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Hang With Friends

Location: Earth
Members: 883
Latest Activity: yesterday

Come on in, pull up a chair!

Picture yourself spending some time with congenial friends, sharing your lives and pictures from your cell phones." They're curious about that cool game, song, movie, camping trip, art show, or other event that fascinated you. You talk about all kinds of stuff, poetry, styles, personal achievements, relationships, and bad days. You can share your inner child, and laugh together. They sympathetically listen to your feelings about serious topics like politics or climate change, even when they don't agree.

Personal validation comes from paying attention to one another, giving more than you get. Everyone respects you and themselves, despite our amazing range of personal tastes and interests. They'll tell you they don't agree with an idea or behavior without implying you're a bad person or somehow deficient. It's an "I'm OK, You're OK" kind of fellowship, where nobody tries to make himself look better by picking on somebody else.

Nobody here is into mind games. A discussion started with a loaded guilt-throwing question will be deleted.

This group is not intended to compete with other groups on topics they cover but to "fill in the cracks." Whenever a discussion dwells at length on a topic for which there's an existing group, we urge you to provide members a link to that group to continue along their tangent.

A comment is a shout-out, which will get lost in a few days, because the comment wall is just a random stack.

Please start a discussion to share stories, photos, and videos. Replies will pop up in your "latest activity" and a conversation can develop from the feelings and thoughts you contributed. Groups are built on discussions.

Discussion Forum

A Prayer for Our Nation (Betty Bowers)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Patricia yesterday. 1 Reply

I'm going to keep this one short and sweet.  Mrs. Betty Bowers, America's Best Christian, has seen what is going on with the current occupant of the Oval Office, and my impression is that she is not at all happy with it.  True to her citizenship,…Continue

Tags: prayer, Donald Trump, Oval Office, America's Best Christian, Betty Bowers

Any Babymetal Fans Here?

Started by Bruce Carroll. Last reply by Idaho Spud Sep 12. 5 Replies

Any Babymetal fans here besides me? I have to ask because 1) I really like Babymetal and 2) Babymetal unknowingly played a role in my journey out of religion.For those who are unfamiliar with Babymetal, here is a link to one of their most popular…Continue

Tags: Japanese Idol, Babymetal

If you could rid the world of one thing, what would it be?

Started by Idaho Spud. Last reply by Ruth Anthony-Gardner Sep 11. 30 Replies

Today, I heard Seth Andrews talk about the question, "If you could rid the world of one thing, what would it be?"  My first thought was religion, but after a few seconds I decided it would be irrational or anti-scientific thinking.  That would take…Continue

Tags: anti-scientific, irrational

Ignorance is Bliss: Why Religious People Seem Happier Than the 'Nones'”.

Started by Joan Denoo. Last reply by Idaho Spud Sep 11. 16 Replies

“Highly Religious Volunteer More, Lie Less, and Claim to Be Happier”~ Houston Chronicle; “Strongly Religious People are Happier than Non-Religious”  ~ Christian Daily."The study determined that 40 percent of highly religious adults—defined as those…Continue

Tags: Nones, happiness, non-religiosity, religiosity, bliss

Eating Our Own: How You Can Save the Movement (David Smalley | The Thinking Atheist)

Started by Loren Miller. Last reply by Daniel W Aug 27. 11 Replies

While I've been peripherally aware of him for a while, David Smalley has not spent much time in the center of my focus when it came to scoping out atheist material on YouTube or elsewhere ... at least up until now.  His talk – Eating Our Own – came…Continue

Tags: Seth Andrews, The Thinking Atheist, Eating Our Own, David Smalley

Comment Wall

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Comment by Joan Denoo on November 25, 2013 at 5:58pm

I have a little confession to make. Over twenty years ago my daughter married the most obnoxious, arrogant, domineering, offensive, egotistic man I have ever met. For years I visited them only when I felt I had to in order to keep up appearances or family obligations. I detested the guy. Wanted nothing to do with him. 

When I returned to school to discover why so many women and children in my family were victims of family violence, and during my master's training at Whitworth College, we were put through a program called Leadership Institute of Spokane (LIOS). It was designed for leaders in education, business, law enforcement, religious communities, government, etc. In that training I felt like all my skin, muscles and tendons were torn off my bones and put back together in ways that brought about mental and physical health, to repair religious dogma. Many ministers, church youth leaders, priests and nuns graduated from LIOS, many left the organized church and formed programs of their own, without the dogma of religion. 

Over the years, my beautiful, smart, business-like, gentle daughter took courses with The Landmark Forum. It is the same type program that I graduated from in 1979. She learned how to examine her thinking and acting, set goals, identify options, develop action plans and evaluate outcomes. 

Laura knew she was not happy in her marriage, was fed up with Larry's attitudes and made some decisions. Long-story-short. She set an ultimatum: take a course in Landmark before she would reconsider her decision. 

