Information

Hang With Friends

Location: Earth
Members: 849
Latest Activity: 8 minutes ago

Come on in, pull up a chair!

Picture yourself spending some time with congenial friends, sharing your lives and pictures from your cell phones." They're curious about that cool game, song, movie, camping trip, art show, or other event that fascinated you. You talk about all kinds of stuff, poetry, styles, personal achievements, relationships, and bad days. You can share your inner child, and laugh together. They sympathetically listen to your feelings about serious topics like politics or climate change, even when they don't agree.

Personal validation comes from paying attention to one another, giving more than you get. Everyone respects you and themselves, despite our amazing range of personal tastes and interests. They'll tell you they don't agree with an idea or behavior without implying you're a bad person or somehow deficient. It's an "I'm OK, You're OK" kind of fellowship, where nobody tries to make himself look better by picking on somebody else.

Nobody here is into mind games. A discussion started with a loaded guilt-throwing question will be deleted.

This group is not intended to compete with other groups on topics they cover but to "fill in the cracks." Whenever a discussion dwells at length on a topic for which there's an existing group, we urge you to provide members a link to that group to continue along their tangent.

A comment is a shout-out, which will get lost in a few days, because the comment wall is just a random stack.

Please start a discussion to share stories, photos, and videos. Replies will pop up in your "latest activity" and a conversation can develop from the feelings and thoughts you contributed. Groups are built on discussions.

Discussion Forum

Your favorite photobombs?

Started by Ruth Anthony-Gardner. Last reply by amer chohan on Wednesday. 13 Replies

Running of the bulls photobomb.Continue

An AN member passed away

Started by Deidre. Last reply by Deidre Aug 18. 4 Replies

Went into the chat room last Friday night, for the first time in a while, and learned that Mequa passed away. I had been good friends with him for a time, but we had differences and stopped talking back in the spring of this year. I knew however,…Continue

A Parable by Mrs. Betty Bowers

Started by Loren Miller Aug 17. 0 Replies

Betty Bowers is becoming SO GOOD at delivering as America's Best Christian, she now does 30-second parables!  (Okay, 32 seconds!  Picky, picky!) Have You Had YOUR Betty Today?Continue

Tags: bible, parable, America's Best Christian, Betty Bowers

Goodwill to Few Men (Betty Bowers)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Michael Penn Aug 16. 8 Replies

Think Goodwill Industries does well by the poor?  Fact is, they do WAY BETTER for themselves, to the point where America's Best Christian, Betty Bowers, thinks they're ripping off the christian playbook a bit too well!  Have a look for yourself:…Continue

Tags: ripoff, Goodwill Industries, America's Best Christian, Betty Bowers

Steven Weinberg on his anti-theism

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Loren Miller Aug 2. 4 Replies

I like the sound of Steven Weinberg's voice. He has a calming impact on me as I rush to get my home of 41 years ready to sell and plan and put into motion the new garden at my daughter's home. My home is full o empty boxed quickly filling with the…Continue

losing faith (TheraminTrees)

Started by Loren Miller Jul 5. 0 Replies

TheraminTrees has recently begun producing a new series of YouTube videos, which added to a wonderful library of earlier observations regarding his experience of religion. Good as all those pieces are, I personally think they pale against this…Continue

Tags: story, history, faith, TheraminTrees

Comment Wall

Comment

You need to be a member of Hang With Friends to add comments!

Comment by Joan Denoo on January 7, 2013 at 2:17am

The Flying Atheist, I am biased. That said, one of the great fallacies of christianity is the imperative to love everyone. I believed that, hook line and sinker. "Love him to the Lord" was the sickest advice I have ever had and it is even evil. The more love I poured out the more the children and I suffered physical and mental pain. I don't want to ever forget that pain because it is jet propulsion fuel that keeps me working against violence in the home. 

I was also told by just about everyone to forgive him. I do not and will not. ever. He violated our trust without concern about what it did to us. 

The odd think is, I have finally learned how to forgive me. I tolerated intolerable behavior for far too many years and all it got me was more pain, shame, guilt. 

I feel strong now, and trustworthy, reliable, responsible, capable, compassionate and all the things I had to deny myself before. I am free. 

Now, as to my life at this time, I am the happiest I have ever been, I enjoy my family and friends and neighbors in very special ways and we all have special relationships. Winters I spend reading and writing and cooking the most delicious meals you can imagine. Spring, summer and autumn I spend most days in my garden, just playing, or visiting, or enjoying the neighbor kids. I don't have to do anything I don't want to do, and I can do everything I want, even though my budget was reduced by half in the most recent melt-down. No problem. I just enjoy what I have and am grateful to be alive and free from abuse. 

I wish all women and their children could say that!

Comment by Joan Denoo on January 7, 2013 at 2:05am
Pat, thank you for thinking of me when you saw the Coatia story on Rick Steve's Europe. I don't own a TV set but undoubtedly, it will come onto the internet at some point and I will definitely look for it.

