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Saying hello! And a parenting question.

Hi everyone! I'm happy to have found this group, I have so many questions and would like to seek advice for more seasoned parents. Currently my boys are almost 6- just started Kindergarten, and 4 years old. My oldest, Zane, is a natural freethinker and has already asked many questions about God and religion. While I always start with 'some people believe...but Mommy thinks this..'. He has pretty much agreed with my version and has stated to family members and friends that the Bible is full of make-believe stories and even told some friends who just lost their grandfather that heaven doesn't exist. Before I had taken them to church for 6 months or so, I was at the time a reluctant atheist. I changed my mind to a proud atheist after attending the bullshit church. So as a result, Zane has taken what he learned in sunday school as the opposite of truth and has been open about his feelings. Although I have spoke with him many times about being respectful of others beliefs and there is no right or wrong when it comes to those topics. Also to never say those things as a 'fact' rather than opinion. Personally, it pisses me off that there's such a double standard. Had my son spoke of love for Jesus or how the bible is the word of God, there would be no problem. But it's causing a rift between me and my friends. Any suggestions?

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Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by egan thomas penney on September 1, 2011 at 7:08pm

people are born with a sense of empathy, it's etiquette that takes a while to learn. personally i think a world of universal tactless blurting would be a much better one.

you've got me picturing a new fable. "once there was a boy who cried wolf, was hit by lightning and died, the end"

Permalink Reply by FeloniousD on September 1, 2011 at 10:14am

How old is/are your child/children Egan?

Permalink Reply by egan thomas penney on September 1, 2011 at 7:09pm

i have none, my interest here is presently academic, my observations based on my own experiences as a child.

Permalink Reply by Grace Fitzpatrick on September 1, 2011 at 11:45am

We have taught our children that unsolicited religious conversation is bad manners - no matter who starts it. You know where you stand and where your friends stand. It seems harsh, but this is probably a topic to tell your son to avoid even if others bring it up. I tell my children when their family or friends start talking about god and religion to look at them as if they are talking with their panties showing or their fly unzipped and try to change the subject to one of shared interest.

As for your friends, well, now they know how you feel. If you can, try to engage them in open discourse on the topic, but realize they may be angry and irrational when it comes to religion and find any disagreement a challenge to their faith. I tell my kids people get kind of crazy when it comes to religion and it's not always wise to engage the crazy.

I hope I am making sense. I have a head cold today.