourself as a extraordinary role model.  Hugs to you. 

Comment by Plinius on April 5, 2014 at 1:23am

And I can't figure why someone would want to beat two month old babies! That's a crime!

Comment by Plinius on April 5, 2014 at 1:20am

I marvel at your daughter, Joan, how she found the strength to defend herself - she must have learnt it from you, I think, but you didn't dare to use it at the time. Wonderful, how you escaped and grew strong!

I never laughed too in my parents' house. Sexist men only joke with people they see as equals, never with women. Such men target their unfunny jokes at women, then say women have no sense of humor.

The humor broke out when I felt good about myself, and it's still there. I even use it in teaching - so good when fifteen people have a good laugh together!

Comment by Arp on April 5, 2014 at 12:53am

Joan, I read your story, and I realized what you went through. I can only say you are a real life hero. You have my admiration.

About revealing my atheism, I have no fear in revealing my atheism to the people I know such as friends, family and relatives.

I'm only concerned about strangers and school bullies (I'm still a student) who just need a thing to pick on others.

Comment by Joan Denoo on April 5, 2014 at 12:23am

Oh yes, I understand your situation Arp. Many do not want their atheism revealed because of personal, professional or other reasons and I honor that. 

I have been trying to figure out a way to get the fine writings that occur in various Atheist Nexus sites to the general population without exposing others to unnecessary risks. 

I am retired and living on my pension. I have nothing to lose by exposing myself to public knowledge of my strong anti-theist thinking. I think the problems that religion creates are so serious, they need to be exposed, challenged and replaced with ways of thinking that are healthier for the planet. 

The conversations that occur on Atheist Nexus are very different than on Facebook and Twitter. The real food for thought comes on these sites. This is where I come for nourishment and for a safe place to rant. 

Comment by Grinning Cat on April 4, 2014 at 10:42pm

Joan, you truly went through challenges I can't imagine... I'm glad you broke the cycle, and you and your kids went on to create a good life!

Comment by Joan Denoo on April 4, 2014 at 8:43pm

By the way, we ran away from our home on base at Ft Hood, TX in 1974; my husband was a full colonel by then. Yes, officers beat their wives and children, too. Don't let anyone tell you it is only the lower income, uneducated, low social strata that experience family violence.

I made a very good living after I earned my master's degree, when I had a private practice and most of my clients were wives of ministers, doctors, lawyers, judges and business executives. I was called as an expert witness in several child custody cases. 

Comment by Joan Denoo on April 4, 2014 at 8:33pm

Carl, Oh, yes! I think so. As a very small child I was always trying to figure out how to escape the razor strap which my mother used with perfect skill, and I was often trying to untangle their terrible fights. I was an only child and after WWII we lived in a neighborhood with no other children my age. I loved going over to Mrs. Robinson’s home with my collie and visit her many dogs, cats, chickens, Guinea hens and parrot. That is where I spent most of my time until I graduated from high school. 

After I married, I had to learn how to walk on egg shells and became quite good at it. When the children were born, my daughter was six weeks old when she received the first beating,  then my son Craig, and then my son Cary. I taught them how to be quiet when their dad was home, we spoke in sign language. 

One day in 1974, when Laura was ten years old, she put her hands on her hips, looked her Dad in the eye, when she was only eye level with his brass buckle belt and told him he didn’t have the right to treat us that way. 

Click! What did she say? She said he didn’t have the right to treat us this way! How many other times had he treated us in a way that he didn’t have a right to do? I put my kids in the car, with our two cats and their litters and drove two thousand miles, bought us an old condemned house and we lived in a tent until we got all the mice out of the place. We then moved in and slept on the floor, and used our tent for cooking. We did laundry in a basement sink, and began to work as a team. 

We planted a huge garden, made arrangements with Mert Rosauer, our local grocer, to scavenge his back room each week for out of date milk and meat. I worked full time, went to school and when the kids were in high school I finally had a master’s degree and began to make a living wage. 

That started 40 years ago, July 1, 1974. Now, 2014, that old condemned house is a lovely home with a beautiful garden where we hold weddings, funeral memorials, baby christenings, birthday celebrations and welcome in each new season with a festival. 

I lived with abundant resources and I lived with none. I know the struggles of families trying to survive with so many barriers to making a living wage. I spent my working years with people in trouble, whether it was at a boys’ ranch, at Community Colleges where I taught life skills for displaced homemakers, at battered women’s shelters, or at the prison where I taught men anger management and other skills they needed to survive in today’s world. 

I had to not only divorce my whole family, because we were generations of family violence victims, both men and women. I married a man with a similar heritage. To break out of the system, I had to break with family, religion, and community. 

Now, am I not one lucky woman!? I broke the cycle that goes back more generations than I have been able to find. I have gone back 15 generations on one grandparent … all with family violence. 

I am profoundly happy. I have met some rough challenges and I have been up to the task on every single one. Cancer was the most recent and I have been diagnosed with no cancer cells in my body. I had a chemo drip this afternoon and in three weeks I have my last. Life is too precious to be mad, sad, afraid, or guilty. 

Comment by Joan Denoo on April 4, 2014 at 7:53pm

Loren, Priceless! I'm reposting. 

 

Members (883)

 
 
 

line

Update Your Membership :

Membership

line

line

Nexus on Social Media:

line

© 2017   Atheist Nexus. All rights reserved. Admin: Richard Haynes.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service