Plitvice Lakes are so incredibly lovely, I know Rick will do a good job of sharing it with us.
Comment by sk8eycat on January 7, 2013 at 1:09am

Flying A: I think there issomething wrong with me.....it takes a great deal of effort on my part to either love OR hate, unless the other individual does something exceptionally kind/helpful, or, on the other end of the spectrum, hateful. 

A few years back, when I was in serious danger of foreclosure on my house, an e-friend I've never met face-to-face sent me $5,000 without my ever asking anybody for help.  He saved my a##...and he's funny and all kinds of other good things.  Last year, he sent me tickets to "Billy Elliott - the Musical," NOT cheap!  Just because he'd loved the show so much and knew I would, too.  We talk on the phone a lot.  You BET I love him!

I can't think of any individual that I hate any more...it takes too much negative energy...but there are types of people that I have on my "Better Dead" list....people who hurt children and animals... bigots...obscenely wealthy people who have more money than they could ever spend on anything useful, and use their financial power to try to deprive the helpless of what few benefits they are able to get (after filling out reams of gov't forms)....things like that.  Karl Rove...I loved his "meltdown" on FAUX Noose after all his nasty political work came to naught last November.

We did have one neighbor who became a major pain in the tush as she got older...mostly insisting that we we remove a lovely bunch of trees that hung a few feet over her property line.  Her adult children finally realized she was slipping into dementia, and found good assisted living arrangements for her.  But I never hated her....just got annoyed, and tried to ignore her.

As for ANY teacher who would call a child who was less than genius level a "dummy," she/he ought to be removed from classroom work.  Forever.  Such a person is in the wrong "business."

I once went to work for a woman who said she could teach me everything I needed to know about M.A.S. 90....a very complicated computerized accounting system.  She would tell me something once, not allow me to take notes, and pitched fits when I made mistakes.  I couldn't afford to quit, and spent a lot of time trying to think of ways to kill myself.  After a year I couldn't take any more of it, and did quit, and got disability because by that time I really was suicidal. 

The day after I walked out, she called to ask if I was still going to baby-sit her dog that weekend.  (I did.  I had nothing against the dog, and the money came in handy.)

After that I just ignored  her, too.

But, as I saiid before, both loving and hating have always been difficult for me...going back to childhood.  I like a lot of people, and things like books, waterfalls, and the ocean.  But I've always been a loner...sort of...neither loving nor hating, and avoiding conflict whenever possible.

Comment by Plinius on January 7, 2013 at 12:58am

And right you are, Booklover! I'm always shocked when I see the damage teachers like that cause. I work with elderly people; some of them can hardly take a course and do homework because of one such person in their school days who told them not to bother because they were too stupid. It makes my day if I can help them study without pain - far more important than how much they learn.

I'm not sure about the answer, Flying Atheist. Love and hate are both very strong emotions. Love grows stronger all the time and I find that hate grows less as you see and understand more of the person you hate - which doesn't mean that you condone their actions. Perhaps it's my age, but I'm less inclined to hate now, I get the feeling that my hating someone hurts me. A frigid rejection must be enough.

Comment by The Flying Atheist on January 6, 2013 at 8:34pm

Melinda, your post about hating the woman who acted horribly toward your son prompts me to bring up an interesting philosophical question that gets asked occasionally:  is it easier to love or to hate?  I personally think it's easier to hate.  I have hated some people (or groups) throughout my life, and still do, and it has been quite easy because, often enough, of just one incident or action.  Whereas, loving a person tends to come as the result of much invested time and an accumulation of numerous acts of kindness and caring that goes beyond general fondness or appreciation we may have for others.  Loving takes time and trust.  It is far easier and less time-consuming to smash and tear down than it is to build up and reinforce with trust and confidence in others.

Anyone have any thoughts on this?   

Comment by Pat on January 6, 2013 at 6:51pm

Joan, not to interrupt the thread, but if you have the opportunity to watch Rick Steve's Europe on PBS, he did a half-hour on Croatia. A good part of it was showing the Plitvice Lakes - the photo of the waterfall you put up earlier. Having seen it, it's a serious consideration for my bucket list.

Comment by Joan Denoo on January 6, 2013 at 4:59pm
booklover, Good for you! Such behavior in adults is just not tolerable. Do not be tolerant of intolerable behavior! If we don't confront them, our silence implies agreement.
Comment by Joan Denoo on January 6, 2013 at 4:42pm

John Lynch, that makes sense, the offended is the only one entitled to forgive, and frankly, I am not into forgiveness. It gets in the way of solving problems that are systemic. 
A man slaps his wife, she forgives;

A man slaps his wife, she forgives; 

A man slaps his wife, she forgives; until one of them dies. 

Comment by John Lynch on January 6, 2013 at 3:28pm

About the sex offender. Forgiving should be granted by the victim and no one else.Morons.

Comment by sk8eycat on January 6, 2013 at 2:08pm

Only in Texas....I hope.  (Sorry, Steph!)

 

Members (847)

 
 
 

© 2015   Atheist Nexus. All rights reserved. Admin: Richard Haynes.

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service