Larry attended Landmark several years ago, recognized his fears, anger, guilt, shame, and depression. He learned how to read his own body, how to communicate with others, how to listen for feeling and meaning, how to see that black-white thinking left out a huge area of more-tha-acceptable gray, gave up notions of dominance and learned how to think and act in a partnership of equal rank. He learned how to manage his kids in ways that made all the difference in the world to them. 

Now, their two daughters, and two of their oldest grandchildren have taken courses to learn these skills. Nothing magic happened, they all learned how to live in healthy relationships. 

Many people think Landmark is a cult; you will find those articles by Googling. They have a right to their opinions, however they just do not understand what happens in experiential learning. It is the most powerful of education methods, not recognized by many trained professional educators. People who call it a cult simply judge out of ignorance. 

It is not a program for people who want instruction, lectures or sermons. It sets up situations to demonstrate how and why "normal" is not necessarily "healthy". 

I am profoundly and deeply in love with my daughter and her husband. They have so many skills that I can only dream of having. I can't wait to spend time with them and their menagerie living deep in the forest of Pend Oreille County. 

There, my confession time is up. 

Comment by Joan Denoo on November 25, 2013 at 5:26pm

Joseph, I have to get my 2 cents worth in here, even if I am a little late. 
Take whatever annoys you even a tiny, little bit, add five or ten or twenty years to the relationship and multiply the annoyance 1,000 times. Pretty soon, the things you don't like about her will outshine the things you like about her and you have all that time, money, energy and annoyance to deal with at some future date.

Explore your own thoughts, feeling and needs to determine what you need in a relationship, and on what you are able to give up. 

Tell her exactly what you think, honestly, and set the limits within which you are able and willing to live in a relationship with her. 

There are kids that desperately need sectarian influences in their lives to repair the damage caused by religion dogma. Clearly, it can't be done in a religious oriented youth group. If it is kids you like working with, then leave the religious environment and find a non-religious group or start one.

By-the-way, this is an excellent place to rant. Lots of old trash get cleaned out, and if you have some stinkin' thinkin' going on in your own thought processes, you will be able to confront them and decide if you have some trash you want to discard.

I don't know how many times I have written, "Thanks for the feedback, I was wrong." Those are the sweetest words I ever have thought or said or written. That is how delusions, denials, etc., gets sorted out.  That is how one becomes a mentally healthy human adult. 

 

Comment by Joan Denoo on November 25, 2013 at 4:58pm

Patricia, according to my son, daughter and son-in-law, all who work in or own their own computer companies have very strong thoughts about Microsoft and Windows. My daughter got me into Mac's years ago and now I am using MacBook; I love it, take it with me in my brief case, can take photos with it. Not good quality, but at least I can gap a shot if not too detailed. 

My daughter uses MacBook Pro in her business, Larry uses one in his business, and they just bought one for the Pend Oreille County Volunteer Fire Dept. 

Comment by Loren Miller on November 25, 2013 at 4:26pm

Joe, stating that you don't believe in anything supernatural is hardly what I would call an inflammatory statement.  Question: would you former girlfriend follow and join an atheists' group?  Is sauce for the goose a horse of a different color?

Have her try that shoe on the other foot - see how it feels to her.

Comment by Idaho Spud on November 25, 2013 at 4:23pm

Joseph, I'm more hardcore than you and would tell her that I'm sorry, but I'm certain religion does a lot more harm than good, so I can't support her.  That's basically what I've told my family.

Comment by Joan Denoo on November 25, 2013 at 2:25pm

Comment by Joan Denoo on November 25, 2013 at 2:03pm

Spud, I like Facebook because new information constantly arrives on my major interests, politics, economics and religion. I simply block anyone or thing in which I am not interested.

I want my story out there because I want people to understand family violence. Not being seen, and people having so many myths about it, I want rich/poor, educated/uneducated, dominant/submissives to know the harm that comes from socialized behaviors, and I want victims to know they don't have to be victims.

It seems even some brutes read my stuff and some get violent with me and others ask me questions. My skin is so tough, most bad stuff just bounces off and makes me more determined to tell my story!  

Comment by Idaho Spud on November 25, 2013 at 1:54pm

I think I will close my G+ page.  I never use it.

Comment by Idaho Spud on November 25, 2013 at 1:52pm

I've not had any bad comments on my facebook page, but have been thinking of closing it before it happens.  I don't have any personal things on it, and only keep it so I can see what a Private Salt Lake City ex-mormon group is doing.

I'm still thinking about it, but at the first comment I don't like, it will be history.

Comment by Joan Denoo on November 25, 2013 at 1:51pm

Patricia, you and I must be twins. "gimme my reading, music, pets, & leave me the hell alone, thanks" is my theme in many ways. "Don't tell me what to do" fits just a little better for me. 

Love your photo of the starfish. 

Steph: your kitty and bird look so cute. 

 

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