Teaching obedience to my children did not work the ways I wanted it to. They, as small children, would try to figure out what the authority figure thought and then follow that example. Some of the authority figures in their lives were not worthy of being followed; I hunted for a better way of raising a critical thinker. I ran across some excellent ideas, started experimenting with different parenting styles, came up with what I think are not only better parenting styles for children and for parents as well. All those old education, psychology and sociology foreparents are dead now; they are replaced with a strong and lively group of people who make good sense. Their processes yield the kinds of adults that are healthier, more compassionate, and better critical thinkers than children raised to be obedient.
FREEOK 2013 - Dale McGowan: "Raising (Actual) Freethinkers"
Dale McGowan: Parenting Beyond Belief
Influence without indoctrination (Parenting Beyond Belief #4)
My grown children now have children and grandchildren. Watching them raise their children gives me so much pleasure; they participate with their children in healthier ways, they require critical thinking of their children, even as they parent with loving care. Even now my children express love in ways that empower their children to flourish, to become all they can be. I don't think they will experience the kinds of dysfunction into which they were born. They learned more effective and efficient ways to be with their children that encourages communication, problem solving, conflict resolution, and they will be prepared to take on the messes that my generation leaves behind, with our notions of obedience, submission, and self-crucifixion.